Exciting idea or madness.

I think it sounds like a great idea, but fear that your sticking point will be your DH. You really don't sound that compatible if he wants a big place in the country and you would much prefer a small place in the city. Those kind of things are important in life. You need to want the same or at least be happy to find a compromise.

How about somewhere like Ramsbottom? The vast beauty of the moors is nearby, property is generally very nice imo with lots of 2/3 beds so more manageable to maintain, and you can get to Manchester very easily still. Or Todmorden, Hebden Bridge...

What exactly does he do? 🤔

Doesn't clean, doesn't garden, doesn't earn much. Makes lots of demands of what he wants.

I'd be hugely resentful if I were you.

I think you should look at other options as well as a city centre apartment. There are some beautiful areas surrounding Manchester, where renting an apartment wouldn't be as extortionate as in the city. Some of the old mill conversions in the High Peak are fabulous, with rural views but easy access to Manchester by train and bus. It doesn't sound as if your current lifestyle is sustainable in the longterm.

I think you have a husband problem here OP.
The more you post about him, the more entitled he sounds.
So he wants to be surrounded by a lovely garden, but won’t do more than mow the lawn?
It’s great that you are thinking ahead, but consider all your options before committing to anything further. Too much responsibility on your shoulders OP, he needs to be realistic and pull his weight.
You sound lovely, hope it works out for you whatever you decide.

I would definitely go for it. I personally love Manchester city and would love your plan myself.
There is countryside in all directions for day trips and weekends away.

Each to their own, but I've always thought 'reverse retirement' from a rural idyll to a city with easy transport, medical services, entertainment, shops etc all within walking distance makes perfect sense.

If your DH wants a garden and you don’t, could you move to a city but have access to an allotment?

Surely there's outskirts of Manchester that's countryish and compromise on a small detached cottage or bungalow

Not unreasonable, but apartments in the city centre are very expensive compared to houses a little out of the centre. Manchester has great transport links, you could easily get a house with a garden on the metrolink line or a short train away from the centre, where life might be a bit more peaceful. Also, having friends living in city centre flats in Manchester, you need to be very careful about your choice. Not all have been built very well and have issues with damp, soundproofing etc. My brother worked on a development where the walls between flats were paper thin. You'd get more value for money and less stress of the hustle and bustle if you chose a neighbouring suburb - likely less of a drastic change from the countryside.

I think you have come up with a good idea but I would be worried that because you are renting that the rent will steadily increase as you’re getting older and you’re ability to earn is reducing and for the same reasons if they suddenly tell you that they are selling up you may find yourself in the position of having to find another property without the ability to earn the money needed to cover private rental prices and deposit or the circumstances to manage a move again.

you are early sixties which is young but in a decade or more things could look very different.

with all that being said though I think you absolutely should move. Make your life easier now. You deserve to go into retirement (I know you’re a it off that yet!) with an easy lifestyle and money in your pocket so you can actually enjoy it!

bugger being going on 70 stuck in the middle of nowhere trying to clean a house and maintain a garden ALONE while caring for a husband who’s health is deteriorating and can’t or won’t be able to help. Even getting a pint of milk will be hard.

my family member (bought rather than rent) sold a bigger house in the countryside like you described and moved to a village near to two bigger towns and a city and said it’s the best thing she ever did! She’s close to shops now in a house that’s easier to clean cheaper to heat closer to family and community. She’s never been happier.
the money from the sale also gave a cushion so she felt safer while establishing her new life.
She loved her old home but wouldn’t ever want that again now she is getting on a bit!

He wants a rural lifestyle in a bigger house, detached with a garden, exactly what we have now but reality is that we can't afford it. When he was working regularly we had lots of money and we don't any more. Neither do I want, anymore to be in the grind of the domesticity of a house this size. Given that I do it all I want to free up my time by having less of it to do. Obviously he should do his fair share but he doesn't. He's lazy but also have a long term health condition that means that a lot of the time he's not fit for much

sorry to sound harsh @Rainydaysbeforesun but your OH isn't coming out of this well. He's actually being really unfair and selfish, giving you the burden of worry re affordability, making you do all the running about, maintenance and life admin. All of that falls on you while he just sits there with arms folded and "no, what is the question" attitude.

you could be spending the best years of your own life, shackled to a rented property that's clearly far too big and expensive, getting increasingly frustrated thinking about lovely enjoyable things you could be doing instead, rather than the drudgery, and getting more resentful of his inflexible attitude.

he needs a reality check "how many beans make five" conversation very soon!

Have you looked in detail at the costs? I'm really surprised a fully serviced apartment (which I'm assuming it would be to have gym/pool/concierge stuff) in central Manchester would be cheaper than renting rurally, I imagine it would be extortionately expensive!

I think the biggest issue isn't where you live, it's that he is lazy so you carry the household burden and doesn't have a meaningful plan to resolve your financial constraints his lack of work has caused.

When you say that you don't think this is going to work itself out, so what is his actual proper plan, what does he say? You're not a million years off retirement age, how does that factor in the plans to stay in this big rented country house?

Maybe instead of springing your idea on him full stop without any prep you have a conversation about options? Bearing in mind status quo isn't one of them.

You are not unreasonable to raise it but if he doesn't even want to downsize where you are he's unlikely to jump at the idea.

But where you are isn't sustainable for you some some kind of change needs to be made. Can't hurt to suggest it as a starting point for negotiations! But you will have to be firm that is will be some kind of change, the status quo isn't an option.

There are a few advantages to renting over home ownership, and this is the big one…try it! If it doesn’t work, try something else. Do a 6 month rental, or a longer term Airbnb. Never mind Manchester, what about Paris? (if wfh is an option.)

Apart from anything else it’ll make you realise that barely any of the clutter we surround ourselves with is at all necessary …(speaking from experience 🤣)

Wow that is a huge leap.

couldn’t you compromise?