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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Play Dates Last 2 Hrs Max

41 replies

SunshineAfterTheRainR · 17/11/2024 17:36

If you were invited to a play date for your child at their friend’s house, the expectation would be that you’d stay 2 hours max right?! This has alllllways been the unspoken rule I’ve noticed and become accustomed to. So, friend invites you over for 1pm, you let them play until 2.45ish and then start packing up and saying you must be off and head out the door for 3pm (or earlier is fine). I’ve just had to give a MOUNTAIN of hints to a parent still here at 5pm and it was exhausting getting them out of the door. They were hinting to stay for dinner. AIBU expecting them to have left after two hours?

OP posts:
FeelingSoOverwhelmed · 17/11/2024 17:53

truegum81 · 17/11/2024 17:47

Do you and the other parents all work full time? How old are the children? Is your partner around?

Oh come on… sunday play dates aren’t commonplace

more like long standing / close friends with kids coming over for lunch and the kids play together.

Confused at Sunday playdates not being common? When your kids are at school and everyone is working when else do they get to see their friends? We're not all lucky enough to work part time!

To answer the OP, yes I'd find 4 hours on a Sunday a bit much unless I was already good friends with the parent. Id probably have said directly we needed to get on with stuff though, I am direct, not a hint dropper!

truegum81 · 17/11/2024 17:52

Are you friends with the parent? are they a single parent by any chance?

SunshineAfterTheRainR · 17/11/2024 17:51

Just one and their parent

OP posts:
truegum81 · 17/11/2024 17:49

SunshineAfterTheRainR · 17/11/2024 17:40

Age 5. I would’ve been happy for them to drop off, also happy for them to stay - whatever they’re most comfy with. However, when they stay and expect me to entertain and chat with them for hourrrrrrs and don’t make moves to leave, I find it too much.

are you friends with the parent?

SunshineAfterTheRainR · 17/11/2024 17:49

No I didn’t do lunch, they actually said they were having lunch with a club just before and suggested 1pm (we live just around the corner from it). So I made sure to feed mine first. When they came, I offered lots of drinks and snacks though. I thought they’d be gone by 3 anyway. Then I was expecting to do dinner for 5 but they were still here. I hinted SO much it was getting dark, I’d need to be doing dinner now, it was getting late, checking the time and on and on… they just didn’t move.

OP posts:
truegum81 · 17/11/2024 17:48

You invited people over at 1pm on a Sunday

No lunch?!

truegum81 · 17/11/2024 17:48

how old are the children?

truegum81 · 17/11/2024 17:47

PeloMom · 17/11/2024 17:45

Why is a play date on Sunday weird? Certainly play dates are out of school hours/days,no? And most extracurricular activities are on saturdays (with some exceptions).

Do you and the other parents all work full time? How old are the children? Is your partner around?

Oh come on… sunday play dates aren’t commonplace

more like long standing / close friends with kids coming over for lunch and the kids play together.

PeloMom · 17/11/2024 17:47

OP re timing I agree- after 2 hrs everyone starts losing steam. 1.5-2 hrs is the unspoken rule for that age here too
also for 1pm start time I assume they’ve had lunch; kids typically have lunch 12 (at school, nursery). I’d serve small snacks at that time but not lunch

PeloMom · 17/11/2024 17:45

truegum81 · 17/11/2024 17:43

That in itself is weird!

to me!

Edited

Why is a play date on Sunday weird? Certainly play dates are out of school hours/days,no? And most extracurricular activities are on saturdays (with some exceptions).

truegum81 · 17/11/2024 17:44

did you serve lunch?

truegum81 · 17/11/2024 17:43

That in itself is weird!

to me!

SunshineAfterTheRainR · 17/11/2024 17:41

Yup!

OP posts:
truegum81 · 17/11/2024 17:40

a play date on a Sunday?!

SunshineAfterTheRainR · 17/11/2024 17:40

Age 5. I would’ve been happy for them to drop off, also happy for them to stay - whatever they’re most comfy with. However, when they stay and expect me to entertain and chat with them for hourrrrrrs and don’t make moves to leave, I find it too much.

OP posts:
minipie · 17/11/2024 17:38

What age? Sounds like quite young if parent is staying too. Yes about 2 hours is normal when little.

I do think weekend playdates are a bit different though and it definitely gets longer as they get older