DS made racist comment at school

It's frustrating because without full facts, it's been assumed to a large number of parents in DSs class.

Also, imagine what other parents will be thinking about us as parents?! If I heard something like that, I know what I would be thinking...

Which none of our family are in the slightest.

I hope the Headteacher will not be available. I hope they are focused on educating their students and creating a safe space for all children irrespective of skin colour. If parents have a WhatsApp group you need to approach those parents, its not the schools job to do it.

Update

Teacher has sent me a lengthy message back to say she was aware of an incident at school where DS had commented on a child's skin colour, but this was not malicious and deal that with straight away with DS apologising for this and that the children seemed fine.

Teacher says she believes stories have been miscommunicated with children at home and has told me not to worry as it will be addressed with the children's parents involved.

They are also sending out communications about acceptable chat in WhatsApp over any bullying allegations and talk of individual pupils

They're facilitating a meeting with me tomorrow with the teachers involved so they can explain everything fully to me

Its not ablest to expect the OP to do better on the subject of racism with her DS. Everything she has written here suggests she does not have the skills to do that herself. She is obsessed with getting back at the WhatsApp group, yet here she is calling them out rather than focusing on the girl who was affected and how she can help her son learn from this. As for the son, he in on the Autistic spectrum but this does not mean there should not be reasonable expectations or consequences. The opportunity to learn on this occasion is being squandered

On disabiliy. So many people calling him a disabled 7 year old. None of the individuals I know like to be reduced to just being called 'disabled', it's reductive. They and their parents have fought hard for them to be able to reach their potential and be included when their ASD was being used to restrict their growth and make their world smaller. So don't @me about disabilities when you are being so reductive.

I’m sorry, but you don’t have a clue. Zero comparison. I say this as someone who is brown and whose child has also said similar. Although these comments did make me chuckle, they are really not the same, believe me.

That all said, this is a young autistic child who is clearly saying things without even knowing what he is saying. He is an autistic child. He tans easily and doesn’t like it.

I imagine it is bloody hard being the parent of an autistic child, and I feel for the op. This is a lot to navigate, but she is taking it very seriously, so I think it will all come out well. Good luck OP!

Could it be that your DS has actually spent some time with someone who is racist OP? Perhaps heard another kid in the playground say something similar, because they've perhaps heard a parent say it? Maybe it's worth asking him where he's heard someone say something like this? Just a thought. I hope that you're able to put this matter to bed without any further nastiness from anyone toward your son, as he clearly doesn't understand what he's done.

I suppose that's up to school to decide as literally anyone can make a group - it's not really able to be policed. I do think parents need reminded though that issues with individual pupils should be dealt with the parent or the school directly, especially about issues like these, as they can escalate quite easily

IMO the terms has been used on this thread in a reductive manner. I am not telling you how you should I identify. I am telling you that I have been told that the term 'disabled' used as their primary descriptor is considered reductive. They prefer their disability to be acknowledged by its name ie autistic spectrum disorder/asd or adhd or social communication disorder etc. You do you. You don't speak for all people with disabilities any more that I speak for all ethnic minorities.

However you are feeling about the situation… imagine how the girl felt when your son said that to her?! I’d be livid if it were one of my children, despite the parent not acting in the way you would like, they were probably bouncing off the ceiling when their child told them!

Hopefully, as member of staff on chat group it will have been reported to the school already.

Is it worth your job being part of a toxic group?

IF he said it! He doesn't deserve to be vilified before it's even been looked into! Children lie or wrong convey things all the time! The parent should absolutely have gone to the school immediately, not gone ranting to other parents on social media before anything was even looked into! The amount of things my son has come home and told me about other kids is shocking but I would never dream of starting a witch-hunt in this way.

Which is fine to do; that's your choice. But it's also fine to be a part of these things IF used appropriately and ready to do the responsible thing if necessary.

Even the Head of a local prep school is part of a parent whatsapp group with the other parents in her year group; her child is in the year group.