To say that the healthcare system hasn't a clue when it comes to mental health??

I have nothing to say other than get off the fucking thread. Would you tell someone with cancer to think it away? Wise up
Sadly, this is the issue. @CoffeeCantata is absolutely correct but when you are in it, all you want is someone or something coming up with a miracle cure to take the pain away. Being told that that cure doesn't really exist and that you have to build resilience whilst gaining understanding of what are triggers to build you own coping mechanisms is not what you want to hear.

Psychiatrists mainly deal with severe cases of mental health that affect people in such a way that become completely unable to function in life. Most of the therapies are pharmaceutically based, the treatments are heavy, needing close monitoring and can even be life threatening. Indeed, many people have died as the result of poor monitoring.

Psychiatrists are medically trained, 5 years in medical school, and then speciality trained for many more years.

Many people nowadays suffer from debilitating anxiety and depression for which medication can help, others do well with therapies or a combination of both, but for the majority, it is about learning to make changes in their lives, in the way they think, feel, and accept their strengths and weaknesses.

Obviously no one knows you here and what you've been through so can't make specific comments about your situation, but the NHS isn't to blame. Society is. The NHS can't cure everyone, they can only provide what is available to them and that's not the answer and miracle that those suffering are so hopeful for.

There isn't one, really. Stop people developing MH issues in the first place? Absolutely impossible - the causes are so complex: childhood abuse, trauma, neglect, addiction to social media, inherited medical conditions or things like asd, adhd, etc etc.

I'll be brutally frank, and I'm sorry to sound so negative, but I think the only (partial) answer is to re-set the current attitude to MH and basically go back to the 'just get on with it' attitude of the recent past. Obviously, not for serious conditions, but for those where social engagement and physical activity, say, could help. For every person who has a serious MH problem, there will be one who claims they 'have anxiety', without any actual diagnosis ...believe me, I've met them.

Also, we've all been sold the line (mainly as a result of social media - which has a lot to answer for in this matter) that life should be happy and trouble-free - but it never has been for most people. If we can rid ourselves of the idea that we should be happy all the time, and that nothing should cause us stress, that would help for many people. Investigate Buddhism - that has a lot to teach about acceptance and not struggling against things which we can't change.

Ready to get torched....but I'm not talking about people like the sons of my two friends. I mean the girl I used to work with who couldn't do any of the slightly less pleasant aspects of her job because she claimed to have anxiety. She hadn't mentioned this at the recruitment stage, of course.

My daughter has needed MH treatment - so I'm not just saying this from a position of smugness.

But the NHS was just never set up to deal with the long-term and very complex issues posed by MH problems. It was set up originally to provide straightforward surgery, free glasses and dentures and basic pharmaceutical treatments.

MH problems are by their nature often very long-term and difficult to treat. And they're usually open-ended too. Personally I've never heard of anyone saying 'Well, I got 6 sessions of counselling, so that's me sorted!" Have you? While I sympathise (having been at the sharp end) I really don't see that the NHS as it stands can possibly be expected to treat MH adequately.

I suspect MH spending will necessarily be focused on the most acute cases - like the son of a friend who is basically on suicide-watch, or ofr patients whose conditions make them a danger to the rest of us.

I don't know what the answer is, but I don't think it will be simple - or just a matter of funding either.

I am sorry for your experience and. sadly, it is not an isolated incident.
Healthcare system has a clue about a lot of things. But this doesn't change the fact that there is no money to train, recruit or retain qualified staff. In my area, the waiting list for neuropsychiatry is closed because they currently have 3 years worth of patients on their books already and only two members of staff. With the best will in the world, I wouldn't be able to refer someone.
I understand the desire to blame people who work in the system but, trust me, we are just as frustrated by lack of joined up care and the length of waiting lists as you. I left MH work because I was tired of constant hoops I had to jump through to ensure someone has a long term follow up plan and being told that the service I am asking for simply doesn't exist or did exist but no longer does due to funding and recruitment issues. Or does exist but the patient does not qualify because they haven't been hospitalised yet. Or, my favourite one, that they can't accept a patient who doesn't self-harm which results in a patient who never self-harmed beginning to do so out of desperation for support. So yes, there is one less staff member in my previous team and my post is still not filled 2 years later... but what can I do.
The buck stops with the government, I'm afraid. If you want to direct your anger there, we would greatly appreciate it. Because when we, as health professionals, try to raise it we are being told that one can't just "pour money into a broken system". This money doesn't buy a SEO a new Lamborghini. It literally pays for bums on seats to staff the services people are desperate for.