For reporting my DH to the Health Visitor? What should I do?

Report to the school heath visitor then next thing you’ve got social on the phone. They are WORDS I don’t read anything about abuse neglect but he’s saying words. If you would report your own husband to xyz because of a few words then I’d suggest a divorce.

Oh right. It did sound as though you were using may in the sense of ‘even though’ rather than ‘possible’.
Absolutely agree about how feck is considered in Ireland.

Feck means to steal, which in turn comes from effect, which means to make happen.

surely everybody’s heard of feckless!

i don’t regard it as a swear word at all.

That's why I said 'may'! I think the main point stands, that amongst Irish people generally, it is considered a very light not-quite swear word that is warm rather than nasty in its intentions.

For Irish people it really is not at all the same as saying 'fuck', it may be derived from it in the distant past but has evolved to have a different tone and meaning.

I don’t think feck is derived from fuck, although it’s now often used as a much milder version of the latter in Ireland. But the etymology of the words is thought to be different.

Well that's in your opinion. For Irish people it really is not at all the same as saying 'fuck', it may be derived from it in the distant past but has evolved to have a different tone and meaning. Hiberno-english is quite a distinct thing and long may it and other variations continue. I can't imagine your disdain going down too well with your Irish friends and family so maybe keep it to yourself (for fecks sake 😜)

Haha can you really imagine any of the royals being anything less than MORTIFIED if their children said I want some fucking tea? These people all certainly do care, because it’s really bad manners. I care that my kids learn not to swear (not a royal obviously)
op: he doesn’t listen to you, he’s BLOCKED you, I think our marriage would be over if my husband blocked me on his phone?!

That must be because where you live, they're not just people, they're m&s people.

@CallMeCrazyButIDontLikeStoreBoughtPesto
LOL. Anywhere in public. The street, a restaurant, big Tesco, little Tesco. Surely you’ve heard people swear… in public? The mind does indeed boggle.

No, where I live people don't routinely swear in public. In pubs and clubs, yes. But I never hear swearing in my local Sainsburys or M&S, or even little Tesco.

Im a good mum I think and my sister is the best social worker who swears like a gutter rat I don’t think much needs to change when you have kids obviously you can’t party but I never did but now i do and with my kids at home in the navy is our song right now 😂 they don’t make them anymore

LOL. Anywhere in public. The street, a restaurant, big Tesco, little Tesco. Surely you’ve heard people swear… in public? The mind does indeed boggle.

Where on earth did your young child go that she heard swearing in public. And what films was she watching that had swearing in them. The mind boggles. Poor child.

I'm very sweary and DD was always informed these were bad words and she couldn't use them when she was small. She's an angel so she didn't. They will hear these words everywhere and they do not harm. I did make an effort to reduce my swearing but as I move managed to cut it out entirely and they were said around her in public or in films, it made more sense to make sure she knew they were no words she could say.

However, swearing AT kids and your husbands general other behaviour is a problem.

Do you or have you ever lived in Ireland??

Do you mean generally or genuinely btw? I have heard that people mix these up but I have never seen it.
I don't mix them up. If I did, your opinion of that would mean nothing to me.

Saying someone has ‘prissy ways’ is a revolting thing to say
Nonsense. The OP clearly demonstrated that both she and her parents have prissy ways. It's the correct word, look it up. 'Revolting'? Are you sure that's the word you mean?

Nobody I know however swore in front of young kids
Your lack of life experience does not impress me. And, as you are pedantic about words, 'kids' are baby goats. The offspring of human beings are children, even in households where they are raised to imagine that swearing is a greater offence than being rude to your own father.

Are you the kind of person who describes women who don’t like unusual sexual practices as ‘prudes’ too?
Clutching at straws here, I think. Why introduce a new topic? Go back and look at my posts. My opinions on 'unusual sexual practices' are clearly stated there.

People who do not like non-stop swearing ‘turn your stomach’? You must be a fragile sort, for all your swearing!
Prissy people turn my stomach. People who are overly concerned with what they think are 'manners'. Behaviour once found in the lower middle class, or some aspirational working class groups. Those people. The ones who will allow their child to insult her father whilst taking offence at swear words and 'reporting' Daddy to the Health Visitor.

Not fragile at all.

Have you had enough attention now?

How do you get on with the school and is your child swearing at school? There’s really nothing a hv or school can do but give advice on parents language. This might be enough for your dh. The school may want to see BOTH parents if your children are bringing the language into the classroom (which they inevitably will). If that doesn’t help imo you have a serious problem.

All the examples of 'adults cand do this and children can't' are nonsense when it comes to swearing

There is no such thing as 'adult language'. Words are words. They are all around us and children pick them up as they are supposed to. So if they constantly hear swearing it becomes perfectly normal to them and to tell them they can't say Fuck or Shit or whatever the word is, till they're older is absolutely ridiculous.

Hearing them once or twice has little impact, but hearing them all the time at home makes them perfectly normal and acceptable and it's ridiculous to expect them to have better control over their use than adults do

Does he swear in front of his own parents, grandparents, higher ups at work etc? I bet he can turn it off when he wants to.

So he swears AT them and your child is terrified of him??

You need to protect your children and leave

You've got to be kidding with this statement. This is so ignorant. It is not ingrained in Irish men to say fuck. Honestly if I see any more Irish bashing on this thread I'm about to lay into the English Lager louts everyone in Europe complains about 🙄

As an Irish person and who grew up with Irish parents, I can confirm that swear words were common place. I don’t actually agree with the stigma around swearing.

HOWEVER, it is one thing swearing in general conversation that children might hear and another completely to swear AT children. It sounds very belittling. Also you can’t tell a child off for copying your own behaviour!

blocking you on WhatsApp is childish and petty

If he's swearing at the kids.. thats not on. If he's swearing in general I would say they are grown up words and the children should use them till they are grown ups. Leave it at that . If it slips out don't worry just tell them wait till your grown up
Kids will hear it out the house too unfortunately. Chill out and don't open that can of worms officially ffs

I used to be married to an irish man. The "f" word is part of their vocabulary as in the Police Force and other macho organisations. There is nothing you can do, it's ingrained in them. Sorry but that's the way it is.

This isn't an Irish thing (I'm Irish and no one I knows swears around their children, unless by accident). This is just really bad parenting by your DH as it'll obviously end up getting them in trouble in school etc down the line when they copy him. I doubt reporting it will do anything as it's not anyone's job to tell a grown man to stop cursing 🙈. Not sure what to tell you other than this would drive me crazy too! Did he always swear loads?

Thank you. The "swearing is a sign of intelligence" trope which gets trotted out here is tedious.