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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To find a lost wallet and keep the money inside

407 replies

FindersKeepers1 · 20/11/2024 13:08

Today I found a wallet on the floor in ASDA. A decent leather, heavy wallet with credit cards inside etc. I quickly handed it into a security guard who then handed it into customer services. Told DH and he asked if I kept the money inside? He was half joking but said that he would keep the cash as a “finders fee” and that it served the boomer right for dropping their wallet (it was a wallet of an older man)

Tried to talk to him, would he really keep the money he found and he would! Although he then accused me of starting a fight.

OP posts:
muggletops · 20/11/2024 13:50

FindersKeepers1 · 20/11/2024 13:16

He steals stuff from work - not money or big items but fills his bag with supplies! I could never 👎

Filling his bag with supplies from work?! That is theft and an instant sacking offense where I work. I can imagine he is right tight wad too in all other ways, not attractive.

oakleaffy · 20/11/2024 13:50

FindersKeepers1 · 20/11/2024 13:16

He steals stuff from work - not money or big items but fills his bag with supplies! I could never 👎

He has zero morals.
What a creep.

eqpi4t2hbsnktd · 20/11/2024 13:50

No way! Somehow worse if it's an older person too... your DP is a bastard!

Wokeuptired · 20/11/2024 13:50

I just asked my husband the same question, he said no matter how skint we are he would always hand it in, and he would thing badly of someone who didn't, but he is the kind of man to park the car to help someone cross a road, and luckily our children have also grown up with great morals.
Op sorry to say that your husband doesn't come across as a nice person, doors he have any nice qualities?

MissMoneyFairy · 20/11/2024 13:48

Your stbex sounds a real scuzzy. Good decision to leave.

Tricho · 20/11/2024 13:48

your husband is absolutely disgusting and morally corrupt.

Hope this helps x

Waffle78 · 20/11/2024 13:48

No I wouldn't I've lost purses a couple of times. Once I got it back and once I didn't. So know how it feels when I don't.

JoshLymanIsHotterThanSam · 20/11/2024 13:47

Wallet-absolutely not.

Stray loose tenner randomly on the ground..yep Ill have that thank you very much.

I once saw a woman leave a tenner in a self service checkout in Asda. I took the tenner out and waited by the exit for ten minutes to see her come flying back in looking all dishevelled….and handed her the tenner back. I knew who it belonged to so it was the right thing to do to give it back.

Original poster
FindersKeepers1 · 20/11/2024 13:46

SwanRivers · 20/11/2024 13:45

And are you planning on staying married to him for the rest of your life?

Show quote history

I can’t say too many details but I’m putting together a plan to leave, it’ll just take a while.

OP posts:
AshLeaf · 20/11/2024 13:46

That might be the last cash the guy has for the rest of the month. Well done OP for handing it in. Your husband has shown that if he were presented with the opportunity he would steal - not great!

Original poster
FindersKeepers1 · 20/11/2024 13:45

IrritableVowel · 20/11/2024 13:41

In your first couple of posts, you sound shocked that he would suggest keeping it.

Your later posts about him being a thief make me wonder why you are surprised!

Fair point! I don’t know why I was so surprised! I’m a very honest person, I’ve actually walked back to a shop to pay for an item my toddler years ago squirrelled away in his pram and been honest if I’ve been given too much change.

OP posts:
SwanRivers · 20/11/2024 13:45

FindersKeepers1 · 20/11/2024 13:30

He’s the one I posted about where he encouraged our son to keep some air pods that our son found. Made out that I was a huge doormat, a nerd and pathetic for wanting to hand them in and return them to their owner. My teen called me a narcissist and vicious too, I told my husband that his behaviour is ruining our son but he’s used that as a weapon too - how I said he’s going to ruin our son with his terrible morals etc.

And are you planning on staying married to him for the rest of your life?

Inthefreakmidwinter · 20/11/2024 13:44

Definitely hand it in. I had my wallet handed back to me once with all contents in and it was so lovely.

If i find money I donate to a charity box or someone homeless. I know some MNers claim to hand £10 notes into the police which is totally nuts!

I

HumerousHumous · 20/11/2024 13:44

So, op. I think you are right, your husband is wrong to consider doing this..

HumerousHumous · 20/11/2024 13:43

I know someone who found over £1000 in cash in a department store, not far from the foreign exchange desk. They kept it. I was quite shocked that someone would do this as this is theft.

If I ever found cash or cash, I would hand it in to the police station, not hand it where found though. I would probably inform the store that money has been found and that any enquiries made to them, they should contact the police.

ilovesooty · 20/11/2024 13:42

Hoppinggreen · 20/11/2024 13:33

Your husband seems to be an unpleasant thief

And the OP is allowing him to bring up their son to have similar values.

MenopauseSucks · 20/11/2024 13:42

I'm surprised he didn't suggest taking the credit cards & using them as wellHmm

Purplecatshopaholic · 20/11/2024 13:41

Of course you don’t keep the money. And Jeezo, your DH is basically a thief. I would struggle knowing that about him. How would he feel if it was the other way round and someone took money he needed, eg for food or heating?

IrritableVowel · 20/11/2024 13:41

In your first couple of posts, you sound shocked that he would suggest keeping it.

Your later posts about him being a thief make me wonder why you are surprised!

godmum56 · 20/11/2024 13:41

FindersKeepers1 · 20/11/2024 13:14

I asked him again - would he actually steal the contents of the wallet and he basically said not if the person was standing right next to him!

my usual question then. What does he bring to the table? have you had kids with this man?

LuckySantangelo35 · 20/11/2024 13:41

Anyone who uses the term boomer is an ick as well

Chenecinquantecinq · 20/11/2024 13:40

Obviously stealing

CranberryHedgehog · 20/11/2024 13:40

Sorry OP I think I voted the wrong way. I voted YABU as in I think you would BU to take the money, but I think your question was actually the opposite. I do not think at all that YABU to hand the wallet in with the money in it. Your DH is horrible to steal the money! We have no idea what people's circumstances are and that might have been the difference between him being able to eat or not for the rest of the month.

Hickory247 · 20/11/2024 13:40

I'd never do that. I remember when I found a watch in a carpark when I was a delivery driver aged 17. I handed it in to the police station. The lady who had lost it contacted them to see if it had been handed in and they reunited her with it. She was so grateful she rang me to thank me for my kindness. It was a watch given to her by her late husband and priceless. I have never forgotten that and I am a very honest person anyway. Yes I steal the odd marker pen or bottle of tippex from work but that's a bit different.

Wheresthebeach · 20/11/2024 13:40

Usual 'hate of boomers' stuff. Quite repulsive.

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