Page 15 | Dh has walked off and left me alone at 1am in the street. 2 miles from home

Boopadoop90 · 2024-11-16T00:59:21+00:00

Just that really. We were out with friends, going back to theirs. Dh refused to back to theirs but I don't know why. The others left in a cab. I couldn't leave dh alone in the pub. I I said I'm going home. He said OK. Followed me out in a fit and angry, cos he felt obliged to follow me. He's walked home. I'm 2 miles away from homre and sitting in the cold shivering He messaged me to ask if I got an uber home. I said no, he said good we've spent £x on uber tonight. He's walked home and I'm sitting on the kerb, 2 miles away in the dark, cold.

MyrtlethePurpleTurtle · 16/11/2024 05:29

mamechange · 16/11/2024 03:48

Glad you are home safe.
P.S. It's kerb or curb . Sorry but it was driving me irrationally angry . Sleep well.

People were punning!

notbeenagreatday · 16/11/2024 05:25

You sound like a right martyr you could have been home a lot sooner if you'd started walking instead of sitting on a kerb or called an Uber

olivechuu · 16/11/2024 05:22

MyrtlethePurpleTurtle · 16/11/2024 05:22

Muhammed's post above or the OP's?

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muhammed just wanted op to have something to do whilst she was lying om the pavement

hollymeetsivy · 16/11/2024 05:22

Glad you're home safe. Please don't do this again.

Soontobe60 · 16/11/2024 05:22

SprinklesSparkles · 16/11/2024 01:13

are you drunk?

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Bit of a daft question - of course she’s drunk! Why else would she be sitting on the floor in the middle of a cold night?

MyrtlethePurpleTurtle · 16/11/2024 05:22

PyongyangKipperbang · 16/11/2024 02:06

Reported

Muhammed's post above or the OP's?

MyrtlethePurpleTurtle · 16/11/2024 05:19

whathaveiforgotten · 16/11/2024 01:59

Mate, you've got kids.

It's dangerous to sleep outside, in November, for a multitude of reasons. Let alone after drinking.

You're choosing to put their mother at risk, not your husband.

You are typing coherently on Mumsnet. So you are perfectly able to sort some sort of way home.

You're putting yourself at risk to prove a point. When you've got kids, that's such a selfish and irresponsible thing to do.

its an irresponsible thing to do whether or not you've got kids!

Cappuccinowithonesugarplease · 16/11/2024 05:19

Why couldn't you just leave him in the pub? Are you insecure? Do you not trust him? You are acting like a damsel in distress tbh! Hope you went home.

MyrtlethePurpleTurtle · 16/11/2024 05:16

Boopadoop90 · 16/11/2024 01:08

We were supposed to get in a cab to friends house. He refused but don't know why. Friends left
He told me to go with them
But I wasn't going to leave him alone in pub at 11.45pm. Friends left. I then said I was going home. He got the arse and felt like he HAD to follow me
I said don't bother if you feel like that
I've Been sitting on the cold kurb for an hour
He has walked home and messaged to day he's home if I need him. (He's drunk and can't drive to get me )

Edited

But I wasn't going to leave him alone in pub at 11.45pm

why not?

Londonrach1 · 16/11/2024 05:13

I don't understand. Why didn't you go home, either walk with him or get a taxi. Why seat on the kerb. Hope your home now

WiddlinDiddlin · 16/11/2024 05:04

Honestly they sound as bad as each other on the whole but I think she's just tipped the scales tonight.

He didn't want to do what she wanted to do. Who knows why, maybe he never wanted to go to her mates house, maybe they're annoying dicks. Maybe he is.

She then decided she couldn't possibly leave him in the pub alone (why, who the fuck knows) so she stayed.

Then she played the 'well I'll walk home by myself then if you won't leave' card to force him to come when he obviously wanted to stay in the pub..

Then not satisfied with his response to that, ie, he followed her out of the pub out of duty, not genuine care, she then refused to walk home with him, testing him to see if he'd come back and mollify her...

And he didn't.

So instead of growing the fuck up and going home, she sits on the pavement in the dark and cold by herself doing the 'woe is me' act, moaning about it on MN as there is no one else to moan to.

Hadjab · 16/11/2024 04:59

batmansknickers · 16/11/2024 03:10

You know, I actually thought for moment that this was a troll, and it might well still be one; thing is that there are people around that are ACTUALLY this utterly mad.

"I'll stay out all night in the cold that'll learn im!"

Yeah, I don’t understand a damn thing that’s happening here. I’m sure as fuck not going to sit on a kerb when Uber exists

Shoppedatwoolworths · 16/11/2024 04:57

think I would have just booked a hotel and turned off my phone 😬

SnoopysHoose · 16/11/2024 04:56

Lying on the pavement for an hour rather than just get a taxi home?
What happens in the morning? a big fight over 'you left me alone in the dark' this is madness.

mathanxiety · 16/11/2024 04:56

Boopadoop90 · 16/11/2024 01:19

I just wanted him to show he Cared about me. He is probably in bed now

So now you know he doesn't give a shit about you. Think of this revelation as a gift, not a disappointment. Clarity is always preferable to confusion.

