Adult Children who live at home the heating goes on when your parents say so.

If the parents don't want the heating on because of the cost then they need to charge their kids more if they WFH to cover the cost, or ask them to pay more towards heating bills in the winter with the money they save on commuting to work.

If you are working, you need the environment to be a reasonable temperature - the house shouldn't be so cold you need to sit at your desk in a coat, scarf and gloves, but they shouldn't expect to sit there in a t-shirt either. Reasonable to layer up a bit, but there's a point where even when you do that you're still cold sat at a desk, and that affects your ability to concentrate. Surely there has to be a bit of compromise both sides here?

Utter rot. We have the heating set for the coldest person. me.

Daughter is 14, gets home before me, I've told her she is welcome to put the heating on if she's cold when she gets in. If kids say they are cold, put the heating on.

I actively avoid going to my parents house for this reason, it's always freezing cold. Told to wrap up, don't much enjoy sitting in our coats indoors.

My eldest thought anything but a light teeshirt was an outrage...

Funny how he wraps up now in his own place

Wtf 😂 I find it so depressing to charge your kids rent. But if you do is that not to pay for the extra cost of bills? Surely these parents aren’t expecting their kids to contribute to their mortgage?!

I don't charge my adult children rent. If they are uncomfortably cold of course they can turn the heating on.

Surely they are living as a family and not in a dictatorship? The kids and I used to discuss this kind of thing and come to an agreement.

Not everyone can afford to have the heating blasting all day. My teenagers would live in a sauna if they could. Damn right I control the heating.

Anÿone paying rent has a right to be warm in their home

Surely it's up to each household how they do this?
Some will he happy with a heating free-for-all, some will have set hours, some will suggest space heaters, some might settle on asking for a contribution on WFH days. Different circumstances, different people, different properties.

Frankly I'd be horrified if someone in my home was left without a source of heat when it's -4 outside, simply because I wasn't in; that seems unnecessarily mean.

Myself and DH work from home and use small heaters to warm up the rooms we work in, rather than heat the whole house. It is bitterly cold here today and we need some form of heating, but we can't justify heating the whole house either. It doesn't have to be no heating at all versus heating on all day.

I’d they’re paying board then they get a say I reckon. You wouldn’t sit in a rental with no heating in the freezing cold.

I moved back home for a bit after uni. My dad never puts the heating because he has a log burning stove, so 2 rooms are warm and the rest is like a fridge. I used to dread having a shower as a teenager. Luckily I wasn't wfh though so could just stay in the warm room in the evening!

I don't think I could have lived there for long as an adult.

THIS!!!

Work from home with an electric blanket draped over your shoulders?

In general I'd agree with you but not when it's literally snowing outside

People working from home absolutely need heat. For parents to pull rank and refuse to allow this is absurd and unreasonable. Some employers require wfh employees to be practically chained to their screens. You can't get up and walk around or make yourself a hot drink or even use the loo according to some employers, fgs. And you can't present yourself in online meetings looking as if you're kitted out for a polar expedition.

I'm guessing these parents never had to sit for eight hours in a cold room, perhaps trying to type with frozen fingers.

Situations like this can lead to a breakdown in relationships between parents and adult children. Acknowledging that the adult children are trying to do what their jobs require when they wfh is sometimes beyond the ability of some parents, and the frustration and resentment of those young adults can cloud relationships for the rest of their lives.

Ask for more in rent if bills are a problem?

I thought YABU and then I saw they wfh but you don’t seem to - in which case YABVU!

Of course they don't pay "the market rate".
They're your children, not lodgers.
Ye gods, some people know the cost of everything and the value of nothing.

We went away for 6 weeks in September/October. I told adult DS he could put the heating on if it was cold, and showed him how to turn in on (as it had been off since Spring). As it happens, it was quite mild whilst we were away so he didn't switch it on. The day we were coming home, I messaged him to ask him to put the heating on, if he hadn't already. He had forgotten how to do it!! So no danger he'd be turning it on without permission!

A friend of ours controls the heating by Hive and has been known to turn the heating down from his phone when his adult DCs ramp it up!

Well if you’re going to be so bloomin reasonable about things there’s no place for you on this board 🤣

Imagine a world of communication and compromise…

I think you'll be a lot happier when you stop getting wound up and giving directives to a vague group of people who will all be in unique situations, with different incomes and personalities and home lives, about what they "need" to do in their own homes.

Here is a plug in heater. Please use this for your wfh space and do not heat the whole house when no one else us in

Better response /\

Did you give them another option between heat whole house and nothing?

My adult ds has been moaning about being chilly at home this week. He pays board but a piddly nominal amount that goes nowhere near half the bills (excluding the mortgage), when he's walking around in literally a muscle vest and shorts.

Ask me again when you've got trackies, socks, slippers, a T-shirt and jumper on! It's winter, and cold. Dress better!

My adult child and I would discuss this and come to a compromise. They pay rent but also I love them. If 8 couldn't afford it I would explain that and see if they could chip in some more rent or if we can look to cost cut elsewhere or buy them/helped them buy an electric blanket or something!