To have refused to sign this parenting contract about attendance

YANBU

Its just shocking and patronising.

Who can we as a collective speak to about this nonsense? I’m sick of school obsessing about attendance (by kids are both at 100% so I have no skin in the game). They also tell the kids they’ll basically be failures if they don’t have 95%+ which really angers me as your opportunities don’t end at the age of bloody 16. it’s unrealistic and it treats children like numbers

Yes we were asked a few months ago to provide our ‘thresholds’ I had to put in writing the reasons I would keep dd off if she was ill I explained things like : If she had a high temperature (but they wanted to set a threshold of 38 and for it to be checked by the school and verified - I said no if she’s clearly unwell and it’s for example 37.8 I would make the decision to keep her off and I wouldn’t be dragging her in all the way to them with no paracetamol to lower it just so they could see it for themselves the compromise is GP verifies but my gp is happy to accept a photo of the reading and will then add it to the record for me to screenshot), also things like D and V or flare ups of any of the chronic conditions .

Dd is 15. Attendance is very low (62%). Has never been above 80% since starting secondary.

Dd has multiple medical issues. We have given so many letters from consultants. For the last year if she has for example had a regular illness eg d and v we have had to get proof (a GP appt) or threats of fines are immediate.

Today I was asked to sign a contract that I will make sure attendance improves. I refused as I have no control over it - I’m really thinking now that home education is the only way forward ? Because I refused I was told there will be further referrals made ? Feel like I’m going mad and talking to a brick wall if it was that simple and I could sort things out I would have ??!!

Dd has asked me not to disclose the conditions as there are a lot and may be identifying. I’m able to say they are all long term / permanent and that we are currently not having much luck finding effective therapies

Get the school do apply for the EHCP. They will do it better.

I know you’re getting quoted left right and centre, but PLEASE, as part of your role, can you look at what the school can do to improve the situation? It is not about sending out teams of letters and looking forward to escalation. If you have sent out 100 letters it suggests that there are serious issues with the school. The tone of your post is appalling and short sighted.

I look at the lives of children in hundreds of schools and the lengths some schools go to to help the children in is humbling. I do hope you are focussing on what is right for each child, instead of focussing on what the parent should do. For every parent who could do better, there is a parent desperate for their child to be happy in school. I write this in full understanding that there are parents who are failing their children by not supporting their education. I urge you to not tar us all with the same brush.

OP my dd attendance is around 70% - she missed one day in every ten for medical appointments; this will increase in December. She also usually misses at least half a day a week - not always, but often. Sometimes I drop her off and just wait for the call to pick her up. My dd does all her homework and is doing well in all submitted work and scores highly in tests. So I believe you when you say your dd is doing well despite her poor attendance. It can be done! Well done to your dd.

Your dd’s school sound horrific. If the issues are mental they need to work with your dd around addressing these, providing a quiet space etc. If they are physical, there is nothing that can be done is there? I would absolutely start raising this now; speak to educational welfare, organise DLA (it is an entry pathway to assistance and helps with disability recognition) and raise with Ofsted and the governors. Definitely raise with the council that they are threatening fines over lack of medical exemption for D&V; fines are not up to them and they are causing your daughter to miss more education by going to the doctors for no reason. I would also write to your MP - you need to get someone’s interest high up. Do not accept off-rolling and do not home educate - I’m assuming she is doing GCSES this academic year or next? So she needs to stay put as any disruption would hinder her chances. The exam fees are also prohibitive and if you home educate you would be liable for all.

Good luck and I hope things start to improve for her. Well done on not signing the contract. If you did, you accepting that there is an element of choice over the absence. I am assuming you are doing all you can, don’t be afraid to ask for help.

I'm an Attendance Lead (newly appointed) at a school with historically low attendance. I'm challenging this can't do culture. As a result, we've sent out over 100 attendance contracts since half term.

In terms of signing it, doesn't matter to me if you don't. I just write "parent refused to sign" on the document and carry on with it anyway. When it gets yo the penalty notice fine, not signing it just makes the parent look worse.

Moving on to illness, fo you have a medical professional willing to put in writing that this child cannot reasonably attend school more than 80%? If so, school have lots of options to support you.

However, GPs will on the whole want to promote good attendance at school. If the GP doesn't think your child's health needs warrants 1-2 school days off a week, you need to accept your child needs to attend more and figure out what the actual barrier to attending is. It takes some deep reflection on why the child isnt getting their education. Is it to do with sleep habits, rules and boundaries, behaviour issues, lack of resilience, permissive parenting, lack of assertive adults, taking the path of least resistance?

I'm an Attendance Lead (newly appointed) at a school with historically low attendance. I'm challenging this can't do culture. As a result, we've sent out over 100 attendance contracts since half term.

In terms of signing it, doesn't matter to me if you don't. I just write "parent refused to sign" on the document and carry on with it anyway. When it gets yo the penalty notice fine, not signing it just makes the parent look worse.

Moving on to illness, fo you have a medical professional willing to put in writing that this child cannot reasonably attend school more than 80%? If so, school have lots of options to support you.

However, GPs will on the whole want to promote good attendance at school. If the GP doesn't think your child's health needs warrants 1-2 school days off a week, you need to accept your child needs to attend more and figure out what the actual barrier to attending is. It takes some deep reflection on why the child isnt getting their education. Is it to do with sleep habits, rules and boundaries, behaviour issues, lack of resilience, permissive parenting, lack of assertive adults, taking the path of least resistance?

@EvilNextDoor Grow up, someone who knows their job, as that poster clearly does, probably faces uninformed keyboard warriors like you on a daily basis and will be well able to put you in your place.

OP, what you are describing doesn't sound normal for a school. If you have provided them with clear evidence of your daughters illness, they are normally very understanding. They will only act the way the way you describe if they have doubts about how true it is.

I'm an Attendance Lead (newly appointed) at a school with historically low attendance. I'm challenging this can't do culture. As a result, we've sent out over 100 attendance contracts since half term.

In terms of signing it, doesn't matter to me if you don't. I just write "parent refused to sign" on the document and carry on with it anyway. When it gets yo the penalty notice fine, not signing it just makes the parent look worse.

Moving on to illness, fo you have a medical professional willing to put in writing that this child cannot reasonably attend school more than 80%? If so, school have lots of options to support you.

However, GPs will on the whole want to promote good attendance at school. If the GP doesn't think your child's health needs warrants 1-2 school days off a week, you need to accept your child needs to attend more and figure out what the actual barrier to attending is. It takes some deep reflection on why the child isnt getting their education. Is it to do with sleep habits, rules and boundaries, behaviour issues, lack of resilience, permissive parenting, lack of assertive adults, taking the path of least resistance?

School is your first point of contact to ask, as they fill out the referral forms.

I’ve given proof of everything so I don’t understand how they could doubt it ?