However, you now need to go somewhere to warm up and sleep.

Call an Uber and go home or go to your friends' house.

But do not try sleeping outside in the cold.

mathanxiety · 16/11/2024 04:51

DurinsBane · 16/11/2024 01:05

If he felt obliged to follow you, and he did follow you out of the pub, how come you didn’t walk home together? How did you get separated?

He left her in a huff to punish her for wanting to do something he didn't want to do.

He knows it's not safe. He doesn't care.

JudgeJ · 16/11/2024 04:37

Newnamehiwhodis · 16/11/2024 03:56

NO MAN - in fact no person at all- is worth putting yourself in danger for.
hope you are ok.
fuck that cad.

She chose to put herself in danger, she could have walked behind him if he wanted to walk home alone. She told him to go, he went! Seems that he can't do right for doing wrong!

JudgeJ · 16/11/2024 04:30

PinkyFlamingo · 16/11/2024 02:43

Eh? Why aren't you just walking home?!

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She'd called his bluff and lost.

UsernameNameUser · 16/11/2024 04:20

Newnamehiwhodis · 16/11/2024 03:55

Oh hun I understand this so much. I would have done exactly this with my ex, because I felt so unprotected by him. It awakens your inner little girl, doesn’t it, and you just want him to show up for you.
be your own strong protector. Never again put yourself in a vulnerable position so he’ll protect you or take care of you, because he won’t.
this is a small sign of a big problem. There’s something you’re not feeling secure about in your relationship, and this is just a symptom of it.
I’m so sorry. I know how much that hurts and how a person can just get stuck.

please take good care of yourself FIRST, moving forward.
the more you take care of yourself, the more you show that neglected inner part of you that you are worth it, that you are worthy of your own love and care. And the more you heal, the less you’ll be able to tolerate his bullshit.

Yeah, no, this just means you need therapy for daddy issues

ThinWomansBrain · 16/11/2024 04:19

DogsandFlowers · 16/11/2024 01:05

Cos.... predatory men??!

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because someone walking at pace and with purpose is so much more of a target than .someone sitting on a kerb, presumably pissed.

UsernameNameUser · 16/11/2024 04:17

What’s more shocking to me than throwing a tantrum and sitting on the ground all night is that people like this have children!!!

Artistbythewater · 16/11/2024 04:14

You are both drunk. Completely irresponsible with a child that relies on you. I hope you got home safely. Dh should never have left you op. Was the babysitter leaving? And he had to get back for your son?

Bournetilly · 16/11/2024 04:14

You are being absolutely ridiculous. Instead of walking 2 miles home you’ve sat on a kerb for an hour and now you are going to sleep on the kerb. You can’t be that concerned for your safety.

FancyNewt · 16/11/2024 04:13

Newnamehiwhodis · 16/11/2024 03:55

Oh hun I understand this so much. I would have done exactly this with my ex, because I felt so unprotected by him. It awakens your inner little girl, doesn’t it, and you just want him to show up for you.
be your own strong protector. Never again put yourself in a vulnerable position so he’ll protect you or take care of you, because he won’t.
this is a small sign of a big problem. There’s something you’re not feeling secure about in your relationship, and this is just a symptom of it.
I’m so sorry. I know how much that hurts and how a person can just get stuck.

please take good care of yourself FIRST, moving forward.
the more you take care of yourself, the more you show that neglected inner part of you that you are worth it, that you are worthy of your own love and care. And the more you heal, the less you’ll be able to tolerate his bullshit.

" Inner little girl?". Bleugh.

I don't even know where to start with this claptrap.

olivechuu · 16/11/2024 04:09

Newnamehiwhodis · 16/11/2024 03:55

Oh hun I understand this so much. I would have done exactly this with my ex, because I felt so unprotected by him. It awakens your inner little girl, doesn’t it, and you just want him to show up for you.
be your own strong protector. Never again put yourself in a vulnerable position so he’ll protect you or take care of you, because he won’t.
this is a small sign of a big problem. There’s something you’re not feeling secure about in your relationship, and this is just a symptom of it.
I’m so sorry. I know how much that hurts and how a person can just get stuck.

please take good care of yourself FIRST, moving forward.
the more you take care of yourself, the more you show that neglected inner part of you that you are worth it, that you are worthy of your own love and care. And the more you heal, the less you’ll be able to tolerate his bullshit.

This is absolutely fuckin unhinged, by the way. A fully crackpot diatribe from one pavement lounger to another. If you’re already in therapy its not working and if you’re not you should be.