Is it reasonable to ask a woman to change her profile picture?

It sounds as if you like her far more than she does you, that you want an instant commitment on your terms and anything less has you questioning her intentions.

You are insecure, you are wanting to move things along far too quickly and you don't trust her, all with no reasonable basis.

Please leave this woman alone, if you can't be mature enough to ask her the question of what your relationship or explain exactly what you want, then you have no business being in a relationship.

No mate you just can't doesn't matter how long I was with someone if they had been married for years and lost their partner there is no way I would or could even ask to change their profile pic.

She lost someone so close to her and clearly wants to still be close,that love will never die but that does not mean that she's not capable of being in love again.

A few months in and your asking this question I wonder if it stems from your own insecurities please don't ask her to do this in my opinion it would be incredibly insensitive

@NewmanintownRob Can I ask you this?

As a 58 ish year old man you must have dated in your youth and also after your divorce.

Were you this worried with all your relationships (about whether the women were interested or just playing you along)?

You're coming over as someone much younger who doesn't know how to bide your time and let things develop or not.

It looks a bit like 'I want to know NOW' .

If you're as besotted with her as you seem to be, you should understand that a sure way to frighten her off is to come over too intense.

@WallaceinAnderland To be fair I think he said 5 months (which is 20 weeks.)

You've said that her Facebook page is 2 years out of date and you can't see any recent posts.

So is mine!

I rarely use FB and as a mature woman I'd not post photos of any men in my life (I'm married, but in theory.)

I really don't see how no picture of you on Facebook and a former photo of her and her husband is anything to worry about.

I am many other posters have suggested that you have 3 choices.

1 Ask her how invested she is with you.
2 Talk in general about how you're looking for commitment in a relationship at some point.
3 Stop stressing over losing a few months of your life by 'wasting it' if she dumps you.

ARE YOU LISTENING TO ANY OF THIS ? (It appears not.)

That sounds about right to me, Newman. Just take it easy. Don't read too much into her texts etc, she is obviously friendly and very fond of you. Nobody could blame her for taking her time, you need to do the same. Please stop being obsessed with her being a widow, there are loads of widows, all different. Also stop worrying about her wedding photo, it is part of her life. Finally, please stop typing 'dunno', you are not an inarticulate teenager. :-)

Oooof. Well you've just showed your hand, Sir.

I would be running for the hills 🙄

You chose to come to a female led forum, looking for advice which you have routinely ignored , people don't agree with are "hateful & mean".
Maybe you should advice elsewhere ( with a professional )

Just dump her, for your own sake.

So for all I know I could be played as just another man in her bed and there may be others. She does a lot of things with her girlfriends, and I would have no idea if those are truly women or men

Fuck's sake!

As a widow, I'm begging you to leave her the fuck alone - she really doesn't need this level of insecurity in her life.

You don't appear to be listening to any of the advice here @NewmanintownRob

Either you wait this one out and see what happens. Or you ask her how she's feeling about you.

I have to agree with others that for a man of 58-ish you're coming over at times like a 16 year old who's absolutely smitten and wants an answer NOW.

You're very intense about it all

Is this a common theme in your relationships?

You can't rush a commitment.
Either live with the uncertainty of what may happen or ask her how she sees you.

@NewmanintownRob
You're giving off some "interesting" vibes Have you had much social interactions? Any successful relationships?
Any disastrous relationships?

Ffs it's just Facebook.

Do this poor woman a favour and get back on to Match.com set her free...

So you want to stalk her life via social media.

Hmm.

Not good.

OK, now you're getting 'stalkery' and paranoid. And sounding a bit possessive.

She is free to live her life as she chooses. So are you. If you can't accept what she does or says at face value, if you have to wonder if she's telling you the truth, then you aren't ready for an honest and serious relationship.

You are coming across as way too needy. You've only known her a few weeks and you're already talking about potential marriage.

I think once she gets the measure of you she will be backing off. You're too intense.

Ooooh, there it is.

You don't trust her and you want to be able to monitor her via her Facebook.

I was willing to give you the benefit of the doubt, but your use of language, the word "player", referencing how many men she's dated up to now and your suspicions outlined in your last post have a very strong whiff of "manosphere" and red pill.

Good luck with that, I'm out.

. I also know I’m not moving too fast.

That's not necessarily true. You may not be moving too fast for you, but that doesn't mean you're not moving too fast for her. And at this point, if you want to 'keep' her, then you need to slow down.

@NewmanintownRob Tbf I've only encountered you on here today and you seem to have a somewhat soft grasp on reality, you give a lot to your own thoughts and those of your friends and family and not do much to this woman.
You seem to have your own take on what people are telling you, almost like you are anticipating being told it, and need a defence. All a little "odd"