SAHM + Nanny

Ignore, ignore, ignore OP. I had a nanny when I had a toddler and a baby and on mat leave for 14 months. I had the odd snide remark from my MIL but it isn’t a race to the bottom. If it’s what you want then stuff what anyone else thinks!

Who wouldn’t want an extra pair of hands when looking after 2 little ones??

We can never stop what people think of us but we can manage how we react. So many people will have an opinion but what they think really doesn't matter a jot. Clearly people are jealous of your life. It's a them problem for sure!

And do they want a medal.

You can afford help.
That's what money is for.

No different to sending te older one to nursery whilst on maternity leave. Which I did, and plenty others I know do.

I'd have definitely done this if I could afforded it. I still sent my eldest to nursery when my dc2 was born though as I found a toddler and a baby so tough.

It wouldn’t be for me because I would not like someone else in my personal space (other than my husband) but it’s moot anyway because I couldn’t afford it! However, you do what works for you and your family - certainly makes it easier for your toddler to enjoy activities that are unsuitable for a baby. And gives you chance to have one on one time with both children. People always love an opinion but just ignore it!

They are as jealous as sin. Tell them to take a long walk off a short pier.

You and your family are happy with your nanny who you trust and who you describe as a member of your family.

You know when they say if something is not broke, don't fix it.........well just keep things as they are because its working for your family and its nothing to do with any one else.

Its no different to keeping the older child in childcare while on maternity leave. And being able to have time to yourself is no different to grandparents, aunts and uncles etc doing childcare while parents do a spa day, date night, go to the gym etc etc. Loads of people near me regularly get time to themselves at least weekly to do this. Its no different to you having the nanny.

Why would you lose a good nanny and have to go to the trouble and expense of hiring a new nanny for the sake of 6 months, during which most parents could do with a bit of extra help anyway (the newborn phase)? Given you can easily afford her to stay, why would you make life much more difficult for your family (including your older DC) in this way?

If you can afford it my goodness why not.
That nanny is probably replacing what grandma's and aunts and whoever would have helped out with in the past.

I was a sahm for 10 years if I could have afforded a nanny it would have been amazing.
The perfect set up! The children are always with me but there is that extra pair of hands and most importantly eyes.
Also with two dc so close in age there is no way I would have coped alone.
You do what is right for you op and your children.

It’s fine! Do what works for you and others can do what works for them.

You're building a relationship between your children and the nanny so it will be a smooth transition when you do go back to work. They are jealous

They’re just jealous. Use as much help as you can afford. A one year age gap is hardcore

They're jealous. It happens everywhere, at every level of social class.

When we were in a rougher area, I got stick for, believe it or not, buying pre-chopped veggies instead of doing it myself!

Now, I've just hired a housekeeper for a few hours a day and DSs friends parents seem outraged and very curious 😂 My real friends of course are happy for me that life is getting a little easier.

So many people seem focused on a race to the bottom and making parenthood as hard as humanly possible!

Bit of jealousy that's all. Perhaps they were a bit shocked you can afford it. Personally I didn't put either of mine into childcare but again my choice

You have weird, judgmental friends.

1. It's absolutely fine to get whatever help you want when you have a child/children.
2. If you let her go while you were on mat leave there is a high chance she'd get another job, which would mean that you'd have to find someone else when you go back to work. This would be especially hard on your eldest who's had to adjust to having mummy again not nanny, then sharing mummy with a sibling, then having no more mummy, but a new nanny (who he also has to share). I'd definately keep the nanny if I could afford it.

I don’t see logic in firing a nanny then finding a new one. Esp if use an agency, you would not save much money.
The remedy- just smile & change the subject. Pity those people who can’t control what comes out of their mouths.

I'm sat here MANIFESTING this kind of life problem 😄😄

It's fine girl, people are just jealous and lashing out. If they could switch places with you, they would in a heartbeat!

Kids need a mum who is sane and happy and it sounds like your nanny is a fantastic help ❤️

Keep going, living a good life and just ignore them!

My life plan is literally to work hard enough to be able to live in westminster, central London with my little girl, a la bridget jones 🥰🥰

You're not a SAHM though are you? You're on MAT leave.

I raised 3 under 5 by myself as a SAHM & I was stressed as fuck. If I could have afforded it a nanny would have been an absolute god send. They’re jealous, that’s all.