For context- me and ex split 2 years ago and now live at opposite ends of London. We have one son together who is turning 9 in January. No additional needs, pretty smart kid but has his moments of stupidity like all young boys do. He isn’t a new relationship but lives with his 2 now grown daughters (23 and 19). I’m in a new relationship and very unexpectedly pregnant and due Christmas Day.
We split custody 50/50- 3 days each and swap. We have sorted this out between ourselves, no need for courts and it has worked so far.
Turned up yesterday evening to pick up DS-DS came to the door, seemed a bit shady, shut the door grabbed his bag and came out of the door and shut it behind him so I couldn’t see inside. I told him I wanted to speak to his dad- panicked look in his eye and told me he was in the bath. Thought no more of it.
Fast forward to this morning- get a call from exs neighbour (I lived there with him when we were together and we are still in touch) to be informed he has been leaving DS alone during the weekend/school holidays and when he's at school he’s been coming home and is often on his own up to 2/3 hours until his dad/one of his sisters returns.
I am seething. Had a go at neighbour for not telling me because this has been going on for months apparently but do appreciate it isn’t her fault/she probably felt she was stepping on toes/at least she has finally told me.
Not confronted ex yet and not been able to pick up the phone and talk to anyone else about it. I’m shaking with anger still and I got the call as I came in from the school run at 9.05.
I don’t know what to do. DS is going to throw a tantrum because he’s finding it hard being away from his dad, especially now I have another baby on the way and obviously won’t see the fault in it but I don’t see how I can trust him to be with his Dad anymore.
AIBU?