To wonder if obesity is unattractive to most men?

I like men with a bit of chonk on them but I don't think it works both ways. Men tend to be shallow and see themselves as better looking than they actually are, in general I would say.

I’m v turned off by gym rats and people who play a lot of sport so having a compatible lifestyle matters more to me than having the fittest body. Taking care of your body is attractive though.

I think there will be more women that find obese men unattractive than there are men that find obese women unattractive. Some men are in to a larger woman as they prefer curves. There may also be something about not feeling the need to have the perfect body themselves.
Obesity can look very different on people too, I've known obese women who have very pretty faces, dress well and are confident and fairly fit. I've seen them get male attention. I've also known obese women who struggle with their mobility and wear plain baggy clothing, they don't get much attention.

🙄

Remind me if that Titania McGrath tweet,

‘If you only date people you are attracted to, you need to ask yourself why you are so shallow and bigoted’

Oh and no issues with sex thanks; I’m surprisingly bendy for a big girl, and he doesn’t have any trouble getting where he needs to be.

I’m not that confident going on top but I never have been tbh, big or small. I don’t know quite how big your arse needs to be for it to impede access from behind, but I can tell you 18-20 ain’t it.

I’m size 18-20 and my DP is tall and skinny. We met a couple of years ago and and while I don’t think he was particularly looking for a fat lass he certainly seems to find me attractive.

He has commented about being concerned for my health on occasion, but tbh he’s had his own health issues lately, so I think he realises he may not be quite the shining example of good health that he seemed to think he was! He insists it isn’t anything to do with attraction, which is just as well, as I’ve pointed out my stretch marks don’t look any better without the padding behind them, my magnificent boobs lose their bountiful bounce and my face will look 10 years older if I lose weight, so I’m quite happy as I am.

I’m a definite “larger lady” and encounter precisely zero of those issues.

My DP’s ex wife was 26 stone (I’m not quite that size), and they have my DSs together, so evidently managed.

No men won't 'shag anything'
Most men still need a visual stimulus to get aroused, and for a lot of men an obese body won't provide this. Additionally, having sex with a woman who is obese can be awkward and difficult. Woman on top can be uncomfortable, from behind can be mechanically impossible depending on the size of the bum/thighs and likewise with missionary depending on the belly.

Men will shag anything but might be more fussy over who they commit to.

Obviously a lot of people don't find obesity attractive in men or women Some do however. I am a bit surprised at the OPs surprise.

Says more about them than you 99. Why would you want to make yourself more attractive for male approval? Do it for yourself, hold your head up and be proud to be a woman. These men should be lucky you even acknowledge them in passing.
A lot of men don't worry about making themselves more presentable for women, imo it is mainly men who have b.o and look as if they need a good wash, clean clothles and a decent razor.

I would say that many people are not particularly attracted to truly obese people.
It’s not just men.
BUT obviously many/most overweight people have happy? Loving marriages etc.
In my opinion it’s much more about confidence, how you feel about yourself and how you project yourself.
If you believe you’re attractive, then lots and lots of other people will believe it too.

This is good advice @Thatsmefatty .

Society is far too aggressively geared towards belittling weight but there are far worse traits than being cuddly. A couple of my dearest friends struggle with weight. They are magnificent people. I can’t sing their praises highly enough in terms of how giving and strong they are for those around them. I also know a handful of small-minded, small waisted types who are so self-absorbed they probably wouldn’t help a toddler across a road safely.

Just keep it in perspective when judging yourself.

Exactly. I am a man and I find all of the women in the pictures that were posted earlier extremely attractive. Fabulous figures but all exuding confidence too. If you've got it, flaunt it.

This. I know its an old saw but loving yourself as you are is the important thing

Apols for poor grammar

I think this is what matters when it comes to being physically attractive is physical proportions.

If you are proportionate or an hourglass shape this is more attractive than, say, a woman with skinny arms and legs but a big belly, or very large hips and legs and a small top half. I am not trying to offend anyone.

Me ex SIL was big but she had a lovely face and was very attractive. She didn't carry any weight on her face - didn't have a double chin - which I think also makes a difference how you are viewed when it comes to being overweight.

The images that someone put on here earlier all had hourglass figures and faces with no double chins. And they are attractive,.

I am a size 18/20 now and about 4 stones overweight. I am also in my 60's and struggle to lose weight.

Each to their won I suppose. Just my POV.

Are you, yourself, attracted to obese men?

I think when you get to a very unhealthy weight (whether you are male or female) you are perceived as less attractive. This is not really surprising, we have evolved to seek out a healthy partner as a way to increase the chance of healthy offspring.

However within the healthy range there are plenty of men who prefer curvier/heavily built women - you don't have to be a size 8.

I think most people find healthy weight people more attractive, but attraction is about far more than just weight and there are plenty of gorgeous overweight people.

The impression I get is that most men find fashion models and similar ie. the look that so many women feel pressured to try and emulate, too skinny. I think most men like a woman who has a bit more flesh on her and of course, there is a whole spectrum of shapes and sizes.
I agree with a previous post, confidence and an engaging personality can make a big difference.

I'm sure your partner has some good points, but I would find his hypocrisy more unattractive than his weight!

It's personal preferences. My partner is overweight but wouldn't date a woman who is. He doesn't find overweight women attractive, regardless of personality, I've questioned him and debated but it's his preference. He just doesn't find overweight women attractive. That's him.
I don't find bald men attractive. So I understand. Luckily I'm a size 6/8 and he has a full head of hair - both 53

I guess it depends what they (men) look like themselves. We generally end up with people of a similar attractiveness to ourselves.

If someone is pregnant I would assume they’ve been together a good while, years even so I think that is different. They could have been slim but then ended up obese but their DP loves them at that point as we need more than initial attraction to maintain a relationship.

The clue is in the title. Obese. We’re not talking about a few pounds. Obese is more than being overweight and as much as people argue you can be healthy and obese, the statistics say that obesity causes so many health problems.

Obese can be anything from 1.5-2stone overweight. I was classed as obese at 11.5stone (I am short though). Other people who are obese may not look obese as they carry it well, but they're still technically obese.

In relation to the op's question. I work in a health related setting and I regularly see obese pregnant women (and statistics would also show this figure is rising) so there must be many men who do find it attractive, or are just not bothered by it.