Has afternoon tea food for a child changed significantly?

Mine doesn't normally eat much after school, maybe a banana or an apple. If I offered hot food at 4pm he would eat just not as much as he would at 6pm.

He'd then not eat at dinner time and would then wake in the night hungry. I know this as this happens when he goes to parties/ playdates with food. I don't want to be making toast at 2am for a 4yr old.

Also can’t find the comment but to the person who said four year olds don’t need four meals… 1) OP isn’t suggesting a full meal, 2) My 4yo will sometimes eat two breakfasts, lunch, a second lunch when in from school, then tea. Very healthy and active, would rather five meals a day than a billion snacks

yeah it was me.

1. 3 fishfingers and baked beans is a whole meal. This is the issue
2. You do understand that 5 meals a day (bloody hell) isn’t better than 3 and some healthy snacks don’t you? The whole point of ‘snacks’ is that they’re, well, snacky. Healthy small bites to tide you over. As I say, 25% of kids are obese by 4/5 and it’s not hard to see how by this thread

I took those quantities directly from the OP's posts. Take a look for yourself, it is there.

Ok those pancakes..we don’t have ready made ones like those ones to buy. But otherwise toaster was a good idea for it!

This thread is full of orthorexic control freak parents who see a banana as a treat. Wait till your kids are at secondary school- they'll be spending money on sweets and crisps every single day and you won't have any choice

So reducing slightly means your offering would have a near identical amount of calories, 45ml is nowhere near half a can, unless you’re referring to the halfsize cans.

That's still not significantly fewer calories than 2 fishfingers and 3 scoops of beans. Cheese is very calorie dense. You can add it all up if you want.

No-I’m talking 2 bread sticks at most, a couple of cubes of cheese and a few grapes or half an apple. OP said 2 fish fingers and 3-4 tablespoons of beans-that’s nearly half a can!

I’m talking probably 1-2 bread sticks, a couple of cubes of cheese and a couple of grapes. My DC would have eaten on the walk home TBF. OP is talking 2 fish fingers and 3-4 tablespoons of beans-that’s nearly half a tin and is very filling.

I think it’s the perception of cooking that will also have a negative effect.

Not that it matters, as the OP is going to do it anyway 🤷‍♀️

I live in Asia OP, so I think I understand more where you are coming from. I personally think fish fingers are a great snack. I would serve at 2pm though as then it's a bit longer until dinner.

I would serve two fish fingers and some cucumber and carrot sticks. Ditch the beans and then you have a happy medium.

People in all countries have quite rigid ideas about food and even though something may be the same calorie wise, they won't hear of it being served unless at their deemed correct time.

I think the problem is that while logically FF amd beans may well be the same calories as some of the ogjer suggestions, they are firmly 'dinner/ meal foods' in most peoples minds. So if the kids mum asked you not to give him dinner I think she'd be legitimately put out if she hears you have given him a hot dinner, even if it is early.

I'd also maybe pull it back to late lunchtime, eg. 2.30/3.
Longer gap to get hungry again then.

I don't know why, but cheese on toast or cheese toasties would feel OK to me, more snack than meal somehow.
Or maybe the snack bits of fruit amd veg snacks with some straps of mini pizza or something if you want sth hot.

If they’re having dinner later, I’d just offer fruit and a yoghurt.

An odd post, why are you choosing to add additional items when you know its two fish fingers and 1-2 tablespoons of beans.

If you look at her replies, the OP is doing beans and fishfingers anyway (perfectly fine obviously..no one really cares either way) no matter what any one on this thread suggests, and is put out if anyone suggests anything else. I'm not sure why she started this thread really. She doesn't seem to be getting anything out of it so it's a waste of everyone's time.

no Need for a 4th meal of the day! If you want to give them something hot then a mug of soup maybe?

Is breadsticks , cheese and fruit less than 2 fishfingers and a scoop of beans? No.
It's not automatically more food just because it's hot.

Three breadsticks 75 calories
an apple around 95 calories
cheese, lets say the size of one of those cheese portions in a net, a small match box 83 calories

So a total of 253 calories, it would also take up a decent amount of stomach space, fruit due to fibre does, breadsticks are also quite big.

two fish fingers 115 calories
Two table spoons of beans 100g is 81 calories, so two table spoons would be around 45-65 calories depending on the spoon. So a total if we go for the upper end of 180 calories. The actual food is smaller in mass too, I imagine similar fibre from the beans.

So you’d be pissed off they had fed them the smaller option with fewer calories?

So is it about the 'cooking', which is hardly a cost or effort seeing as every man and his dog has an air fryer these days?

Otherwise 'bread sticks, cheese cubes and fruit' isn't rationally any less 'dinner' than a couple of fish fingers and a small amount of beans.

I wouldn’t cook for a snack. If my child had come over for a play date whereby I’d said please don’t give them dinner are are going to grandparent and then they came home saying they’d had fish fingers and beans (perfectly nutritious meal) then I’d be pissed off and they wouldn’t be coming again. Just do some bread sticks cheese cubes and fruit. Not all 4 year olds eat a lot.

Very odd that people are horrified at the suggestion of fish fingers and a few beans are in large suggesting foods with a higher calorie content, a very bizarre attitude.

OP if the parents are dim enough to think two fish fingers and a few spoons of beans is more significant than an apple, some cheese and a bit of toast/crackers they’re clearly not the brightest!

Absolutely, mine and their playmates were ravenous after school. I always had a platter for them on arrival: fruit, crackers, piece of cheese or slice of ham at 4ish after they'd chased back from school and before tearing round the garden for two hours before tea at 6 which was hot and proper.

She can be fed up with a different babysitter next time then.
No way would I be doing more favours for anyone who got that upset about a fishfinger. Dear me.
This thread has been eye opening for me. Who knew there were so many uptight people hung up on designated (usually empty carby) snack foods. Wow.

In West Hampstead everything had to be fully home made. So I would check.

Then we moved out of London..........

Fwiw I offer mine food every 2-3 hours/whenever I'm getting something myself. DC eats what they want. Food choices aside, it doesn't sound like a lot of food you plan to serve. My kid would be fairly hungry by 3-4pm if last meal was 11:30/noon. I find it weird that some here seem to be quite controlling of food for their growing children and would be angry if their hungry child ate enough at 4 to not want dinner at 6. Maybe the child's needs are to have more of a meal at 4 and a snack at 6? Maybe they need two substantial meals? Needs change, too. I certainly wouldn't get pissed off over it.

BTW, can you take my dc for an afternoon next week?
I can reciprocate the week after. 😉

You asked the mother if you should feed her child dinner.
She has then unmistakably said ‘no thank you’ ( and for very good reasons)
You are going to ignore her and feed him anyway.
What you are planning is not a snack. It’s a meal.
It is not about calories or nutrients.
I don’t believe cooking fish fingers and beans is easier than a little bit of cheese, bread sticks and apples.
Just be prepared for her to be a bit fed up with you.
I would be.