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AIBU?

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Original poster

His GF asked him not to visit our kids anymore

163 replies

Twinkiebinkieseven · 18/11/2024 19:24

Hi all,

Just pondering. So the ex is in a relationship. His GF threatened to end things if he didn't stop seeing the kids at mines which he's been doing for the last few years about every 4-6 weeks. We only had this arrangement because he moved 3 hours away.

So now, the kids will see their dad a handful of times a year now.

I feel pretty angry about it TBF and can't believe he would choose her over his kids. I'm struggling to stay amicable. AIBU to think he's a terrible dad or am I unreasonable?
Fyi - I really don't care that he's in a relationship as he was a horrible partner but anything that hurts my kids, hurts me.

OP posts:
gotchaintheribs · 18/11/2024 19:48

I asked because if he had choice like it was because it was the only job job he could get, sick parents, another child with someone else previously, couldn't afford the same area, restraining order, had a mental breakdown and his family and friends are where he moved back too. So it does matter why. If it's simply because he moved for another new woman then this is all on him and he should be making the trip to keep a relationship with his kids. Or even if OP was willing if every 6 weeks or so she took the kids to him on a Friday and he brought them back in a Sunday night

User364837 · 18/11/2024 19:45

That’s awful ☹️
although it sounds like she’s not objecting to him seeing the kids as much as him coming and spending time at your house

Original poster
Twinkiebinkieseven · 18/11/2024 19:44

@Wellingtonspiegood shout

OP posts:
5475878237NC · 18/11/2024 19:43

It doesn't matter why he moved away. He could easily take them out for the day somewhere local to you and then return them home. Are they not old enough to stay a long weekend with him at the half and end of terms?

I don't think his girlfriend has anything to do with this really.

gotchaintheribs · 18/11/2024 19:41

Why did he move 3 hours away?

Tittat50 · 18/11/2024 19:37

Dear goodness, he's a disgrace. Is he actually agreeing to this. It's possible he's making it up because he can't be bothered.

Please tell us he is paying via CMS. You have nothing to lose by going via them for all the financial support you can get.

One day he will regret it. I don't know if that helps. But one day he really will. And it will be too late.

Ponderingwindow · 18/11/2024 19:35

He was already a man who was willing to move 3 hours away from his children.

he was already a man who was willing to only see his children every 4-6 weeks.

if this decision really comes from his girlfriend, they are a perfect match.

sorry your children have to put up with this feckless excuse for a father.

User8563029648123578 · 18/11/2024 19:35

This is nothing to do with his GF, it’s entirely his choice. If he was a decent father he would just stay over somewhere locally and see his kids all weekend. Or tell her no. Or not have moved 3 hours away.

Hes a piece of shit and your kids deserve better.

StormingNorman · 18/11/2024 19:34

What a shit excuse of a man. I’m sorry OP.

sassyduck · 18/11/2024 19:32

He's a terrible dad. He doesn't deserve any kind of relationship with his children. I hope you get every penny you're entitled to for them.

Berga · 18/11/2024 19:30

If he only sees them every 4-6 weeks, so once a month or less, surely he could just pick them up and take them out for the day?

The GF might be requesting this, but he doesn't have to agree. Or he could find some middle ground. But it's all up to him.

ForSharpPearlSheep · 18/11/2024 19:30

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

Wellingtonspie · 18/11/2024 19:26

His a useless sperm donor. I hope he pays?

Also keep the text or email or whatever where he openly says he can’t come because his girlfriend says so. As proof for when he tries to spin it at some point.