Page 6 | To not go on this holiday

Ickityick · 2024-11-21T20:23:56+00:00

Booked and paid for a winter break a long time ago. Person I'm going with has been hugely irritating me the last few months with their general tightness and CFness. We are sharing a room. Should I go or write it off!

Original poster

Ickityick · 22/11/2024 12:49

DoreenonTill8 · 22/11/2024 12:46

What?! Not even the pretence that she's not a freeloader?!

Nope, I was so enraged that I sent her 7 specific examples and said I was tired of her freeloading off me, she hasn't replied to that

OP posts:

hailu · 22/11/2024 12:49

Typical CF response.
However, she's been told. So once you get there stick to what you have said and just do your own thing.
Or do you think she might pull out now and demand you pay her her half back?

Original poster

Ickityick · 22/11/2024 12:48

Not really as it would buying her out, then paying for a flight change name fee etc

OP posts:

DoreenonTill8 · 22/11/2024 12:46

What?! Not even the pretence that she's not a freeloader?!

Wexone · 22/11/2024 12:43

Ickityick · 22/11/2024 12:39

Well I emailed her and said I wouldn't be paying for her, etc etc bring your own stuff.

She has just replied and said I am.sorry you feel like that.

Now I'm absolutely raging at her , plainly takes no responsibility

Sweet lord thats shocking 😱 - Can you dump her and bring someone else ?

Original poster

Ickityick · 22/11/2024 12:39

Well I emailed her and said I wouldn't be paying for her, etc etc bring your own stuff.

She has just replied and said I am.sorry you feel like that.

Now I'm absolutely raging at her , plainly takes no responsibility

OP posts:

LemonadeCrayon · 22/11/2024 12:20

OverthinkingOlive · 22/11/2024 12:19

Please go and put daily updates on here just because I'm so concerned about it all and obviously not for my own entertainment whatsoever 🙃

🤣🤣🤣

LemonadeCrayon · 22/11/2024 12:20

OP usually you can change the name on the booking for quite a minimal cost. Is there somebody else who might be available to come with you instead and buy her out of her share of the trip, especially if it was a bargain price as you said?

OverthinkingOlive · 22/11/2024 12:19

Please go and put daily updates on here just because I'm so concerned about it all and obviously not for my own entertainment whatsoever 🙃

Vax · 22/11/2024 12:15

Where are you off to OP? We might be able to give you tips on nice solo places you can go.

Roryno · 22/11/2024 12:09

I’d pack a pot noodle too, so if she gives you a sob story about not. Wing able to eat you can say “I knew you’d do this, so I brought this!” After previous experiences id only have agreed to all inclusive.

Another option is asking her to give you £150 or something upfront so you know she can cover basic food.

Original poster

Ickityick · 22/11/2024 11:59

thiswaypleasethankyou · 22/11/2024 11:55

Is her name on the room? If not surely you could give her what she paid for the hotel back and tell the hotel it's only you that is using the room - she won't be able to do anything if her name is nowhere near the booking! Sorry if I've missed this info somewhere, I did scan but couldn't see it.

Hi, it's a package so flight and hotel, although I'm the lead passenger both our names are on the booking.
I've checked us both in. Apart from sharing a room at night I don't plan to spend much time at all with her. Meals are a no no and I will be quite happy with a good book somewhere !

OP posts:

thiswaypleasethankyou · 22/11/2024 11:55

Is her name on the room? If not surely you could give her what she paid for the hotel back and tell the hotel it's only you that is using the room - she won't be able to do anything if her name is nowhere near the booking! Sorry if I've missed this info somewhere, I did scan but couldn't see it.

ifIwerenotanandroid · 22/11/2024 11:46

ReleaseTheHoneyBadgers · 22/11/2024 08:15

It’s somewhere in thread.

