People with more than one child, be honest…

Well it will be expensive with that kinds of lifestyle

2 was hard but not because it was 2, he was a really difficult baby so it would have been hard regardless. He just never stopped crying and it was relentless.
Definitely didn't just slip in to family life and DH and I did a lot of divide and conquer for a while or DS1 would've missed out.

If I have another life. I would either have only one child or none.

We only have two. Personally can't think of anything worse than having a lot of kids and I am one of 5 and my mum is one of 6.

One to two wasn’t an issue.
Two to three nearby killed me.

We found our second the easiest little boy. But our first is ASD and very much hard work so when our second came along we couldn’t believe how easy parenting can be!

I've got 2 with a 3.5 year age gap. First year of youngest's life was VERY tough, very, very, very hard and tbh traumatising at times. But I had PND and a baby who would not sleep and zero family support. I'm sure you'll have a much easier time of it than me.

They're 2.5 and 6 now and it's absolutely wonderful and they adore each other so I'm happy we decided to have 2.

Would never have a third though and dh has had the snip.

I found going from 1 to 2 incredibly hard. The first 2 years nearly broke me if I'm being completely honest. If you find 1 child tricky despite all the help you're getting from GP's then I'd think very carefully before adding another child into the mix.

I had a 3.5 yr age gap and I found the step up easy BUT I was already a sahm so different from your situation and we never had any childcare etc so it didn't change much. Also, crucially, dc2 was a model baby, slept through etc etc etc.

She was an absolutely horror of a toddler though for about 2 years but not once did I regret having her.

My second DC was very much easier than my first. Partly personality, partly I'd had more practice.

I have never regretted having another.

Yes, this! My first was such hard work as a baby, no sleep, reflux, clingy, allergies ... But her 8th year was absolute perfection so swings and roundabouts!

And yeah, second was easier after a tricky first.

First few years are hard work, of course, but then it's really lovely (other than the odd squabble). Our youngest is disabled but we'd have had a third if it had been possible.

I have 2 and it wasn't that bad to be fair. Especially when they get older.

I'm an only child and wish I could have a sibling to share things with and help out with elderly parents

This has also been the case for me. Having a second has been so different to one. Being with either child one on one is easier. First DC is generally much much easier than the younger sibling who is a tornado. It can go either way. Also have 3.5y age gap OP and I feel that aspect has worked well.

I found the first one harder than I expected as he was not an easy baby (which I didn’t really fully get at the time), plus I was quite anxious

second baby has been a more normal wash going baby. Im also a more chilled mum. Love motherhood, it’s been the best thing I’ve ever done

It's impossible to know! I went to have one more and had twins! The age gap was only two years and it was miserable!
Now they're a bit older it's still hard work but am so glad they have each other.
I don't think you can know for certain how well siblings get on it's always a gamble though.

Just to add to @80smonster teenagers of the same sex can share a room. Not the end of the world. It's normal to keep sharing. You'll find it in loads of households

I found going from 0 to 1 harder than 1 to 2. However, now they're a bit older there's a lot of big emotions which is full on but there's definitely still more positives than negatives!

Your oldest would be starting school by the time you have a second which might give you more of a break?

Totally depends on the child, I found 1-2 a waaaay easier adjustment than 0-1. You already know what to expect, plus my DC1 was a refluxy crying wouldn’t be put down type baby until 18months when he turned into the sweetest toddler ever, we got to 3 with him and it was a now or never situation for a sibling, I was so so scared about having another newborn… however DC2 was a unicorn baby, slept, smiled,giggled ,would be put down anywhere. She is however an absolute demon toddler…it’s harder now that she’s 2 than it has been so far, however I wouldn’t change it for the world

I have 2 with a similar age gap and it was way harder than I expected. Everyone said it would be easier because I knew what to expect etc and I naively believed that. Second child still doesn’t sleep and I feel guilty I can’t spend as much time with DC1 whilst also guilty DC2 doesn’t have the time/ attention DC1 had.

Im so glad I have them both though and they have each other, once DC2 is abit older I’m sure they will be great friends, it’s obvious they love each other. I wouldn’t change anything but I would be better prepared.

It also shocked me how expensive things are with 2. When I had 1 I didn’t think anything of paying for days out all the time, Christmas events etc. When you have 2 it really adds up.

Are you working or a sahm?

Obviously one is easier in lots of ways.
But the joy of two (or more i suppose), is unmeasurable.
Children benefit so much from siblings, so where it's possible, as in fertility wise, relationship wise, health wise etc, it's the best thing to do.

In some ways two is easier, as although they'll likely squabble, they play with each other. Which means you can get on with things rather than constantly having to entertain.
Also I think if I had just the one I'd be constantly trying to set up play dates and worry about them being lonely. And days out with just one child may be trickier too. Whereas I can take my children to the park, national trust or whatever and let them play together.

Totally depends on the children.

It’s been incredibly difficult for us as DS came along second and has SEN so our existing family dynamics went completely out of the window. No way was he able to just fit into the family.

It’s absolutely relentless and DDs life has been hugely impacted. It’s really very difficult for her.

we adore DS but life became infinitely more difficult when he came along.

My fabulous mum died last year at 85... never forgave her parents for one then done ... condemned her to life as an ' only' before contraception was even reliable..

Had no one to share life's use and down with, no want to take on the burden of our parents with. No one simply to share with who understood where she came from.

My grandparents decided on one than done because my grandmother did not want to be bothered with other children and only had my mum because it was expected of her… there were no money issues, my mother was brought up by nanny.. my grandmother wanted to spend her time with her husband and to live the life of a childless couple

@Behionest I have the same gap as you are proposing in your post. It definitely is a shock, and some days I think how easy it was with just one.... BUT then I see how much they love each other and their beautiful bond. Sure they have their moments but mostly they are super cute together. The gap meant I was in Mat leave when DD started school, and meant I wasn't paying childcare for two at once.

I am so glad and lucky we had a second and we are in a good routine now and I have time for me. DD is 4.5 and DS is 1. He is such a different baby, better sleeping, more chilled in general, settles into Nursery really well.

I have 3, and honestly, if I had my time over again I’d stop at one.
i found the baby/toddler years easy enough - hence having 3, but now I have 3 teenagers who all have different needs, different friends and different places to be - all at the same time. Everyone says it gets easier but that hasn’t been my experience. It has got much harder for me and I feel torn into pieces most of the time.
I would have been a much better parent to one.