To feel bad for the new employee at work

I have just had to do a harrassment training and this is harrassment. So you decide if you can/must report this to HR or if she does it.

@MariMiceMouse they sound like a bunch of jealous bullies, she sounds too honest for her own good, I wouldn’t have told them the flat is a gift.

Atleast she has a few decent people there like yourself Xx

Is this obsession with people's houses (or other possessions) and what they paid for them a big thing in London and the SE?

The people I know who talk regularly about house prices are all based down south. I've spent my entire working life in the north and I dont think I've ever heard a colleague talking about what someone else's house cost.

I only really hear house prices being discussed if someone is actually in the process of moving house, and then only generically (e.g. "Oh, [X] area is quite expensive so we wouldn't be able to afford a 4 bed there, [Y] area is a bit cheaper, but doesn't have the train line...")

Yes, I get that. People are asked questions and then castigated for merely being honest.

Good for her! She has done nothing wrong. At least she is going to work and trying to forge a career, plenty of people don't do that even without a privileged background.ox

She will learn to keep private things to herself but it's a shame, we should be able to share without others misrepresenting it. That sort of jealousy is toxic.

Yes, she definitely needs to learn how to keep her private life away from gossips, particularly in a workplace like this. (I thank my stars that my colleagues don't do this sort of thing and all I have to put up with is tedious football banter!)

As she gets older she will learn not to get drawn into interrogations like that. She could have shut it down at the first question by refusing to engage, and she will learn to do so in future.

Had an acquaintance once who was a "trust fund baby"
Met her through someone initially where she was just one of the mums.

It wasn't until much later, I realised the scale of the trust fund. I'm talking years of knowing her.

She is a down to earth person, never talks money, never brags or otherwise.

If your colleague is genuinely a lovely person, most people will overlook the misjudged oversharing and treat her accordingly.

I have a colleague like this and everyone loves him, people don't ever mention his financial situation negatively. People shouldn't be judging her based on how fortunate she is. If she's a good person what they are doing is bullying and shouldn't be tolerated. It's school playground behaviour.

Agree 100%

Frankly they sound like kids in the playground and it may be well to challenge this kind of behaviour before it gets any worse

She could perhaps try to not mention her privilege so much. I mean, "daddy bought me a flat in Mayfair" is, at the very least, going to garner some smirks. To be honest, although the situation is of course unpleasant, at the end of the day this young woman obviously doesn't have to work. I would feel far more sorry for the impoverished and bullied office cleaner for example.

Aren't you a delight

Rightly or wrongly, offices have always had politics and gossip. Hopefully it’ll be a steep learning curve for her re humility and not oversharing with colleagues. If she’s great at her job, in time she will likely be judged on that. If not….

I think this is fair. There is a LOT of fawning over wealth on MN, with people going to great pains to be happy for rich people (so as not to appear jealous) and framing the very privileged as 'suffering the same as everyone else'. In the real world the majority of people think this is a nonsense and if they had the choice of being the cosseted daughter of a multi millionaire and never having anyone be spiteful about their privilege...well, it's no choice at all really, is it?
In an ideal fluffy world, all the less well off people would be absolutely delighted at the good fortune of their young colleague, wearing their months salary to work and being gifted a home. They'd oo and coo and happily go home to their debts and house share, so happy for her, because she's 'nice'. In the world we live in this will not happen and she will need coping strategies.

‘ It sounds awful but I'd question why she even needs to work?’

For Something to do. Charities, arts, publishing is stuffed full of Amelia’s and Toby’s who don’t really need the money. It’s part of what keeps the wages very low for entry level positions in these industries which obvs isn’t an issue for some but a big problem for the WC graduates who actually need to live off the money they’re paid.

This is a bizarre thing to have a stick up your arse about!

It was very clear what the OP meant.

They’re not cruel, they’re plain jealous. Very ugly.

I would be telling them they are coming across as jealous and it’s not a good look.

I would speak to these people either publicly if appropriate or privately. It's not fair on her and she likely won't feel confident enough to stick up for herself.

It doesn't need to be a huge thing but pointing out you've noticed the digs and intrusive questions might be enough.

This was my guess before I saw this post. She is privileged, but also has the audacity to be young and female to go with it.

Your workplace culture sounds horrific - I would challenge it when people say negative things. I wouldn't spend too much energy feeling sorry for her though, because with that level of privilege, the odds will be stacked in her favour throughout her life. This is one extremely minor blip.

This mindset I keep seeing online that it’s acceptable to be nasty to anyone who’s got more than you is very strange.

The others started asking questions, including a dig about not being able to afford it on her salary, and she just told the truth - was she meant to lie? I find people that lie about their privilege and pretend they’ve done everything themself far more unbearable than those who are honest about it.

They're Old Etonians.

What is it that makes you think people want her to fail? Are they saying nasty things? Are they not working well in the team? Have they made criticism of her?

I'm sure she will, but that doesn't make it ok to treat people that way.

Actually she may not if she has grown up only with people like her.
DD is at a Uni where there are a LOT of Private school kids from Surrey and similar, she says most of them are lovely but have no clue at all that their experiences aren't universal.
They don't ask her IF she is going skiing for Christmas, they ask WHERE she is going skiing for Christmas.

In fairness, this young woman will have to deal with encountering people who resent her privilege throughout her life, if she is in workplaces that involve taking a step outside her usual social circles, so she will gave to evolve a way of handling it.

would you like some ketchup for that chip?

Nasty