To think something has gone wrong in schools? https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cz0m2x30p4eo

This struck me as a very good example of the disconnect between teachers, children and parents that’s going on.

It’s very well know that neurodivergent children often mask in school. Call it the coke bottle effect, the stress bucket, whatever, but I’m appalled afresh that so many teachers have never heard of it.

This is something that will affect the child and their family of many of your pupils. The fact that teachers still use this as a stick to beat parents with is shocking.

It’s so easy for teachers to call out parents in this way (haven’t read the thread beyond this post, but I’m willing to bet my arm that this will feature heavily), but it’s so lazy, and just shows that they’re so up their own egos that they cannot accept that the way schools have changed that sees so many teachers despairing and wanting to leave, is the exact same reason that has children not coping as well.

So short sighted.

I’m sorry if this is controversial but I would suggest that you move schools as not all schools are like this!
I am a headteacher and myself and the DH are almost always in classes supporting behaviour. In my previous school it was the same (wasn’t the Head then - just SLT). We just got outstanding ofsted for EYFS and we have children displaying the behaviours mentioned but we put good routines in place to support them, work with parents and seek outside support. I’m not saying it’s easy by any stretch (still have bruises from 2 weeks ago from 1 child biting me) and I completely agree with lots of the posts about parents needing to take accountability for their children’s behaviour and the curriculum being too full to allow teachers to work with children on their behaviour. I’m just suggesting that maybe your school / SLT could be dealing with things in a more positive way.

I agree with this.

My friends son is 11, he is autistic with ADHD and learning difficulties. He can't really read, can't write anything other than his own name, can't do written down maths at all. Despite years and years of targeted interventions, and her doing everything she can to help him, it just isn't something he's ever going to master. He is however excellent with his hands and can use loads of tools very skilfully already. He can also do pretty good mental arithmetic in a woodwork context. She wants him to study a trade, but there's no pathway for that for him. He has to stay in school and study for GCSEs which he will never pass, and already he is becoming disengaged from education and starting to play up to get out of lessons he can't understand. But he's "too able" for special school placements according to our LA. It's very sad to watch.

I do think we need more SEN provision schools, not wothin mainstream. It’s not fair on the kids who need a different approach to have them in mainstream and it’s not fair on mainstream to have class time taken up with meeting significant additional needs.

I think we should have high standards in school, we should accept not everyone should be going to uni and strengthen trades qualifications and apprenticeships. It doesn’t do anyone any favours to make school easier or less demanding to accommodate instead of understanding that different children have different paths and pushing ahead to make sure able children get where they should be going. We need both, we need the carpenters and we need the hospital consultants. We should bring back gifted and talented programmes as well.

I don’t know, my parents worked very long hours 6 days a week. We were often home alone at a very early age (think 6ish). We still got good feedback on behaviour and were always on the working in greater depth tables. The expectations start young. A lot of school is being able to sit down, pay attention and not be disruptive. Thats enough to learn something. My own is an extremely active child who struggles to be sitting down too long but she manages fine as long as she can have a run around a few times.

Expectations about behaviour are set way before they get to primary imo. Obviously I’m not talking about children with SEN.

It is well known that some ND children mask at school and then behaviour explodes at home. Not necessarily parenting. Please don't blame parents by default if you don't really have an understanding of ND.

My son used to be fine and now does the same. He literally walks through the door and lets everything out that has built up in the day. He has complex needs, but this happens with higher functioning children too. He is fine after a while, but it wasn't happening before and now has started to happen daily. We haven't changed the way we parent...

Sorry but this is rubbish.
In the 25 years I have been in the classroom the range of ability and SEN has increased dramatically. Add in EAL students, those with mental health difficulties and it’s a recipe for disaster. It is not fair on anyone.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with having different types of schools. We already have SEN schools but just not enough of them. When I started teaching I too had a blackboard and no TA. I also only had 25 children on average in a class. One of my classes this year has 8 different languages spoken. There are 32 in every class. All children deserve the best education possibly. Putting them all together in a huge building isn’t the answer. Education needs a radical overhaul with lots of different types of schools.

Agree.

And everyone is afraid now or dont know what is the right way of punishing children for bad behaviour because parents are told 'do this and you'll traumatise your child'

But so many parents must be exhausted. It's not just "feckless". When I was small you could have a parent without a degree working and bring in enough money to support a small family and another parent work a few hours if you wanted to. Now so many parents are both working full on jobs and kids are in nursery or childcare or after school care most of the day and by the time they come home the parents are exhausted. Especially if it's 2 outside the home physical jobs without flexibility. Also when parents are struggling col, depression, unsuitable housing, unsupported kids with additional needs etc then it is hard to be all the things you'd like to be to your kid. It's about surviving.

Its quite different to the work from home flexible jobs you read about on mn.

Toddlers sat in pushchairs on phones whilst parents look at phones. Very little interaction. Older children on Tic toc. Social media is killing communication and watching parents role model behaviour.

Yeah something is wrong. The feckless parents, raising feral kids.

