So, met a woman through work 18 months ago, ish. Maybe a bit longer.
She quickly latched onto me and proclaimed me as her her best friend. Used to call me every day and spend 2/3 hours a day chatting. Sometimes more.
I didn't have anything better to do at the time, and she needed a friend, she's had a terrible couple of years by all accounts, so went with it. I always found her overbearing and overly familiar, but hey-ho, some people just are.
I lost my daughter last year, to a 42 week stillbirth. Immediately after I lost her, I sent a message to all of my friends, explaining what had happened, and that I needed to disappear for a while to process and deal with losing her, and also to help my other children through the ordeal. This woman did not allow me that. Despite saying I couldn't talk, she would message me multiple times a day, call me every day, and when I wouldn't answer, she would message me, instructing me to call her. And when I didn't answer her, she would message my husband and other coworkers to see how I was.
I went back to work in February and had no choice but to see her, and even though I was still reeling from losing my baby, and moving in with in laws and dealing with FIL dementia diagnosis, I resumed contact with her. She would call me daily and expect 2/3 hours conversation.
I have since moved out of in laws house, and become pregnant again, and my mental health has taken a massive nose dive. I'm off work sick and have retreated from everyone. I am really, really struggling, but this person will not leave me alone. Calling and messaging almost daily.
I have messaged and said I am unable to make conversation with people at the minute, due to being in a really bad place, and have since essentially ghosted her by now not even opening her messages or answering her calls... I do feel terrible but I don't have the energy or headspace for anyone, not just her. My focus is on trying to survive this pregnancy, and hope that this baby lives, and trying to support my family, who are also struggling with the loss of their sister. I am not the same person I was this time last year.
I saw her today. She stopped her car in the middle of the road and yelled at me until I went over. I told her I was not good and wouldn't be going back to work for the foreseeable and her paring words, as I hurried off were "call me"
I think, maybe if she gave me the space I asked for and didn't constantly call/message, I would be able to resume contact with her eventually. Knowing that she was in work, crying about how hard it was for her to not speak to me, after I lost my daughter and now, apparently, incessantly talking about me in work to my co-workers, I'm not sure whether I should feel guilty or whether she is in the wrong.
Could I have some perspective please.
Please be gentle.