For texting fighting neighbours?

No one should have to sit in their own home having to listen to their own TV/music turned up to an uncomfortable loudness due to inconsiderate people next door having a slanging match.

Once a neighbours behaviour starts to affect yours and your families own immediate environment they've made it your business to interfer.

100% agree with this. I grew up witnessing my mum abuse my dad for 20 years.No one believed it as she played the victim and had him arrested for violence she inflicted upon herself. It came out years later. It’s a shame when people automatically believe it’s always the woman being abused, there should be more awareness for this. It really messed me up, when children are involved it’s everyone’s business.

As someone who works with abused victims I can tell you actually it's statistically more likely that the woman is the abuser. But women do it differently to men. Women will act like they're being abused shout and scream "stop it your hurting me" etc make comments to friends that imply they're being abused and hurt themselves so they've got evidence. And then emotionally abuse their male partner and make it so they don't tell anyone "because who would ever believe that a man is being abused"
However; it's statistically more likely that a man will face legal action than women!

This and obviously no woman could ever be the abusive partner!

My friend was being physically and emotionally abused by his wife a neighbour went to speak to his wife when he left for work one day thinking he was hitting her. It made it 100x worse because she then beat him so bad he ended in hospital as punishment for "being a little loud bitch and not taking things quietly"

Just put some music on or turn the TV up. This is none of your business so keep out if they manage to resolve their issues you will not be in favour if you interfer.

I agree with @Trumptonagain @MissKittyFantastico84 . They may not realise the sound is escalating along with their rows. I think it is entirely appropriate to have a gentle chat along lines of ‘sorry to bring this personal stuff up but last night we could hear xxx in my son’s room and he was asking questions so we moved him. I absolutely don’t want to pry but just wanted to let you know we can hear’ as opposed to ‘keep the noise down, blah blah’ which is also true but somewhat insensitive. Difficult one!

As its a regular thing and your son is now asking questions I would 100% tell them that it is not acceptable and next time you will contact 101.
In fact, record what you can hear so they are fully aware of the level they are reaching and send that to them.

If they have children you should be reporting it anyway.

@Chaseandstatus women can be abusers too. Whether heterosexual or not. Infact many men are abused by women and there are plenty of same sex relationships that are abusive.

Depending on what you’re hearing, if you’re concerned for the welfare of the child, you ought to call the police. If this is a DV situation, then putting it on the group chat is only likely to worsen the situation for the victim.

My first concern would be that everyone's safe.

Their kids yes, and with that in mind I would have knocked on the door to check on everyone - in the hope that it jolted them out of their fight. I wish someone had done that when I was a child in a very volatile household.

Why would it be different if they're not a heterosexual couple?

What? Abuse is not gender specific and can be perpetrated by either partner. It also comes in many forms... not just domestic violence.

Just because you and your husband does not behave "like that" at this point doesn't mean anything in the great scheme of absurdity we call life... Sounds like they are going through something much more serious... Stay out of it.

Certainly not in a group chat!! Private message making them aware that it's awkward to listen to them

You need to stay out of this, it's none of your business.

@Randomrover has put it perfectly, contact the police who have the training and can speak to your neighbours. As a child raised in a household where massive arguments occured, it absolutely had a detrimental effect on me .

Or the man it's not just women who are abused

Don't tell your other neighbours. If you are concerned and can't my put your child to sleep in another room, speak to one of the arguing neighbours in the day when things are quiet. If you become concerned about violence occurring, phone the police. Otherwise stay out of it.

I definitely wouldn't txt and say I think it's unacceptable, that doesn't sound helpful. I'd ask her if she's doing okay if I saw her, and if you hear again where there is banging and possible violence I'd call police.

I wouldn’t interfere by texting, you don’t know the full situation and the woman (or man) could be at risk of violence. Try and catch her alone and ask if she’s ok, woman to woman she may open up knowing you have heard the fights and needs someone to confide in. If it continues I’d be considering calling the police, it’ll make them aware you hear it all and may also get them the help they need.

I’d not get so blatantly and directly involved in their business. By acknowledging their row openly you’re acknowledging the how far the boundary has stretched, to the outside world, so once they’ve overcome any embarrassment they will be ok going there again, and further, as the trend continues.
As a responsible adult you have a safeguarding duty to any child being subjected to domestic abuse of any kind, as recognised in law. This applies to their children and yours.
You may hear thumping and banging but you can’t see what or who is being slammed, pinned, pinched or punched. Or what’s being conveyed in their expressions, the whispered threats or the tears. They are possibly horrified by what’s becoming their reality. Embarrassment could easily become the fckit trigger for one to go scorch earth on their relationship.
They need an objective outsider with some authority to gain their attention and bring them up to speed with where they are and how quickly it can go past the point of no return. They can choose to remember the person they fell in love with, married and created a family with as they brought another little person into this already troubled world.
Let the police be the reality check, they are trained to navigate the process and address any safeguarding concerns. You be you, wife, mother, neighbour.
Where there are kids involved, please, don’t hesitate. These memories will shape their young lives and last a lifetime. It is a call for 999.
Anyone hearing them could call for an intervention, you don’t have to let the her know it was you to make the call. Your identity will be withheld as a third party in the event of a data subject access request.

@Chaseandstatusignore you're stuck in my @
@Isittimeformynapyet my wife the abuser

I don't know. Give us a clue...

When my neighbours are having a row I put my music on a quick blast really loud or turn my TV up - it's my way of telling them I can hear them and usually it goes quiet lol

I'd be worried about the impact of their own children being exposed to these arguments. It doesn't matter if they don't become physical, they're still experiencing domestic abuse.