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Scratched/Dented the car, to tell DH it wasn’t me???

90 replies

AbbieNe · 14/11/2024 00:53

So I’ve (badly) scratched and dented our car, DH will be super pissed. Can I get away with saying another vehicle must have done this by crashing into it whilst parked??? Help!!

OP posts:
marshmallowfinder · 14/11/2024 17:15

Lastonightadjsavedmylife · 14/11/2024 16:54

I’m sorry but it really doesn’t, our language has moved on. Sure in the 80s it meant that, but thr world is much smaller now and used in context most people now know what pissed means. It is common parliance.

Yes, it's commonly said but isn't correct here. It's American. Should we start calling trousers 'pants', too?

Lastonightadjsavedmylife · 14/11/2024 16:54

marshmallowfinder · 14/11/2024 16:53

I disagree. Pissed means drunk in the UK. Pissed OFF means annoyed.

I’m sorry but it really doesn’t, our language has moved on. Sure in the 80s it meant that, but thr world is much smaller now and used in context most people now know what pissed means. It is common parliance.

marshmallowfinder · 14/11/2024 16:53

FupaTrooper · 14/11/2024 08:39

Everyone I know in the UK says it (of many different ages). I also lived in various European countries, Asian countries and Australia (so met people from everywhere).

It is a word used by pretty much the entire English speaking world in this context nowadays

Edited

I disagree. Pissed means drunk in the UK. Pissed OFF means annoyed.

Owly11 · 14/11/2024 16:30

Who legally owns the car and whose name is the insurance in? If it's in his name and he makes an insurance claim you won't be able to lie on the insurance forms so it's a very silly idea to lie about it to him as you won't be able to keep the entire thing secret from start to finish, and your lying will compound whatever the dynamic is between you that you feel you have to lie.

I also doubt you will get away with the lie because either the damage will make it obvious what happened or because your husband knows you very well and you are scared of him so he can probably tell when you are lying.

The real question is, why are you worried about him being angry? If it's just that you are conflict averse, fine. If it's more sinister than that then you have a DH problem not a car problem. I personally would hate to be in a relationship with someone that I was scared of being honest with about accidents and mistakes.

OnGoldenPond · 14/11/2024 16:30

Accidents happen. If you are scared of telling your DH about an accident because of his bad reaction then you are being abused. Please protect yourself. Flowers

Hoppinggreen · 14/11/2024 16:27

ClytemnestraWasMisunderstood · 14/11/2024 07:22

No, it is not. It is an American import and sounds ridiculous over here as pissed is a well known descriptor for drunk
Not being 'faux' pedantic, I am being 'real' pedantic

True, I know that in some (incorrect) contexts it can mean cross but here in The UK it usually means drunk, we speak English not American

GoodyBag · 14/11/2024 16:19

ClytemnestraWasMisunderstood · 14/11/2024 13:18

Thank you, Miss

Well, if you behave like a child…

lunar1 · 14/11/2024 13:24

Lie about the scratch and make plans to leave your husband. This is no way to live your life.

ClytemnestraWasMisunderstood · 14/11/2024 13:18

GoodyBag · 14/11/2024 11:36

A woman clearly in fear of her husband posts looking for advice, and you’d prefer to spend your time making sarcastic and pedantic comments despite clearly knowing fully well what she meant?

Very poor behaviour from you. I hope you’re nicer in real life.

Thank you, Miss

DappledThings · 14/11/2024 13:03

Anonymityisvital · 14/11/2024 12:33

I agree with this
I also think it's poor the number of pp who are saying things along the lines of " it's only a car" and because of their own relationship experience are making light of it.
We don't know OP's DH or her relationship with him but you only have to read MN threads for a short time to know a lot of women are in abusive relationships and live in real fear of their partners

I don't think they are making light of it. I think the point they are making (at least I was) is that OP's husband's reaction is disproportionate and that's not OK. Saying it's just a ding and their partners wouldn't react like that isn't making light of it, it's highlighting to OP that her fear means her situation isn't OK and isn't a normal one she should just accept. It's supportive rather than dismissive.

