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Original poster

To take time off work with no notice?

31 replies

Holaluluulu · 21/11/2024 10:54

I was raped at the beginning of the month. I didn’t tell anyone and tried to just bulldoze my way through things. Ive only just told my husband what happened. But I can’t keep doing it anymore. I think I have PTSD. I’m not sleeping. I can’t eat. I can’t concentrate on anything. I keep having nightmares. I feel awful and unsafe all of the time. Like I’m waiting for it to happen to me again. I know that’s not true but I can’t shake the feeling.

The thing is work is really busy at the moment. There are so many deadlines pressing down on me. I haven’t told anyone in work that anything is wrong and I think have seemed my usual happy self. It helps that I work from home so easier to hide. I’m going to the GP today and I think I’m going to ask that I’m signed off for a few weeks to help me catch my breath and get back to me.

But I’m worried about work. I really can’t afford to lose my job. Will it look bad that I haven’t told anyone anything until now? And the first they’ll hear of anything being wrong is me disappearing off for a few weeks? Especially when it’s busy?

I feel guilty that I’m not coping. But I’m not. I’m falling apart. I had an ectopic pregnancy earlier in the year and took time off then as well. I thought I was a more robust person that this.

OP posts:
AltitudeCheck · 21/11/2024 11:05

Contact rape crisis, they will understand exactly what you are going through and be able to signpost you to resources to support you. It's absolutely normal to feel how you feel and to need time to process this. I'd encourage you to get some help to begin to process this now rather than trying to suppress it and push through.

Absolutely do ask for time away from work and consider telling a trusted person in HR or a line manager if you feel you can, otherwise just tell your GP and ask to be signed off.

I'm sorry this happened to you and I hope you get the support you need to recover. You aren't alone.

HateThese4Leggedbeasts · 21/11/2024 11:01

If you had broken your leg and had to take time off at no notice, you would just do it!

This recovery time is needed and that's the final answer with regards to work.

I think you make it clear you had a very serious incident and have been signed off. You don't have to give full details to them right now.

I'm sorry you have had such an awful experience. Do not blame yourself for not being "robust".

I dont you have a lack of strength but rather you have had some traumatic events close together.

Original poster
Holaluluulu · 21/11/2024 11:00

I think I’m just worried it’s going to come from nowhere. I’ve seemed fine. Jolly even. Then suddenly I’m saying at the busiest time of the year I can’t manage. I know it’s a silly thing to worry about. But its a newish job (only been there just over a year). I love it and I’ve already taken 3 weeks off in February when I had an ectopic pregnancy.

OP posts:
MrsBennetsPoorNerves · 21/11/2024 10:58

Of course you need time off, OP. I'm so very sorry that this has happened to you.

Please go to your GP and get yourself signed off.

sweetpickle2 · 21/11/2024 10:58

I am so sorry this has happened to you.

Do what you need to do for you, work can wait. Get signed off, get support, take whatever time you need.

vivainsomnia · 21/11/2024 10:56

OMG OP, this is not the time to think of work. Ask your GP to be signed of and most importantly to provide you with the appropriate support you need. Don't do it alone and don't, whatever the circumstances, blame yourself for what happened.