DS made racist comment at school

I disagree with you and I am brown. Just because somebody was mean to you and made unkind comment about skin colour decades ago does not mean this kid is doing the same.

And autism is relevant here..Op has punished her son and asked him to apologise to the girl. Little girl's mum has not wrote on the whatapp, its parents of a 3rd child. Also what is said on whatsapp and what op's son says are two different versions. So she also has a right to care for her son. He did not tell little girl's skin is dirty, nor did he say he will exclude her on the basis of her skin. So it's different from your experience.

Educate yourself it's a racial slur it's offensive.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/newsbeat-30999175

The school can say what they like, they can put out communication on their views until they’re blue in the face but this will never stop parents having private Watsapp groups. As I said, they can’t control what other parents say on groups. The OP wasn’t on the group, she was sent screenshots of it. Absolutely no-one can control what’s said on Watsapp chats whether others like it or not. Many times I’ve seen a HT put out communication only to backfire on them, parents do not like being dictated to especially regarding what’s said on private chats/snap chat etc. SLT can, to an extent, control what happens in the school setting but certainly not outwith that setting. I hardly see how the child was “tried in a kangaroo court“ on Watsapp. Yes, some parents may have shared their views with others but he’s hardly been “tried’ for goodness sake. I would assume all the upset parents approached the school regarding the comments made and have now been assured that the situation was dealt with at the time. I was SLT for many years and it’s not unusual for a group of parents to have Watsapp chats going.

Yes this

I wouldn’t have punished him at all. Children shouldn’t be punished for their innocence- that’s harmful. He simply needed some education about race and when and how it’s appropriate to ask certain questions.

Good. So glad. Maybe all the witch-hunters on here will back off now.

Then again, maybe not. 🙄

You are being unnecessarily harsh to OP and acting superior.
I am brown skin but don't understand this need to put down a woman who has done nothing wrong and admits her son made a mistake. She has educated her child on skin colour but 7 is still very young and they are still learning.

Are you kidding? Autism is irrelevant here? No. And stop it with the faux-nice 'gently'. Autism IS entirely relevant here. I can't believe that you are dismissing this child's disability. You do know what autism is don't you...? Because the fact that you think it isn't relevant suggests that you don't.

God, there's some ignorant people around.

I have had a few similar incident, where I was accused of something I didn't say. The kid accusing me was the over imaginative, mischievous kind. I was the quieter kid so I couldn't get my word against him.

This

Mum of little girl did not share on WhatsApp. It was some other kid.

I remember when I was little, my cousin completely changed what I said and told his mother. He was the one who was bully.

Op's son could be completely in wrong or it could be the other child heard Op's son say 'brown skin' and added extra bit that he said he does not want to play with little girl because her skin is brown.

this exactly. This is a 7 year old 😢

I mean what I said thanks.

The inside of the tape dispenser fell on my foot during a lesson. The kids started shouting that I'd said a rude word or sworn and telling their parents this had happened. Except I hadn't. I actually said something like "Well that hurt." I had adult staff to back me up too.

This is a totally unacceptable witch hunt. Your son said nothing of the sort. The teacher hasn't spoken to you about it because it never happened. This needs to be nipped in the bud - ideally in assembly where your son's name is declared innocent. And the parents need to learn some manners. Your child has ASD. What's their excuse for completely unacceptable behaviour and lack of social skills? Do they think he's feral?!

Your son has nothing to apologise for. I think his class and their parents owe him a huge apology in person.

So much apologia on this thread. Attitudes really coming out!

I would have told others in the group to grow the F up and pack it in until the facts from the school were known. I also wouldn't indulge my kid who says something controversial about another kid until I had the facts. But then, I am not a childish gossip.

@ellie09 I would maybe do work with him on how changes are not a bad thing. I posted earlier about a similar reaction my niece has to spots. My sister is doing lots of social stories and science work about the changes puberty will bring. You do have a while but they will start learning about it in school.

We have books we use in our book corners so the children are used to seeing them all year round. This is just one example and others may know better ones.

OP's son isn't accountable for what the other kids were saying, he can only be held to account for his own actions. Clearly the school felt whatever was said was so inconsequential and minor there was nothing to report therefore nothing to talk to him about or guide him on.

Sounds like the school are doing the right thing by addressing it in school through lessons and putting out guidance on the dangers of dealing with incidents in school via Whatsapp.

As your son did nothing wrong, you need to tell him you were wrong for punishing him. I cannot believe that adults made such a pigs ear of this situation.

I'm not saying sexism is the same as racism

why isn’t sexism the same as racism? Why do we correctly recognise that one is profoundly wrong and just tolerate/ laugh about the other ?

Replies from harridans on this post lol....
There is absolutely nothing wrong with children curiously asking about skin colour and if people think there is, that is them projecting their own insecurities and experiences through their own lens. It ain't about you. Narcissists aplenty on this site.

lol, ok. She's already said she was appalled and spoke to him. How about you rein it in a little. He is also 7 and grown ass adults are bitching about him in a Whatsapp group. You'd be in there like a shot, I can tell. You live for it.