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AIBU?

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Original poster

To feel absolutely pathetic that I can't manage full time work

106 replies

Gerrymandering1 · 13/11/2024 02:53

I increased my hours at work to 32 a few months ago (so not even full time) from 3 days. I feel as though I'm not coping with things since I did this.

Our youngest has ASD and requires extra care and support compared to a usual 9 Yr old. The eldest seems to be going off the rails now. Husband has chronic kidney disease and is so tired constantly. I've been needing him to do more with me not being here and feel awful.

Maybe a wfh job would work but this job is constantly out of the house all day.

We could manage financially, u just feel I should be able to cope with these hours.

OP posts:
Original poster
Gerrymandering1 · 13/11/2024 03:08

Thank you both. I'm just not coping at all. I just feel like I'm neglecting my family now as I'm so exhausted. I've stopped exercising ans cooking so feel dreadful.
I've just applied for DLA for the youngest so that might come through. I just managed so much better doing three days.
I'll speak to my manager tomorrow who will not be happy but I'm not coping like this.

OP posts:
MollyButton · 13/11/2024 03:06

I think you are pretty amazing given those circumstances to even manage 32 hours!
I only do 30, and them hybrid (some wfh and some in office), and I don't have the other caring responsibilities you have.
When my children were younger and having issues I wasn't even working and was still incredibly stressed.

DurinsBane · 13/11/2024 03:06

I don’t know any couples with young kids where both work full time, and if the one who doesn’t, does work outside the house at all, it is for less than 32 hours a week. So you are doing more hours than most I know!

XChrome · 13/11/2024 03:02

Why should you be able to cope? It sounds exhausting to me. It sounds like you're a caregiver not just for your children, but for your husband, and you work 32 hours a week. Anyone would be tired and fed up with a grind like that.

Cherryana · 13/11/2024 03:01

i think there comes a time when you have to listen to your ‘self’ and not live according to the ‘shoulds’.

If three days was the point where you thrived rather than survived - that is worth more than money.

RafaistheKingofClay · 13/11/2024 02:56

You have a lot going on it isn’t a surprise you feel like this.

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