To want to just avoid people as much as I can until I die now

It’s not just technology but Covid that has ruined things and made people fearful of interacting.

I work with people who won’t answer the phone if they don’t recognise the number calling them. One person lost out on an interview with a company she really wanted to work for.

There are lots of good and friendly people out there. But if you’re closed to social interactions you won’t find out. Be open, be respectful, be kind.

I’m working in a new city. Very helpful young chap saw I was struggling with the beastly self service tills and stayed to help.

On a return train from seeing the new office, we were delayed, missed our connection. A young chap got talking to me about his physics degree, his girlfriend, all sorts.

I wouldn’t miss out on people for the world. Yes of course there are arseholes out there, I’m probably one of them sometimes. We’re social animals, nothing wrong with a bit of alone time but we need society and it needs us.

You should start a thread @PoorUncleBarry ! We’ll all commiserate with you.

Yes some people can just slide off the earth but most are ok. Some have been helping me and some are just cheery people so they are ok by me!

Or you could just own your own misanthropy.

If literally everyone you meet is an asshole, or everyone apart from your DH and children, then you’re either incredibly unlucky in your extended family, social circles, children’s friends’ parents, colleagues, neighbours etc etc, or it’s you.

Obviously there are awful people, but no, ‘most people’ are not ‘awful stressful rude shovey mean’.

I like people but I’d rather they didn’t come into my house.

Just don't come back whingeing in however many years when your kids are grown and left home, and you suddenly realise you're on your own for most of the rest of your life.

Ha, mine left about 15 years ago, I've had a lovely time since. Not everyone needs people around. I'm happy with my pets. I'd rather be alone (I'm not as it happens) than with arseholes. #livingmybestlife

No I actually don't feel like this. Which kind of surprises me but having read all the posts, no, I wouldn't want to isolate myself that much

So why did you come on here to discuss this with other people if you don't like other people?

And why are other people who don't like other people responding to you?

Shouldn't you all be playing with your pets?

Yanbu. I'm a naturally outgoing and exuberant person but the older I get the more reclusive I have become. People are often awful; selfish, shallow, feckless, dishonest and willfully bloody ignorant.
The pool of people I am willing to spend my free time with has got smaller and smaller. I'm not mourning anyone.

No. I think you need to be over 40. I am 57.

Sounds wonderful!

I agree with you, but - you can choose how you live. Landlines still exist - I have a landline (which I use as mobile signal is rubbish where I am). I use a paper diary and a paper address book. Nothing stopping you walking to your local shop and buying a paper. I have several old friends who live a long way away with whom I exchange proper letters, which I save.

Not sure you can singlehandedly bring back paper savings books and phone boxes. But you can be selective re TV and prioritise living immediately - joining local groups, befriending neighbours, lots of in-person social activity, volunteering. Plenty of others out there doing it already.

I work in a people-heavy job and I am glad to leave them behind to go home. But without friends, neighbours, family, connection... what is the point? We're social animals and we kid ourselves if we think we can do without. I always find it funny watching 'simple living' YouTube channels, valuing introspection and solitude - when everything they do is designed for other people's likes.

Hmmmm I've been accused of being a bot more than once on here.

I'm with the majority of yous, people free life for me.

I have a few friends that I like to spend time with and I don’t mind bumping into them when out but there’s a lot of people I don’t want to see or bump into, I don’t tend to go out to places I’m likely to bump into them. I think I would get pretty lonely if I avoided everyone 😬

Tech for sure ! Covid . Mainly the state of the UK the government and the World in general

This thread makes me so sad. There are many many many wonderful people out there! Human connection is needed by us all!

Admittedly Of course, the people in power are loathsome and there are also a number of nobs out there. But so many wonderful people!

I work in a school so maybe I’m not seeing the breadth of society - but most teenagers are brilliant!

Ooof, insensitive, turning this into OP's issue in a world of conflict, Trump has been voted in for the second time, the economy is screwed, and people are becoming more and more grabby and superficial.

I am so sorry about your diagnosis, @drivinmecrazy

I remember a weird dichotomy when DH was diagnosed with an aggressive cancer. About 80% of the well wishers are reading from a script, and that does produce a great feeling of loneliness. Especially because some were people of whom we had reason to expect more.

But then there are the others, and they aren’t always who you would expect them to be. IBTW DH has been fine so far since his initial course of treatment. I hope that your treatment and good people in your life will see you through this.

I have found my people. I wish I could take the few people I love and move away from the majority of others. At work I’m surrounded by egos or people seeking validation all the time, talking about themselves constantly. It’s exhausting. Many of my friends have started to compete with each other on who has the best life / most money so I want to ditch them too. Even out and about I find people unbearably loud and often awful / self-absorbed.

1982 or even 1992 would be fine by me.

Me too. Genuinely.

Yanbu.

I love the idea of people, but hate the reality. I'll tolerate the well-intentioned in small doses and try to reciprocate.

Cats are much, much nicer to be around.

No. If anything, we all need to get out more and see and interact with more people, not fewer. Yes, others can be annoying but we have to be more tolerant of differences and learn to understand people outside of our immediate social circle, otherwise we end up lonely, isolated, depressed and more open to extremism.

Me too. Of course there are some arseholes but the (only) joy of menopause is that I am now assertive enough to tell the arseholes that they are being arseholes and not bother with them any more.

Most people are not arseholes. Most people are friendly and warm and nice to chat to. Most are not going to rob you or stab you.

However, you are on MN, where opening your front door is seen as an extremely bold move, if the caller has not texted in triplicate first. You do you. Just don't come back whingeing in however many years when your kids are grown and left home, and you suddenly realise you're on your own for most of the rest of your life.

I sometimes think I will be the last person to still be preferring offline interaction to online, newspapers to digital news, walking to driving....

There are real people behind the words on a screen. Well except for the AI bots.

I like people anyway. Without people I'd be a bit sad.