Anonymityisvital · 14/11/2024 12:33

GoodyBag · 14/11/2024 11:36

A woman clearly in fear of her husband posts looking for advice, and you’d prefer to spend your time making sarcastic and pedantic comments despite clearly knowing fully well what she meant?

Very poor behaviour from you. I hope you’re nicer in real life.

I agree with this
I also think it's poor the number of pp who are saying things along the lines of " it's only a car" and because of their own relationship experience are making light of it.
We don't know OP's DH or her relationship with him but you only have to read MN threads for a short time to know a lot of women are in abusive relationships and live in real fear of their partners

MagicSteaks · 14/11/2024 11:36

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

GoodyBag · 14/11/2024 11:36

ClytemnestraWasMisunderstood · 14/11/2024 07:11

I was being sarcastic
I know what 'pissed' means in America, but it has a different meaning here.
Unless one is trying to sound American, what with being ...super excited for...' , and 'pissed' about stuff

A woman clearly in fear of her husband posts looking for advice, and you’d prefer to spend your time making sarcastic and pedantic comments despite clearly knowing fully well what she meant?

Very poor behaviour from you. I hope you’re nicer in real life.

HelpMeGetThrough · 14/11/2024 11:33

Jesus it's only a piece of metal, absolutely no reason to get pissed.

People are far more important than a car.

MaloryJones · 14/11/2024 11:21

Crucible · 14/11/2024 09:00

@ClytemnestraWasMisunderstood perhaps 'Piss off'?

UK standard phase.

😆

boulevardofbrokendreamss · 14/11/2024 11:21

I reversed into a massive tree, how I didn't see it I don't know. It was dark. I told h that it was a bollard. Saved some grief.

ClytemnestraWasMisunderstood · 14/11/2024 10:18

Crucible · 14/11/2024 09:00

@ClytemnestraWasMisunderstood perhaps 'Piss off'?

UK standard phase.

And you can fuck off
Old english

Allfur · 14/11/2024 09:59

Anyone who gets upset about scratches on cars is an idiot

Allfur · 14/11/2024 09:55

Lastonightadjsavedmylife · 14/11/2024 07:19

Pissed is in common language in the uk. I’m not sure this is the thread to be faux pendantic on.

I'm here for the faux pedantry

FiveShelties · 14/11/2024 09:32

You could be right. I may just be getting cynical with the sheer number of one post threads started recently, which are usually later withdrawn by MN.

Anonymityisvital · 14/11/2024 09:24

FiveShelties · 14/11/2024 08:28

Wow another thread started by someone who only posts once - how unusual, you could be forgiven for thinking it is a wind up 🙄🙄

Well OP may well have told her DH about the car and perhaps she was right to fear his reaction.
So criticising the fact she hasn't come back onto the thread when there may be a genuine reason is not right imo.

FupaTrooper · 14/11/2024 09:23

@Crucible 😂

Crucible · 14/11/2024 09:00

@ClytemnestraWasMisunderstood perhaps 'Piss off'?

UK standard phase.

DappledThings · 14/11/2024 08:57

FupaTrooper · 14/11/2024 08:39

Everyone I know in the UK says it (of many different ages). I also lived in various European countries, Asian countries and Australia (so met people from everywhere).

It is a word used by pretty much the entire English speaking world in this context nowadays

Edited

I only know one person to have said it in real life. American import where it's just a different word for the same thing are a bit annoying. But in the case of pissed where it actually has an entirely different meaning it is actively unhelpful. Pissed = drunk. Pissed off = angry.

WildGuide · 14/11/2024 08:48

ClytemnestraWasMisunderstood · 14/11/2024 07:22

No, it is not. It is an American import and sounds ridiculous over here as pissed is a well known descriptor for drunk
Not being 'faux' pedantic, I am being 'real' pedantic

Does it make you feel good about yourself to derail a thread where a woman is need of support due to an unreasonably angry husband with wide eyed disingenuousness about a word which, regardless of your personal feelings, is widely used and understood in the UK?

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