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'Yes financial ( hates to pay for anything herself so usually comes out with a sob story when the bill comes or just says gaily Oh I thought you were treating me so i didnt bring nay money
) also likes to borrow things and never returns or if she does they are ruined ( this is what caused the issues a few months ago as it was something of mine that was new and she gave it back after having worn it every day and wrecked it)'

Lollypop701 · 22/11/2024 11:09

If you do get caught eating with her ask for separate bills from waiter when you order

Caroparo52 · 22/11/2024 11:08

Find your own inner CF ness and stand up for yourself.
. Look.... I'm only paying for what I've consumed. This is your portion to pay.
No you can't borrow.. No I won't lend.
No.
She's CF because you let me.

StickyProblem · 22/11/2024 11:06

Good for you OP! Enjoy yourself!

Take all the advice about not eating with her and protecting your stuff.
You could find a word she really doesn't like if you have any problems. Eg "Don't be a freeloader" or "Don't be a scavenger". As others have said this behaviour relies on people being polite and not calling it out. She won't like hearing it stated openly.

DoreenonTill8 · 22/11/2024 10:53

If it wasn't for having to pay to change names I'd wonder if her nefarious plot was to make it shit so you'd cancel, she'd then offer your place to someone for free... as long as they paid for everything else!! 😆

bigkidatheart · 22/11/2024 10:22

See you at the airport. As I have paid for the trip I would appreciate you paying for some of our excursions. I have budgeted for what I need spending wise, suggest you do the same as I will not be taking any extra and won't be able to help you out if you run short.

P.S. Don't forget your toiletries, I'm only taking enough for myself

Original poster

Ickityick · 22/11/2024 09:45

AwakeNotThruChoice · 22/11/2024 09:40

@Ickityick When you get to the hotel and settled in, go and sort out the Room safe (sometimes pay deposit for key or whatever)

I’m not joking! You can lock away your stuff.
just do it discreetly. Don’t make a point

I'm actually going to work out how the lock works on my case and keep it locked!

OP posts:

Wexone · 22/11/2024 09:45

Volumedelachanel · 22/11/2024 00:05

Me too! It won't be a relaxing break with you constantly having to watch out for her freeloading whilst guarding your toiletries

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I have to agree with this - Good lord you can get super cheap suncream and toiletries at the supermarkets abroad. How much money is it ? If you cancel now will you get anything back ? I would be suggesting take the hit on money

Onlycoffee · 22/11/2024 09:44

Ickityick · 21/11/2024 21:52

Yes I have decided to message her at the weekend and without being confrontational say that her attitude towards never paying for herself has to change as I won't be.paying for her.

See what she says, last time totally agreed with me but then carried on regardless!!!

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Could you also suggest a budget, say to her "I'm bringing £500 for spending money, that's my absolute limit"
Which does two things, suggests a budget for her to bring which she may or may not have/want to spend, in which case you get the holiday on your own, and two, sets another boundary that she will definitely have to pay for herself.

AwakeNotThruChoice · 22/11/2024 09:40

@Ickityick When you get to the hotel and settled in, go and sort out the Room safe (sometimes pay deposit for key or whatever)

I’m not joking! You can lock away your stuff.
just do it discreetly. Don’t make a point

ReleaseTheHoneyBadgers · 22/11/2024 09:40

If you make sure to tell her your intention of holidaying solo but still sharing the room, hopefully she’ll choose not to go. Win!

Original poster

Ickityick · 22/11/2024 09:36

ItGhoul · 22/11/2024 09:32

She sounds awful. But if you've been away with her before, you must have known this when you agreed to go on holiday with her a second time?!

If you want to pull out of the holiday then pull out rather than go on a holiday you'll hate. It will obviously be the end of your friendship, but it sounds like that's what you want anyway, as you dislike her and find her behaviour really difficult to deal with.

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Its a good point, after the last holiday last year I swore never again, then I got some sob stories and felt sorry for her and in a weak moment agreed to a bargain winter break. Kicking myself now!

I have bought up the constant freeloading before and I found that quite hard but it hasn't made a difference , so yes friendship for me is over as I don't want to constantly be on guard and waiting for the next CF incident !

However I think I can do this holiday doing my own thing , and then NC when I am back

OP posts: