The lamb steaks …

The answer to that is “ isn’t it exciting, I hope one day is cold meats and baked potatoes - remind me to pack some of that pickle I like - but other than that I am all agog for the culinary surprises.”

Absolutely this. Let him do some of the ideas/planning/work. If he wants to eat something that you haven't already got in, he should fetch it.

I'm in my 50s and have already got to the fed up of thinking what to eat EVERY single day...it's OK for myself but to have to do it for another adult as well.

My stock answer now is, what do you fancy, great I'm looking forward to eating it. Got to about 50/50 cooking but still 80/20 me doing the thinking about it....

Hang on, your major complaint here is that you don't want to have the relentless task of Thinking About and Planning the meals. He's thought about it and come up with a plan. Surely that's a good thing?

As I read this thread I asked my husband what he fancies for dinner tonight. The answer? Fish.
I am now sharing your irrational (rational?!) rage

If you are away in someone else's house, wint they will be doing the bulk of the meal planning? Helping out on the day, sure, everyone can pitch in, but the planning isn't down to you.

Tell your husband you have no idea what you will be eating the rest of the time, but it's not your problem and you are very much looking forward to not having to base your whole day around what is for dinner.

And repeat when appropriate.

Weirdly Op I have this problem in reverse, my DP cooks and gets unhappy when I say I'll just have soup. I have no idea why

I know EXACTLY what you mean OP. Interrupted your thoughts with boring shit about an effing dinner with the expectation that you’ll be cooking it. I often think there’s so much more to me than being the one who cooks the dinners. Shut up about it and let’s do something exciting

If you don't own any lamb steaks at this point on a Sunday, the butchers are all closed so you are (he is) going to have to get them from a supermarket. They quite often have them in the M&S Dine in for £15 offer so why not send him there to get the Gastropub meal deal (if they don't have any lamb left they're bound to have something else he likes) - the beauty of which it's all simple enough stuff for him to cook them himself, which is then a gateway for him cooking regularly from now on.

It makes sense to eat messy things over the sink. I ate a mango in the bath once.

so then your counter to that is "I'm having beans on toast" and leave it at that. Unless his idea sounds tasty, and you then say "great, what are you making to go with it?"

In reality you need to have a conversation about this, if it's irritating you.

I love food and cooking but it is relentless and sometimes when I am on my own I do stand over the sink and eat of a packet ....

Sorry OP but limited sympathy from me too. This could all be solved with a calm conversation. Your martyrdom doesn’t need to continue.

You say he pulls his weight. Is there a way you can share the cooking (alternate days?) and in return you alternate days on one of 'his' jobs? Just explain that you're really really fed up of cooking and need a break from it. If he refuses/makes excuses then start off with alternate days having soup/a sandwich/boiled egg etc. If he moans he'll have to go hungry or will end up cooking for himself anyway.

Saw this on instagram and it made me laugh - why is marriage hard - food.
https://www.instagram.com/p/C_-fo_YO95x/

If he's suggesting it he cooks it

Men like this are entitled wankers and only seem to worsen with age.

I feel like this already and I'm only 42! Hate the brain space food takes up every single day

Embrace your new awakened self.
He'll survive with eggs and beans for dinner if that's what you want to cook.

I'm wondering if you're my mum! 🤣

My dad insists on a proper meal every night. They love each other very much - and I love then both - but I can't bear to watch her serve his every need way into her 70s.

Having said that she's barely had to work in her adult life, whereas I'm running myself ragged trying to pay my half of the bills while raising children etc. Theres no right answer really

Of course you don't have to do anything of the sort. You say 'I'm sure they've got it all in hand. I'm not going to be interfering, it's their house. I'm looking forward to someone else worrying about all that for once. Whatever they've planned I'm sure it will be delightful' and cut that shit off at the knees.

This is a weird one to snap on. If he'd randomly said " I really fancy Indonesian Rijstafel" then that would involve spending a full day prepping and planning. But lamb steaks involves one decision "mash, new potatoes or roast?" and opening the fridge/freezer/larder to see what vegetables are in there and whether you CBA to do anything more fancy than frozen peas.

By all means pass the potato decision and prepping on to him though.

"Why you?" Because you choose to.

I don't, my DH and I cook and meal plan equally.

If you don't want meat, two veg and gravy, don't make it. Tell him to make it himself or make yourself something else.

You don't automatically owe your husband a British dinner.