How old is too old to have a baby?

4th thread you have done on this, perplexing, wonder what answer your waiting on...

Anything above 35 is too old.

Too old is when you're in menopause. (Excluding those who go through it prematurely).

It's clear you think it's brilliant to be an elderly mother and get all defensive at everyone pointing out the major downsides, so.... why ask for opinions?

I would have said 35 but reading this post makes me realize I am weeks from turning 35 and I don't think now I am too old for another one...

I had children at 43/45 - natural conception, trouble free births. Now in early 60s - so the dreaded ‘teenagers in 60s’ territory. It’s actually all going fine. Still working full time - not floored by menopause during toddler years. No zimmer frame yet or lack of energy. I seemed to cope with pregnancy better than many younger colleagues - no time off - and this was before the days of WFH, travelling regularly etc. Everyone is different. I agree that it’s unlikely I’ll be much practical use as a grandmother and will likely die earlier than most of their contemporaries’ mothers but I’ve been a solid, dependable, engaged and loving parent who was able to provide a comfortable home and allow them to reach their potential (so far). Very few people grow up in 100% ideal circumstances. Having a partner who shoulders their share is also a massive bonus.

Why did I have a child at 38? Because sadly life didn't work out as I wanted and I didn't meet the right person until later.
Of course, life is unpredictable and a young mum could die early and an old mum could live to a 100. I know that's true. I myself had cancer when my children were toddlers. My friend died young of cancer, leaving two children behind. My mum had my brother at 42.
However we do know that it's rare to die young and in general, the later you have your children, the less time you'll have with them.
I don't think being an older mum is a disaster, at all. We all know older mums who are doing a great job (I include myself!! Haha!). I just think that in an ideal world there are many benefits to having them younger. Like I said in my first post, many women have a really tough time through perimenopause/menopause - low energy, insomnia, anxiety etc. I wish I'd had mine earlier so I had more energy when they were younger.

I just had my first at 37 didn't meet my DP till I was 31 and when we started TTC it took us 2 years . If I have another one I would probably be 40 giving birth not sure I want another one as I feel that's too old but I don't want her to be an only child (I'm an only child)

I think anything under 40 is fine (I had my last at 33 but plenty of my friends had them up to 40) but my friend had a baby at 42 and she says that her DC has aged her by about 25 years overnight and she is physically and mentally exhausted.

Yes not sure what you're asking, I had my last one at 49, surprise pregnancy despite using contraception, obviously that was as nature intended, has given me a new lease of life in some ways. But had 3 other children to help. Ideal is younger for energy but some people don't meet the right partner until later on (I married at 29 so not that young). And not usually ideal for finance/career path.

Not quite as simplistic as that - this study showed that maternal life expectancy increased by 5% for every year of maternal age and indicated that women who have children later live longer.

pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC4270889/#:~:text=For%20each%20additional%20year%20in,last%20child%20before%20age%2029.

As an older mum, one thing I do feel very keenly is that I must take responsibility for my health and wellbeing so that I can stay healthy and well for as long as possible and minimize my risk of developing long term chronic or acute health conditions. So maintaining a healthy weight, exercising, not eating ultra processed food, taking time for self care and limiting stress.

If you can get pregnant naturally you are not too old to have a baby. Average life expectancy is in the 80s in this country and late motherhood is correlated with long life. Even women who have children at the end of their fertile years can expect to live beyond their children becoming independent adults. And older parents are more stable parents.

I had mine at 25 and 29
To be honest, I would have had them younger! And if financially able, maybe another.
I'm 32 with a three year old and definitely notice the difference with my fitness levels this time around. I always want to use the pram because picking up my toddler is a struggle sometimes now
I'm not overweight or anything I'm 5'2 and around 9st just more tired with school run in the mix etc.

My cut off would be 34.

Agree with this. Much more likely you and/or the child are damaged in some way, or suffer complications or ongoing conditions. Plus you’re dealing with teens in your 60’s, while probably still working and maybe supporting elderly relatives. Fuck that.

Mine was ivf but own eggs from a frozen cycle when I was 42

But my friend got preg naturally at 43

Yes obv rarer but happens as op can testament

From mid 40s. I had my first in my mid 30s and my second in late 30s.This enabled me to pursue my career and I was in a more senior and financially stable position when children came along.

For me, 35 was my limit. I found pregnancy very hard and the early years exhausting. I cant imagine going through that in my 40s, plus the risks get higher and higher.

I'm also really enjoying having teens in my 40s and being able to get my life back.

I'd one at 24 and one at 31

I'm fit and healthy but no thank you, no more

I wouldn't have another one past 35

I don't want any after 35. Am 32 and pregnant with first child which would be my only. If I didn't have children, I wouldn't have an age limit

I see what the poster is saying. If you have a baby at 45 you would be way more tired if you have done 10 years of parenting already, if it’s your first baby you would be more likely to be well rested I guess.

Yes there are exceptions but generally a younger mum will have longer with her dc.
I do think older years is overlooked. My dc’s friend has retired parents. They have massive arguments as they are not on her wavelength. They are also facing having to fund her at uni while retired (the SFE thresholds are so low that 2 pensions mean she isn’t eligible for full loan and her rent is just under £10,000 a year at a norther uni)