SIL describing herself as "retired" pissing me off

@pepperminticecream Not one of your posts suggest you think you are a superior parent. Ignore @mayorofcasterbridge their response to you is completely unhinged.

You're jealous, admit it.🙄

Who cares? Live and let live.

Same! I think my brain would have succumbed to mush (it's on its way out as it is!!)

I know two of them cut their first tooth at 5 months and the other at 7 months. I think I know which was which but I couldn't honestly be sure. I kept all their baby teeth but then I mixed the fuckers up and didn't know whose was whose or which tooth was which, then somebody told me it was gross to keep them and I eventually threw them all out! I have to think carefully about their birthdays because they're all similar numbers but I do usually get them right. Probably was the WOHM that did it.... yawn!

I might not have seen their first steps - I will never know - but the first step I saw them take was good enough for me.

But they grew up with lots of love, laughter, support in a happy home with the best that we could provide for them, so I'm fine with that!

Yeah, tbh I don't personally know any SAHMs with kids in school who won't be extremely well off as a pensioner. I'm sure they exist - just I don't know any.

Yes, to all of this.

You haven't retired if you've (pretty much) never worked.
I get what you mean Op, this isn't about the kids etc, it's her saying she's retired when she's not grafted in a full time job for decades.

it just depends on how you look at life. Everyone is different and people gain self-purpose in different ways.

Can’t agree with you on that.

WOW, you make many many assumptions. My life has not been smooth and I don't count on it being smooth. You have absolutely zero idea about how hard I have worked to get to where I am or what I have faced.

I am grateful for where I am now BECAUSE my life hasn't been easy. There isn't one moment that I am not grateful to be alive or have my children, those things weren't always a given for me.

You need serious help with the anger, passive aggression and assumptions you are making.

Thank you. This has been a thoroughly depressing thread to read. Vandana Shiva has written and spoken on the topic of how the world has been shaped into a masculine profit and product oriented project, and how the narrative was roughly changed into "women don't work", "women's work is not work", "care is not work". It's just horrible seeing how this attitude persists. Work that's always been dominated by women is STILL seen, even on a site called MUMSnet, as being lesser, the equivalent of having "no success in the working world", and "life of leisure". Christ no wonder happiness levels in westernised countries are so low.

You have no idea what lies ahead of you in life! If you are fortunate, the road will always be smooth!

There is not one thing I have said that would imply I consider myself to be better vs. working parents. In fact, I think working parents are amazing. As I said twice, the home keeping and activities that I love doing with my children are much harder to maintain when I am working (which I have also said multiple times that I also do).

No it doesn't. It literally doesn't. The people who know @SacreBleugh and who's opinions count all know her work history and parenting history. Another woman saying she is retired doesn't change any of that.

This, I have a terrible memory. If I’d stayed home with my kids for years I feel the days would all have blended into one in my head!

I also have a pension. My very well supported pension, savings account and stocks will keep me very comfortable well into elder-hood. And the time I get to spend with my children will be worth more than that.

I'm not angry at all. I just think you're talking a load of bull. You quite obviously consider yourself far superior to WOHMs and I am one without one single sliver of regret!

@PureBoggin
' The majority of women are somewhere in between and we're mostly all just trying to get through the day as unscathed as possible. So what if someone wants to avoid awkward conversations, judgement and derision. Who actually cares. It will not change the reality of YOUR life.'
For me, this is the most sensible and reasonable comment on this thread.

The bitterness and jealousy on some posts is awful.......live and let live.

Agreed. I'm amazed very few have commented on it. So insulting to stay at home mothers.

She’s obviously had a leisurely life and is now saying she is retired as it sounds like she now deserves her leisure time. In your position I would also roll my eyes.

Absolutely no one on this thread has said that SAHMs are more admirable than WOHMs. It's been entirely the other way around. And believe it or not Mayor, no one really gives a shit whether you are impressed by them or not.

My point is that women like you are more than happy to exploit the labour of poorer women to make your life easier whilst berating women who opt out of providing cheap labour for anyone except their own family.

It doesn't bypass you but it does mean you have less time with your DC than I do and your DC have less time with you.

It annoys her because it takes away from her hard work.

The “rat race” isn’t for me either but I can’t opt out or the bills won’t get paid.

Do you honestly think if you have several children you remember every single minute?!

The pension is for me though. I am looking forward to enjoying that.

And again, no one has said anything to imply what you are posting about. You clearly have a major issue with stay at home mums and you should examine that and your anger elsewhere.

Every person posting here has their own family, needs, financial needs, etc. and they will need to form a life that works to meet those needs. My needs and the needs of my family are being met through the work I do at home.

I don't think I am superior because I cook from scratch, I think I can do all of those things because I am a stay at home mum and my time goes to things like that. As I said, things aren't as easy when I decide to take on a freelance project.