To think this dad is being very rude and inconsiderate?

Helicopter parenting at its worst. The child has been invited along on a special day out for his friends birthday. Other parent accepted invite. An 8 year old spends all day at school without his parents and is perfectly capable of coping without them for a day with another family who I am sure are also perfectly capable of taking responsibility of another child. They are looking forward to a special treat day with their family doing something that the birthday boy wanted to do and to bring his best friend along. Best friend either goes along with family or doesn’t. Other Dad inviting himself and another child is totally unacceptable, rude and embarrassing. I think just a gentle explanation of the above very factually is all that is needed. If the other Dad chooses to take his younger son along on the same day to same place then that’s entirely up to him but it’s a shame for the older son as it’s a special treat to go out for the day with his best friend and their family. This is just so much about what’s wrong with kids these days, give your kids some space to have their own life and experiences!

DH has fuelled this, he should have said no straight away.

I can't help but wonder since he's approached your DH about it and suggested the one car than in CF Dads head it's now a boys trip. Him your DH and the three boys. I think it's next level CFery!

Cant you just say “sorry thats not possible there is no room in the car”

Maybe the other brothers dad sits with the said 6 year old on rides then it's doable

Also tye concept of sharing well maybe youf son needs yo understand that he needs to
I get it it is his birthday but he's sharing time with his own brother to

I don't think the dad is rude you are taking your other child so he prob thought he is paying for himself and other chlld what the issue.
Obviously If no space in car that's different unless he drives himself
End of the day you r going to have to havd a 2 year old who will get grisly around a theme park to

Ew, absolutely not. Nothing worse than people who are incapable of having an adult conversation and so they choose to speak through small children.

Does anyone have a 7 seater?

Please don’t do this!

...this thread is really enlightening - people's views on this are so different. He's 8 and the dad already agreed to him going to the theme park and hasnt said why hes now changing it (mark is nervous etc?) without this info it is really cheeky to invite yourself along to an event ..... I don't understand why people dont see this ? Parents who stay at parties when its not necessary and invite other siblings are annoying..let your kids have some independence, stay nearby if it nakes you feel better.
Hopefully the car thing will resolve this

At the end of the day, a theme park is a public place. The only thing you can say no to is that there isn’t space in the car. But his taking his other child there on the same day is IMO not your call to make.

It’s possible that the younger son was upset/wanted to go and he said that they could go too (which they are totally within their rights to do) and then figured that since you’re all going now you could share the ride.

So all you have to do is say that it’s great he will be taking Mark’s brother for the day, unfortunately there isn’t space for you all in the car, but you’re happy to meet up for lunch/some cake at some point.

Job done.

So you'd take them somewhere separate, not invite yourselves!

If one of my children was going to Alton towers then the other one wouldn't be sitting at home. But saying that, I'd expect to keep the other son separate as he wasn't invited to the 'party'.

OP, I’m totally with you. Your son invited his bestie, and that should be it - the friend can either accept or decline. End of story. A parent wanting to tag along with an extra kid is just CF. If the Dad wants (separately) to take his other child to the theme park, that’s up to him, but you invited one child. As for the car thing, words fail me!

He did not literally "insist", but he did make the request in front of his young child, which puts the onus on the other person of saying no and disappointing said child rather than this dad having a spine and doing it himself.

Really? I mean really? If the younger one gets upset so what? Doubt the older brother will care as he’s there with his friend so it won’t impact on anyone’s fun. The dad can sort out the younger sibling if he’s upset. Genuinely can’t see on any level how it will ruin the day and I think people who get overly hung up on this stuff just enjoy complaining.

I think as you're bringing your own younger child anyway, does it really make a difference?
Mark will still be going on the rides with your DS presumably, and maybe it'll make it easier to entertain the 2 little ones if they're together?

Surely it's because he's thinking mark is too young to be going without a parent?

However I have no idea why he assumed it was OK to hijack your car! Things Like that annoy me..

@CarrotPencil is correct if it is about not wanting to let 8 year old with the family then compromise is that he finds a babysitter for younger child and then that way can support his older son on the rides.

But it's a public theme park. You can't ban people from going on the same day as you are.
You can say no to all the fitting in one car though, say you've only space for Mark

Exactly. His son is 8, and you don’t seem to know his family that well from the description of the interaction and the fact you don’t want him in the same large theme park as you for a few hours. Maybe he knows that his son might prefer it if he was there too. It’s a long drive there - not sure I’d have liked that at age 8/9, spending the whole day with another persons family.

@Startinganew32 that logic wouldn't work as if the requirements are children have to ride with an adult each then the two dads can't take 3 kids on. Or op ends up looking after a 2 year old and another kid who is told they can't go on the ride.

Yes the sibling could go on with dad for rides, but op has said younger sibling has got upset at being left out before so there is a chance sibling will get upset at always having to sit with dad and then older kids are made to be nice and take turns.

If the dad isn't comfortable with his kid going alone that's a different story and the dad should explain this.

I expect op has done her research and knows if the kids are tall enough to go on rides themselves as otherwise they wouldn't be able to take their own 2 year old and go on rides with both kids if that is the requirement.

😱 omg absolutely not. Maybe I’m neurotic! No way. But then my 9yo 1) doesn’t have a phone and 2) will be all confident and then suddenly get scared i) in a big place ii) on rides.

Op I think friend’s dad is unreasonable to bring sibling but I do understand wanting to go along with a child that age. Does Mark actually like/have experience with rollercoasters etc? Lots of kids won’t at that age. I assume there’s a reason Mark’s sibling can’t be left with his mother so I won’t suggest that as that would be the obvious first solution.

If it was me (and it has been me in the past, done Legoland with best friend for bday a few times), one of us would stay home with younger child and then the 2 boys each have a parent go with them. In one car 😁 Bit awkward if the parents aren’t friends though!

Maybe the other dad isn't happy about his son going or is concerned about this behaviour & wants to keep an eye on him a bit? Perhaps there will be some rides for the older ones separately so they can still have fun on them?