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AIBU?

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Original poster

If you want a loan repaying then you can’t decide you’ll only accept cash ?

135 replies

Shouldbeeasy · 15/11/2024 12:15

I was loaned £1000 by a family member. The agreement was to pay it back £250 a month for 4 months. It was transferred to me.

I made the first repayment text to say I’d done it then get a message back that they’ve sent it back and I’m to deliver cash each month to them . They live THREE hours away. This was not agreed and I don’t understand but each time I say no I’m only doing bank transfer they won’t accept it. So now I don’t know what to do and I cant do a 6 hour round trip every month for 4 months !!!

OP posts:
Original poster
Shouldbeeasy · 15/11/2024 12:49

Changed18 · 15/11/2024 12:39

Is it your parents - and is it a way of getting you to visit them?

No it’s dsis

OP posts:
BobbyBiscuits · 15/11/2024 12:48

Could they be trying to conceal the money from a controlling partner? Are they in plenty of debt and if it goes into their account it will come out automatically as part of a payment scheme? Her bank account could be being investigated? I can't really see why else she'd refuse a transfer.

Either way it's a right pain in the arse. Tell her you'll post it to her, signed for special delivery. But deduct the cost of the postage from the amount you give.

user1492757084 · 15/11/2024 12:47

Maybe it's so the tax office doen't think it is revenue.

I'd put the money aside and deliver it in one or two trips, or meet conveniently in the middle.

Notwhatuwanttohear · 15/11/2024 12:44

Keep the money to one side and give it to them when you next see them.

I would NOT be going up there especially as they are totally unreasonable.

Hopefully you won't need to borrow money from them in future.

RB68 · 15/11/2024 12:42

few options

tell them you can do that but need to deduct travel expenses given that its 6 hrs of driving

find someone local to them that can deliver in your stead

can do a cash delivery BUT with a deduction for cost of delivery by secure post etc

send them a picture of the cash and say its sat waiting and when gets to 1k will deliver

Frankly its an unreasonable term and added after so even if they went to small claims which is prob their only option they would be told as much and told to accept direct payment

I suspect this may be due to them getting benefits of some kind and this payment being classed as income by DWP etc

Hallllllllie · 15/11/2024 12:42

I wouldnt even drive up in 4 months. Batshit behaviour. They accept it in the bank or wait until they collect or or until I'm up that way again.

Goody2ShoesAndTheFilthyBeast · 15/11/2024 12:42

Tell them they are bring ridiculous and if they insist on you bringing it up you will only do it if they give you their written agreement that the cost of you doing that will come out of the repayment so you'll come up and hand over the money minus all your travel expenses.

OneTC · 15/11/2024 12:40

I would accept the lenders need for cash but I'd not accept the monthly 6 hour round trips and I'd deliver in 4 months

If there's other family more local to them can you transfer to them and they deliver in cash?

Changed18 · 15/11/2024 12:39

Is it your parents - and is it a way of getting you to visit them?

CaptainBeanThief · 15/11/2024 12:37

Weird as fuck.
They are obviously paranoid someone is watching their bank because they are involved in some dodgy dealings 😑

Barrenfieldoffucks · 15/11/2024 12:32

I would assume it is in the hope of your visiting every month.

mummytrex · 15/11/2024 12:32

Given how difficult they're being I'd insist on bank transfer. What happens if they deny having been given the cash further down the line?

Original poster
Shouldbeeasy · 15/11/2024 12:30

They won’t explain why and for years we’ve done transfers for things like the dc birthday and Xmas gifts so I just assumed it would be the same but it seems to be a major problem . I’ve messaged to say In 4 months ill be up with the full amount so waiting for a response

OP posts:
Devilsmommy · 15/11/2024 12:28

CarrotPencil · 15/11/2024 12:16

Say ‘I can’t travel up to you every month, so you’ll have to either accept the bank transfers or write off the money’.

First post nails it

purplecorkheart · 15/11/2024 12:27

Could you send it via Western Union or something similar? If they are self employed they maybe concern that they will get taxed on that?

Singleandproud · 15/11/2024 12:26

Are they likely to have applied for or receive UC? If so then they don't want it to look like they have additional income.
If they insist on cash just do the trip once at the end of the four months and never borrow from them again.

Corey28 · 15/11/2024 12:26

Nope. If you pay in cash you'll have no proof that you paid them back.

Wakeywake · 15/11/2024 12:25

Ask for a receipt if you give it in cash - they seem weird enough to deny you've paid it back.

SoNiceToComeHomeTo · 15/11/2024 12:25

Ask them to explain why they want cash. We can only guess at their reasons.
It sounds dodgy, but may not be. They may believe that they will get taxed on the repayments, something like that. If so you'll be able to explain that they won't be taxed and offer them a signed statement that this is a repayment for a loan.
If they won't say why they want cash, I would just say sorry you can't drive that far each month, and continue to transfer the payment as agreed originally. But if they insist on collecting it instead, make sure you get a receipt each time so that there is no possible question of whether you've paid it back in full.

MissUltraViolet · 15/11/2024 12:24

They either allow the transfer at £250 per month as agreed or they can wait 4 months and you will bring the lot to them in cash...and i'd still be pissed at having to do that.

What's their problem? why are they being so awkward? it's not even like they gave it to you in cash to begin with ffs.

coffeesaveslives · 15/11/2024 12:24

"I can't do that - so you can either accept the bank transfer or we'll write it off completely".

Icanttakethisanymore · 15/11/2024 12:23

Is it a tax dodge? Are they self employed or a business owner? They’ve classed your ‘loan’ as an expense to decrease their tax bill?

JackJarvisEsq · 15/11/2024 12:22

When you do make the visit deliver it in 1s and 2s

TiramisuThief · 15/11/2024 12:21

"I can't afford the time or expense of travelling every month. I can either do a bank transfer of the monthly amount, you can collect or I can bring you the full amount in 4 months time"

CarrotPencil · 15/11/2024 12:21

Oh yeah lots of good alternatives. Whatever you do OP, DO NOT give this person the satisfaction of making you run up and down to them every month! Don’t do it!!! If it has to be cash (it doesn’t) the special delivery was a good idea. My fave idea though is make them travel to you every month 🙂🙂🙂

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