To ask nursery not to let my child play outside when it’s dark out

What do you think children have done down the decades? They need to get used to life or else they will end up as hot house flowers. Let him play outside. Tell him to put on his hat and gloves and coat and leave it at that. It toughens them up and gives them a sense of day and night, winter and summer and develops their senses playing in the dark.

Nursery are doing that so they can tidy up the toys inside while the kids are outside so they can leave on time instead of tidying up after the last kid has left dead on closing time. If they comply with your request they'd have to have a member of staff inside with your child, I would bet they wouldn't have enough staff at that time of evening to facilitate that so it would mean they have to keep all the kids in his class in.
I think you should just ask that they put his hat and gloves on, however surely the garden area is lit if they are going there in the dark? Staff need to be able to see the children all the time they arent complying with guidelines if they are taking kids out where they can't see them. Id not allow my child to be in a nursery where they take children where there isn't enough light to actually supervise, heard too many horror stories on my early years training.

The message is not confusing.
At nursery you do x, y, z.
and at home...

Teaching them that different situations have different 'rules' is far better for them than trying to control every environment they are in so that it's exactly like you do it at home.

Playing in the dark is fun. Being in fresh air is better than being stuck in a germ filled room.

BUT not dressing your kid appropriately isn’t acceptable.
does he have a puddle suit? A snow suit?
they definitely should be telling him to put it on .
and you should be practicing at home to make sure he can.

Where I am, the children wouldn't play outside more than half the year if parents kept them inside in the dark. He's not alone on a dirt road. YABU.

If he gets cold, bring warmer clothes!

*Livinglifetoday · Today 08:26

Of course a young child should be outside supervised in the dark especially when there is adequate lighting. I wouldn't be happy with a 3 yr old playing outside in the dark if I couldn't see them. I still think this is what the OP is referring to, especially if there are areas in the nursery garden where there is poor lighting. There would have to be floodlights throughout & we don't know if that's the case in this Nursery.

Tge Op literally says what the problem is.

1. The child gets cold. Op needs to make sure he has a hat and gloves and possibly a buff Like other parents do. I would also be telling my child, in this situation to have lots of fun playing with their friends.

2 op doesn't allow her child to play out at home in the dark. Thi is fair enough .For this she just tells child that nursery and schools have different rules.
You are just reading things that aren't there.

I don't let my kids in the garden in the dark as it's very poorly lit, has steep steps and I can't see if the foxes have shit on the lawn. I assume none of those are an issue at nursery. My children were always fine with different rules at different places, even when tiny.

I don’t take my 2.5 year old out in dark (yet) mainly because by that time of day we’re on dinner/wind down. But no issue with nursery doing this. Get him outdoors gear. He needs it irrespective of time of day. I think you’d make your little boy quite miserable if all his friends are out to play and he’s got to stay inside. There will be lots of things you do differently to nursery. Kids understand different people places different rules

😂

I really don't think OP is suggesting her child never participates in outside activities while supervised in the dark. There was minimal light in our garden in the winter at night.We could switch on flood lights but there were still areas further away (large garden next to a pitched black field) that weren't suitable for a young child to be left alone.

Of course she is, she’s literally complaining about him being in a supervised nursery garden.

Op not only will the nursery think you’re nuts, but this will not be easy to accommodate. As much as possible nurseries generally get coats on and kids play outside at the end of the day as it’s easier for home time since all the kids are already ready.

Your child will have to learn that there are different rules in different settings, it’s not just the dark garden rule. Kids are adaptable.

😂 if you want a childcare regime specific to your needs then get a nanny. Baffled as to why this is an issue.

🤣🤣

I regularly take DD to the part at 5-6pm.

It's my responsibility as per parents to make sure she's dressed appropriately for the colder nights.

YABU, do your job properly and send your child in with appropriate clothing rather than alienating them to be kept inside.

Of course a young child should be outside supervised in the dark especially when there is adequate lighting. I wouldn't be happy with a 3 yr old playing outside in the dark if I couldn't see them. I still think this is what the OP is referring to, especially if there are areas in the nursery garden where there is poor lighting. There would have to be floodlights throughout & we don't know if that's the case in this Nursery.

