I know I've been foolish and can't stop kicking myself for my stupid actions, and guess I just need a sounding board..
I'm not in the best place just now, I've devoted the past 10 years to keeping my kids good, working full time and trying to keep a relationship going with a man who I now realise was extremely abusive in all sorts of ways.
To cut a long story short I'm now completely alone, kids have done very well bless them and both are now at uni, my 2 beloved cats sadly passed away within 6 months of each other and after being assaulted one time too many my partner is now an ex, I'm homeless but staying with my lovely cousin as a temporary arrangement.
My self esteem is rock bottom and I'm very lonely- I honestly do not have one real friend as became very isolated. Imagine my happiness when I bravely went into a pub for a quiet drink (alone!!) as I couldn't stand the loneliness any longer and immediately got approached by a nice man who bought me a drink and chatted to me like I was a human being..
Move on a few drinks- he tells me I'm lovely and would like my number- I (hic) gave him it then he asks for a kiss- I allowed a peck on the cheek- he asked if I would go outside for a proper kiss but I declined, as I didn't know him..
I went home after a bit (alone) and the next day he messages me- it became apparent that he's married- I told him I wasn't interested and a relationship was not possible and he should sort it out with his wife, it got weird- and he wouldn't take no for an answer so I blocked him.
Next thing I know is I'm getting abusive texts from his wife accusing me of being a home wrecker - someone filmed him kissing me in the pub and she somehow got my number- I don't know how as nobody knows me.. Apparently he's left her.
I told her what went on (nothing) and although I felt for her, and thought her husband's actions were disgusting I was not responsible for his behaviours.
I now feel unable to go out, I'm so anxious and feel like I've done something awful- what of she sees me and beats me up? what if he sees me and does the same? what should I do?
was I wrong to speak to a man in the pub? Should I keep indoors and avoid this from happening again? I just need to meet people and make some friends- I didn't expect all this!