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AIBU?

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Original poster

DP ignores my texts when he's out drinking - had enough

44 replies

terracottacountryfarm · 16/11/2024 23:01

Long story short, DP turns into a situationist when he's drinking. He gets embarrassing drunk. Never answers his phone when I'm supposed to pick him up, or will delay the time and then expect me to pick him up at 3am - calling me at stupid hours waking me up. I'm exhausted by it. Haven't heard from him since 3pm (he went out to watch the football).

We've split up before over this. I've text him already that I'll pick him up at half 11, as we agreed he'd come home before 12, and we are having breakfast with his mum tomorrow morning.

Another note, he has decided to go out drinking on 23rd and 24th December this year and didn't inform me about 23rd, I already knew about the 24th as this is a yearly thing, but I was incredibly pissed off that I'll be spending not one, but now two days before Xmas at home on my own.

AIBU

OP posts:
Waterboatlass · 16/11/2024 23:34

Why are you carrying on with the picking him up nonsense if he stays out late each time?

If you don't want to be with such a heavy and habitual drinker that's fine. But don't expect him to change. Cut your losses.

SweetSakura · 16/11/2024 23:31

Stop picking him up?

ByQuaintAzureWasp · 16/11/2024 23:29

I had a husband that went out drinking on w4/12 ... a yearly event ... it was just awful!
...

Gogogo12345 · 16/11/2024 23:29

terracottacountryfarm · 16/11/2024 23:01

Long story short, DP turns into a situationist when he's drinking. He gets embarrassing drunk. Never answers his phone when I'm supposed to pick him up, or will delay the time and then expect me to pick him up at 3am - calling me at stupid hours waking me up. I'm exhausted by it. Haven't heard from him since 3pm (he went out to watch the football).

We've split up before over this. I've text him already that I'll pick him up at half 11, as we agreed he'd come home before 12, and we are having breakfast with his mum tomorrow morning.

Another note, he has decided to go out drinking on 23rd and 24th December this year and didn't inform me about 23rd, I already knew about the 24th as this is a yearly thing, but I was incredibly pissed off that I'll be spending not one, but now two days before Xmas at home on my own.

AIBU

Well don't pick him up. And why on earth would you be sat indoors on your own? Why can't you go out?

Wolfiefan · 16/11/2024 23:21

He doesn’t turn into anything. He is a problem drinker. Make him someone else’s problem.

TheChosenTwo · 16/11/2024 23:20

He sounds like a selfish teenager. If dh ever expected me to get up and go and pick him up from the pub ever I’d laugh down the phone at him and hang up.
He’s working and earning, if he can afford to go out and get drunk he can afford to get himself a taxi home.
How have you allowed yourself to get into this terrible situation?

Wasywasydoodah · 16/11/2024 23:20

just don’t pick him up. Turn phone to silent. Don’t text him. Job done. Don’t lock him out though.

amispeakingintongues · 16/11/2024 23:18

He has a drinking problem.

Original poster
terracottacountryfarm · 16/11/2024 23:14

Blueberrymuffin8 · 16/11/2024 23:08

What does he do to better your life on a daily basis?

He's loving, sweet and caring. But it's when he drinks, he becomes this unreliable stupid drunk idiot who thinks of no one else but himself. Can't stand it.

OP posts:
Blueberrymuffin8 · 16/11/2024 23:08

What does he do to better your life on a daily basis?

Original poster
terracottacountryfarm · 16/11/2024 23:08

Oh don't worry - I won't be picking him up. I also have a slight urge to lock him out too..

OP posts:
InWalksBarberalla · 16/11/2024 23:08

If you split up with him before over this why are you back with him when he hasn't changed? Get rid.

IDespairOfTheHumanRace · 16/11/2024 23:06

Get rid of the twat - your life will be immeasurably happier, calmer, less stressful and altogether more enjoyable without a drinker in it!

WorldKeepsSpinningRound · 16/11/2024 23:05

You don’t sound happy. Do you truly think this guy is the right match for you?

SabreIsMyFave · 16/11/2024 23:05

If you have no children together, dump his ass immediately.

Teacherprebaby · 16/11/2024 23:04

terracottacountryfarm · 16/11/2024 23:01

Long story short, DP turns into a situationist when he's drinking. He gets embarrassing drunk. Never answers his phone when I'm supposed to pick him up, or will delay the time and then expect me to pick him up at 3am - calling me at stupid hours waking me up. I'm exhausted by it. Haven't heard from him since 3pm (he went out to watch the football).

We've split up before over this. I've text him already that I'll pick him up at half 11, as we agreed he'd come home before 12, and we are having breakfast with his mum tomorrow morning.

Another note, he has decided to go out drinking on 23rd and 24th December this year and didn't inform me about 23rd, I already knew about the 24th as this is a yearly thing, but I was incredibly pissed off that I'll be spending not one, but now two days before Xmas at home on my own.

AIBU

But ....you're doing it, you're putting up with it...so what are you going to do, continue to do it and complain?

SallyForf · 16/11/2024 23:04

Why not give yourself the best Christmas present of the decade and tell him to get lost for ever.

Scutterbug · 16/11/2024 23:03

I’d just send a text saying you are going to bed and go get a taxi home. Then put your phone on silent.
Going out 23rd and 24th is a bit unfair. Can you arrange to see friends/family at the same time?

ShowerOfShites · 16/11/2024 23:03

You know we're all going to state the obvious regarding you picking him up, right?

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