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To wonder if this idea will ever get off the ground? Surrogate grandparenting

63 replies

girlfriend44 · 24/11/2024 14:13

The adopt a grandparent/surrogate grandparenting scheme.
This has been discussed many times. I think it would be a well received service.
Plenty of families around who'd like to match with a grandparent and plenty of older people would like to become a surrogate grandparent etc.
How does this get going. Legally and properly?

There is a Facebook group for Américans where they post and advertise themselves.
The page dosent take any responsibility though.
What do you all think? You make your own decisions, just use the page to find people.

Is there a way.
I was thinking more like an agency where you actually meet and introduce people.
Any ideas, or it never going to happen?

Could you arrange events where people attend so parents are present.

OP posts:
BigManLittleDignity · 24/11/2024 19:34

Marblesbackagain · 24/11/2024 19:04

Eh no, age doesn't remove risk and I am guessing there may be very different views on many issues.

Familiarity from birth and family bond, be it genetic or otherwise is what builds relationships.

I wouldn't be bringing my child around strangers. Checks or no checks.

I don’t agree with this statement about families at all. So much abuse and neglect and discontent happens in families. I’m not saying I’d invite a stranger in but equally, families do pose a risk.

Gagagardener · 24/11/2024 19:28

Can't see it working. And I am a very community-minded, volunteering, kind of person.

As@Marblesbackagain said: Familiarity from birth and family bond, be it genetic or otherwise is what builds relationships.

SmalllChange · 24/11/2024 19:25

girlfriend44 · 24/11/2024 14:29

think the idea of adopt a granny is lovely, but far too open to exploitation of the granny concerned.

Then you keep.in touch and if the match dosent work out, you move on to someone else or opt out.

think the idea of adopt a granny is lovely, but far too open to exploitation of the granny concerned.

Why are you only concerned about the grandparents being exploited?

Marblesbackagain · 24/11/2024 19:04

Eh no, age doesn't remove risk and I am guessing there may be very different views on many issues.

Familiarity from birth and family bond, be it genetic or otherwise is what builds relationships.

I wouldn't be bringing my child around strangers. Checks or no checks.

Narkacist · 24/11/2024 18:53

It sounds nice but probably the chance of getting a GB-news watcher seems quite high, so I can imagine it would fizzle out quite quickly

MargaretThursday · 24/11/2024 18:50

It was something heavily advertised 24 years ago when I had my first, and never got off the ground.
I suspect even less so nowadays when people are more aware of safeguarding.

Helpimfalling · 24/11/2024 18:46

Gingerkittykat · 24/11/2024 18:25

I would never encourage adopting a grandad after the nice old 80 year old in my sister's street ended up befriending a neighbour and using that trust to sexually abuse his 6 yer old.

He would pass PVG checks because there was not enough evidence to convict, it turned out he had done the same thing previously but again no conviction/

Yes the fact this happened to be as a child too makes me feel quite Ill when I hear the term adopt a grandparent.

Gingerkittykat · 24/11/2024 18:25

I would never encourage adopting a grandad after the nice old 80 year old in my sister's street ended up befriending a neighbour and using that trust to sexually abuse his 6 yer old.

He would pass PVG checks because there was not enough evidence to convict, it turned out he had done the same thing previously but again no conviction/

girlfriend44 · 24/11/2024 15:44

Bump. Hoping for more traffic.

OP posts:
girlfriend44 · 24/11/2024 14:29

think the idea of adopt a granny is lovely, but far too open to exploitation of the granny concerned.

Then you keep.in touch and if the match dosent work out, you move on to someone else or opt out.

OP posts:
DrZaraCarmichael · 24/11/2024 14:20

there are a lot of befriending schemes already in place that anyone can volunteer with if they wish to befriend an older person. Benefit of joining a scheme run by Age Concern, the local council or similar is that there is oversight and someone "in charge". If you have concerns about the person who has "adopted" you through a charitable organisation or similar (or have concerns about a neighbour/friend/relative) then there is someone you can raise that with. If it's an individual person to person arrangement then there's none of that safeguarding.

There are numerous schemes around, in our area there's a weekly afternoon tea where older or socially isolated people all meet up as a group in someone's home, people volunteer as hosts or drivers or just to sit and chat. There are also telephone befriending services, or services catering to specific groups such as the blind, or ex-service people.

I think the idea of adopt a granny is lovely, but far too open to exploitation of the granny concerned.

SmalllChange · 24/11/2024 14:14

I like the agency idea as I imagine they'd at least DBS check the prospective grandparents and parents.

MrsKwazi · 24/11/2024 14:14

I think there is a lot of scope for exploitation - both ways.