Appropriately supervised outdoor play in the dark is fine and healthy. Children are good at adapting and understanding that different places have different rules, I.e. he can play outside after dark at nursery but not in the park, if that’s something you don’t want to do.

You wouldn’t be at all unreasonable to insist to your son’s nursery that he has to be properly dressed, including hat and gloves.

Children often have cold extremities, but if their necks are warm, their body heat is good. This kept me sane when I had a young child determined to live in shorts, t-shirt & jumper and hated being bundled up in layers. Active children run hot. They want to feel things with their hands, not through gloves and it's good for their learning; their hand-eye co-ordination, their proprioception, and sensory exoloring of the world.

Playing in a safe nursery garden in the dark is a total non-issue. It is an environment designed for young children, risk assessed and well managed.

We've always gone about our business as usual in the winter months. We walked home from nursery and school, and to/from evening activities. Fortunately the neighbourhood is pretty dozy so it's safe to use the local playground in the dark. We go out on walks for things like stargazing or bat spotting. We go to groups like scouting where there's lots of outdoor activities all year round and the children love the adventures in the dark by torchlight.

There was a thread last night about people's self-imposed curfews in the dark. It's very sad and limiting that a significant minority of women don't go out in the dark, even at functional times like 4pm. It's sensible to consider the environment (I'd rather not run into low branches or trip on roots in a dark, unlit wood), but to have a blanket vetoing on doing anything outside in the dark is not a healthy way to live.

I really don't think OP is suggesting her child never participates in outside activities while supervised in the dark. There was minimal light in our garden in the winter at night.We could switch on flood lights but there were still areas further away (large garden next to a pitched black field) that weren't suitable for a young child to be left alone.
I think she is tbh. She hadn't talked about the safety aspect, just that her kid is freezing, which is her fault. She also says its a confusing message as she doesn't allow her child to play outside when she's at home
Every child knows there's different rules at different places, whether you are at school,your nans or best friend's house there are different expectations.

Goodness me OP, I guess the fact you have not come back with a reply means you now realise how ridiculous you are being?

I really don't think OP is suggesting her child never participates in outside activities while supervised in the dark. There was minimal light in our garden in the winter at night.We could switch on flood lights but there were still areas further away (large garden next to a pitched black field) that weren't suitable for a young child to be left alone.

Wow🤦🏼‍♀️
Some of the best memories we can make is running outside in the dark to play in the snow!
You are being ridiculous

Hmmm by this logic is it ok 👍 for they keep your child outside playing at 11pm in June?
Quite an odd rule

@ImJustAGirlInACountrySong
Op said 'when it's black outside'....black!! What does that even mean?? Bloody weird

It is a very common expression where I live. Another is 'it's pitch black outside' ( pitch meaning tar which is black in colour)
The op means outside is very dark. Not sure why it's weird, especially this time of year! 🙄

You know you are being utterly ridiculous right??

Send your child in adequate clothing!! It's not 'confusing' at all (you might be 'confused' but 'the message', whatever that means, won't be confusing! All nurseries spend as much time outdoors as possible, at all times of year...so you, the parent, need to provide the right type of clothing for this ffs!! 🤦‍♀️)

Get a grip.

OP, if you're still reading, please don't limit your son's development. You might have good reasons for not allowing him in your garden after dark but the nursery garden will be different. I had a child who would never wear a hat or gloves but they have grown up very healthily. It's hard to play in gloves anyway. Pop him in an extra warm vest and joggers.

My DC loved a "dark picnic" in the garden when it wasn't too cold for sitting still. A string or two of fairy lights and/or some lanterns made it more magical.

When he is a bit older, find a place without street lights on a clear night. Take a rug and lie down to watch the stars. It is literally awesome.

Go for a walk in December to see all the Christmas lights. It was a Christmas Eve tradition in our family right up to teens.

If there is anywhere near you that does night time nature activities take him along. Badger watching, bat watching, that sort of thing.

Embrace the dark, there is too much of it to hide away indoors all the time.

What is your problem with being out in the dark OP?