How old is too old to have a baby?

Lmao.

All your 3 children children are under 4. Except the one that's not. Obviously 🤣

That's the funniest attempt at trying to talk your way of being caught telling fibs I think I've seen on MN.

I understand having a personal cut off point for whatever reason but to be 'absolutely heartbroken at leaving it too late' when you're only 30 is crazy!

Why on earth do you feel like it's unlikely you'll be able to have kids now?

The average age for a women in the UK to have their first baby is creeping up to 30 now so there's basically as many 35 year olds having their first as there are 25 year olds

@EarthlingHere You are very young to be thinking like this! I doomscroll on these threads and make myself stressed! I met my partner at 33 and had two close together. I don't think I was too old. Don't let these threads scare you.

This makes no sense. On your other thread you've said you are pregnant with a daughter? Is she still being considered?

I’m 30, only just met someone (6 months) so unlikely we will be able to have children now. My heart is absolutely broken but think we’ve just left it too late. Partner is 31 now.

I have 4 children and my youngest ti's 12. I was 39 when I had him and no regrets. He was last my 4th c section . He was also the child that flagged how neurodivergent my other children were!! 😂No regrets love it and would not change a thing!

I had mine at 27 and 32. I had in my head that I wanted to be done by 30 but life had other plans. For myself I want to be able to be a hands on mum and nanna if my kids have kids of their own. I think I'd say too old is having a high probability of dying before my kids reached age 30

But you asked, how old is too old...
Some have replied that they feel you are too old.
Why ask at all?

I was a first time mum at 45 and delighted. I might have been more tired than younger mums but I was a lot more together emotionally than I would have been as a 20 something mother.

I had my 3rd at 36. But I was lucky that I’d met DH early and had DC1 at 30.

I knew I wanted to be a mother so if circumstances had been different & I hadn’t met someone I would have probably tried for children up to the age of 45. I’m 50 now and the thought of having child under 5 is a bit scary!

It totally varies on you and your situation at the time.

My husband and I agreed that we would not have any children past our 20s and had two children in our 20s.

That has worked out really well for us and that's what we wanted. However, it's not for everyone.

My mother is old and need support and care. I have my own small children. Many people have involved grandparents and I have extra responsibilities. Mother was 38 having me. I've already lost my father. I don't think dying young itself is the problem it's burdening a young person in their 20s with your care. It's not being able to physically play with your kids. I have been jealous all my life of those who's parent are involved in their life. Now that could be due to age but an older parent could make extra effort to be there but mine just didn't. If you are aware and trying to mitigate it then it's fine. If you expect your child to pander to your old age while having a young family of your own then done do it. It's cruel. Because we can't say no we are too busy to help- that's abandoning our parenting who gave us life. I'm a shell of a person so many people rely on my care. My dad died last year and all I felt was relief I now would have more time for my kids. That's so very wrong. But that's the reality of having to care for elderly parents. Just be aware of that

Some women start at 40 as they only settle down at 40. I'm 43 and I wouldn't have one now unless my contraception didn't work.

I’m not really sure. A couple of my friends had their first children at 40/41 they have fair more energy than me. I think maybe I could have done 38 so starting school now. My SIL had hers at 18 and 20, she died at 36 so I don’t think who can make your decision based on how long you’ll have with your children. More how fit and healthy you are at this time.

Had mine at 33 would love to have another now at 43 but sadly went through early menopause. Wasn't up to it in my son's early years due to problems with blood clots etc.

I wanted to be done by 35, and I was lucky that was possible as I met someone and we didn’t have any fertility issues. I don’t judge others for being older parents, though. People have all sorts of different circumstances.

One of my bosses has just become a Dad again in his 60s (second marriage, younger wife) and I do privately think ‘good luck to you, Sir!’. But he seems thrilled, so fair enough.

This is such a strange thread, I’ve answered YABU, because you’re going to get (and have got!) so many different answers. Not sure what you were expecting.

Everyone has a different opinion, and no one can really give you a definitive answer.

Some say ‘oh I’m so glad I had mine young, now in my 40s I can do whatever I want’ whilst others (myself included) felt they weren’t ready for kids in their 20s. Or 30s even. Personally, I wouldn’t want to be a grandma in my mid 40s, and I don’t feel old and past it at all.
But each to their own!!

I just really divides people, and I think it’s completely unnecessary tbh.

I didn’t meet my husband until I was 40, we had our daughter when I was 41, been trying for a second since she was 9mths old (she is now 3.5) and it’s not happened. I’m desperate for her to have a sibling as being older parents, want her to have someone into adulthood. We will give it until next year when I turn 46 before giving up and getting a puppy!

I had my children in my early 20s and would be gutted if my children had children before 30. I’ve spent loads on their education and want them to go to uni and build a career and travel the world whilst carefree (and not end up reliant on a husband like I was). I would say start at 32 with 40 as the finish nowadays.

In my friends group almost 100% of us had our first child between 30 & 40. One had a baby at 18 and another at 23/24. After uni we all started on career paths, travelling, working overseas, and didn’t get married until late 20s. As much judgement as there is on this thread for having a baby over 35 you can turn it around and ask how young is too young. I find it odd when I meet someone in late 30s or early 40s who is already a grandparent.

Most people can look after a baby. A 50 year old could look after a baby. But I don't want to be parenting a teenager in my 60s! I also don't want my teenager being worried about my health and longevity because I'm in my 60s. One of my best friends was in tears at uni because her dad was a lot older than her mum (in his 70s at the time) and was diagnosed with alzheimers, she was 20. While things can happen any age, I just wanted to have my kids as old as possible before having to worry about my health or care.

As long as you're body is able to do so healthily, it's not too old.