I tend to agree wirh this too and particularly the rise of screen use over the last 10 years. Children coming to school speaking in American accents because of all the YouTube they’re watching who are plonked in front of a device as soon as they get home because it’s easier 😢

Totally agree with this. I sometimes think it’d be great for anyone who hasn’t done it to come and observe my classroom for a day - 30 children, most with a need of some kind ranging from EAL to non verbal autism, and 1-2 adults trying to manage behaviour and actually teach something!
I’ve reset my mindset recently and realised that it would be ridiculous to think it was actually possible to meet everyone’s needs in this scenario, so I’m not failing just doing the best I can given the circumstances which are out of my control.

But you didn't have Jack, who was born at 23 weeks and is doing amazingly from where he started as it was predicted he'd never walk or be able to manipulate objects. He is walking and that's amazing, but he can't run, he can't yet use a pencil, and he only speaks in single words.

You didn't have Hana, who has complex autism and often bangs her head on the table, never sleeps through the night, has no verbal communication and is only just beginning to use intentional pointing or hand-leading.

You didn't have Ilmi, who has down syndrome and associated hearing and visual impairments, difficulties with producing speech sounds, behavioural challenges and physical disabilities.

You would now have the first because they wouldn't have survived the NICU. Medical advances and changes in treatment protocols increased survival rate in babies born at 23 weeks by 12% (4% to 20%) from 1995 to 2006 alone.

You would now have the third because the average life expectancy of a child with down syndrome is now 60 years old. In 1983, that was 25. In 1960, it was 10. Therefore, more of them are alive long enough to go to senior school, and the expectations for what they will be taught have improved because of social change and a desire to better their life chances.

You would now have the second. I don't know why. Perhaps because of environmental factors causing an increase. Perhaps because they previously would have been in a special school, or at home as parents were too embarrassed to send them to school. Not because of increased awareness; that makes no sense. These are not children we would ever have looked at and thought "she's ok." They have complex, pervasive and multiple challenges due to something innate within them.

''Pea-ness'' now that is a witty child! I'm laughing at that joke and have woken the dog.

So so true.

I was having coffee at local cafe alone and sitting with dog on the grass, and a darling little toddler was running around with early autumn leaves, catching them and wanting to show them to his Dad {who was old}
The Dad was just oblivious, glued to his phone.

The sweet child tried to get the Dad to look, and then picked up his /her Ball and again tried to get Dad's attention.

The little tot wandered off -I kept an eye on them, and the Dad was head down all the time.

It was so upsetting.

Watch your Kids! interact with them.

Same with dog owners- head down in phone rather than watching dog. {Dogs also check in with owners a lot -or should.}

Mum when young taught in a very deprived area of London {Poplar} and said the children were lovely.
She managed a class of 30 on her own and with ease.

The children were generally well behaved and the head teacher was wonderful.

Something has gone very awry with society and 'parenting' as a whole- Screens and lack of stories/reading.

Obviously there are parents who do lots of reading and games like puzzles with their children still- but generally iPads and other tech for little kids is bad news.

Is it not because we have loads of academies now . Watched a documentary about off rolling and basically any kid that perhaps had learning difficulties etc that was bringing results down they off rolled which js bloody bad.
Also listening to the radio many teachers tonight on lbc said that parents are siding with kids if teacher says thwy have been naughty etc. So are parents not helping the situation either

Exactly this. I blame social media.

My friend lives on a very quiet road where much of the fairly new estate cuts through a path to her road & goes for a walk past her front room. We sat watching them a couple of weeks ago while we sipped our coffees.
Lots of babies in prams and pushchairs. Every single mother WITHOUT EXCEPTION had their head buried in their phone as they pushed their offspring past. Now maybe some babies were asleep but surely those that are awake you talk to, point things out like the horses in the field, the leaves falling off the trees?
Children are not learning from their parents because their parents ignore them at a time they could be learning from them. My eldest does a bit of volunteering with kids and was surprised recently that none of the group (primary) could identify common birds such as a blackbird or a magpie - she could identify loads as soon as she could talk (under 2) because we did RSPB Birdwatch every year.

I agree. Shorts and reels have completely destroyed attention spans.

And yet it's not linked to ADHD?

I remember doing weekend write ups too. They don't do that any more because some kids have such miserable lives.

I think it's a great way of getting some insight re safeguarding and for those with ok/happy homes it's nice to document things at a young age as we forget so much.

I'm sorry OP but I don't recognise this classroom set up and I taught EYFS / KS1 until last year.
It's like others have said. Cuts in support staff and specialist services and the ridiculously too highly pitched and irrelevant, boring, dry curriculum that expects 5 year olds to use question marks and exclamation marks in their writing and year 4 children to add fractions.

It’s so depressing. I thank my lucky stars every day that I grew up long before screens and social media. I feel like it’s TikTok that’s been the most destructive coupled with the lockdown it was the worst combination

The children and youth of today are utterly screwed, a bad education system with exhausted demoralised teachers, addicted to screens, a broken society, no money, no prospects, no aspirations, no creativity, vapes, terrible diets, a world at war.

Think of them like plants trying to grow in dark rooms with no water. 🥀🍂

A bright future seems like a distant dream.