to not let neighbour use my shower!

Do they have to bring their own chairs and plates too?

That was an actual emergency. Shower not working, when you still have hot water, is not an emergency.

I'm older generation too, and I grew up with neighbours helping each other out all the time. Very much more than they do now.

One of our neighbours who only had an outside toilet, used to have a bath at our house once a week!

People have their own opinions of course, but saying no to such a request just strikes me as unnecessarily mean and selfish.

In the aftermath of some fairly major storms a few years ago our house was one of the few in the village which didn't lose power, it's on a different circuit or whatever to most of the houses round about so our lights stayed on.

I let neighbours charge phones/use the shower/ fill flasks etc because, well, why wouldn't you? Just gave them a towel and let them get on with it, and praise be, nobody got ill due to alien bodily runoff into our drains.

I wouldn't be keen on this either- I'm a bit messy and disorganised I couldn't cope with having to let someone in my home that regularly haha but I've also been without a shower for 3 weeks and had to rely on my kind family and in-laws so I get it on her end too.

Double check if she has an insurance claim ongoing though- if she does then she'd be entitled to accommodation or even a pass to a gym to use the showers. while hers is out of use.

Preferably, yes.

It's horrible having no hot water, so if you can help her out it would be a nice thing to do. Maybe she asked you because she thinks you are a nice person

She does have hot water. It’s her shower that’s not working,not her boiler.

Other than perhaps saying that your water tank is tiny so there's only about 10 mins of decent hot water so she'll have to be fairly quick, and you'd prefer a specific time of day I'd happily agree to this.

Eye on the long game. What goes around comes around and in the grand scheme of things its not a huge ask. My washing machine blew up recently and it was a two week lead time on a replacement. Finding laundromats and the time to run around with a family level of weekly laundry was a huge headache. My sisters freezer recently crashed and burned and she had to call in favours to avoid losing the entire contents.

Excellent. Anyone else?

The thing is people tend to disappear. We’ve had people say they’ll help others out before and then mysteriously disappear. Most people saying they would do it are chatting shite.

Sure. I'm in Birmingham. PM me if relevant, OP.

Yes this. 😂😂😂

Come on all those who are quick to volunteer OPs shower and time, where are you all based. We will have OPs neighbour sorted in no time.

Yes. I’ve done similar for neighbours in the past, not so much around here yet as fairly recently moved, but at our previous house. I was a community responder during the height of the pandemic. Various things. But apparently, I’m an awful person generally ☺️

Presumably you VOLUNTEERED to be a community responder? This woman is asking for a favour, so the request is being brought to you, rather than you signing up for something you want to do.

The litmus test, I suppose, is whether you would do a kindness for a neighbour that doesn't particularly take your fancy but would mean a lot to someone in a tricky situation.

It's 20 minute maximum every other day. Not much to ask really.

Why don't you give her a set time slot, so she can't just bowl up.

It's horrible having no hot water, so if you can help her out it would be a nice thing to do. Maybe she asked you because she thinks you are a nice person

Having said that, I've been in this situation and wouldn't have dreamt of asking my neighbour. My neighbour was an absolute cunt though.

I think you're being quite unkind, but it's your right of course.

This ^

A decent neighbour is worth their weight in gold, and I think if you say no, don't be surprised if things get frosty.
Like others have said, give her a set time she's welcome to come. Make it a time that suits you.

No hot water is quite different to shower not working though.

😂😂

“Right’ goodness my grammar today!

My boiler broke down earlier this year and I couldn't get it sorted for 2+ weeks. It was horrible having no hot water and also having to keep asking family if we could come over for a shower. It felt like a real imposition...

So, I'd encourage you to say yes...

@HowIsItNovemberAlready @Bippy2024

Sure we could hire a hotel room or get a gym membership but there's the absence of a neighbourly relationship in that isn't there, and that's what Op is avoiding really.

It's not really about the shower and diseases is it, it's about not wanting to help someone in need in case 'they need to much'

I would argue that could be a simple conversation with the neighbour and the potential of a friendship.

Or yes, you could avoid that completely...

Most people really don't share your bizarre views and suspect of everyone's bodily run-off to be diseased.

Sorry, I've got to go and have a shower now, cheery bubbles!

Out of all these people that are so helpful, one must live near OP. Tell us where you are OP, I'm sure you'll be inundated with offers of showers that your neighbour can use. 😉

You’ve recently moved ? You made it sound like you’d lived there a while with your dog walks together comment?
You sound pretty against it, so just say No. don’t lie about being ill, just say you’re on annual leave and don’t want to be
ties into an arrangement as want to be able to pop in and out as you please and lay in or whatever …
I wouldn’t refuse a neighbour but then my bathroom is write by front door, I wouldn’t be so keen if my only shower was upstairs or an ensuite off my bedroom though.