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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Husband always prioritises in laws- AIBU

26 replies

Zhosh · 24/11/2024 13:23

So for the context, we had a separation for a year and just started trying again. His family had a role alongside other factors. He does a busy day job, I work weekends so we barely ever get any time. He stays mostly at his parents with our 3kids during the weekend, they live very nearby.
I told him yesterday that I have afternoon onwards free today so we can take kids somewhere together, he first said its his sisters birthday so they are going out. I said okay, its the only Sunday I had free until Feb. Then he said they would meet me around 3/4. Today he started saying he will see because his family is saying its his sister’s birthday (who is out having fun times with her partner , reasonable - kids at her parents where my kids are as well rn). This lead to a major argument bcz he said I am twisting things while I only said that they are always seeing each other over the weekends/ so many family members that they celebrate a birthday/month at least. I cancelled my plans so many times for him and his family like missing my nephew’s birthday bcz they had a celebration and wouldn’t let me go etc. He hung up on me and turned his fone off. AIBU? He has done this on other occasions as well that he would just cancel things on me or tell me he won’t be doing this with me as his dad has called or he is going to see his sister and bil.

OP posts:
Anonymityisvital · 24/11/2024 14:00

I think it's very sad that when you have so little free time on a weekend he wasn't keen for you to spend time as a family unit.
Your post reads more as though he sees your relationship as that of co parents rather than as a man and wife team.

Turning his phone off and refusing to talk to you about things is childish and unpleasant. The fact he prioritises his birth family feeds in to this perception that he hasnt taken on board that he is supposedly married with a life partner and not a young boy living at home.

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