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Original poster

To think primary schools now days are more misogynistic amongst the boys, than in the past?

161 replies

Thatcastlethere · 07/11/2024 19:23

I hate to be all 'back in the good old days' and tbh I don't even think it was that great in the past... I think I just expected it to be better now days.
But am I wrong for feeling like there's been a massive upsurge in misogynistic feeling amongst primary age boys?
My two eldest are at primary school. It's a state school but it's regarded as a good school in a very middle class area. It's also considered a faintly hippy/alternative place.
Yet some of the things I've seen and heard regarding my 9yo son and my 6yo daughters experiences at school have really shocked me.
My son for example uses all this language 'sigma' 'alpha' etc... well he did until I explained to him that it was harmful macho nonsense. He's also asked me about andrew tate and trump etc as these people seem to be hero's for some of his male friends. These boys are 9!!
My son doesn't have unsupervised access to the Internet. And the access he does have is limited to one hour on his tablet in the living room on weekend days. During which he just plays roblox and Minecraft. We have disabled YouTube from the TV and he is not allowed YouTube on his tablet.. yet he still seems to come across endless misogynistic content at school somehow.
My son is a sweet boy imo and he forms his own opinions.. he was telling me how he disliked andrew tate for example, without me even having said anything
So it's not that I'm worried about him absorbing these ideas.. it's just a bit concerning that it's so prevalent!
I've also overheard some of his friends in the park sating horrific things about girls and women. Once I even heard one of them threatening to punch a girl. I did step in at this and told him it was disgusting and the boy did look faintly ashamed at least.
Has anyone else noticed this?
Also my 6yo has been subject to comments on her appearance by boys! Already at 6!
I'm sure it wasn't quite this bad wen I was at school or perhaps I just didn't notice?
My husband is a fair bit older than me and was also remarking that he never knew anything like this at school..
Altho obviously misogyny was alive and well when we were kids.. you just never really heard this so directly

OP posts:
username7891 · 07/11/2024 19:58

It's unmitigated access to the internet by neglectful parents. I've read reports on the rise of sexual assault in primary school and boys addicted to porn.

Australia has banned social media for under 16s and I think we should follow suit. Apparently it's to blame for the mental health crisis children are experiencing.

The manosphere has created a global backlash to women's rights. Incels have killed women and proponents of toxic masculinity such as Tate and Trump are hailed as heroes.
I think part of the problem is lack of decent male role models.

BananaSpanner · 07/11/2024 19:53

I have a year 8 boy. I haven’t heard him talk like this, nor his friends or him team mates in the sport he plays. Not saying they’re all perfect and I’m quite willing to believe they talk about inappropriate things when adults aren’t around but no, I’m not seeing widespread misogyny amongst my son’s peers. He also goes to a state school which I guess is pretty middle class.

Should have added, I didn’t see it when he was primary either.

Original poster
Thatcastlethere · 07/11/2024 19:49

Valhalla17 · 07/11/2024 19:46

I know what the OP is describing @Combattingthemoaners

I have a ds, he mentioned Tate to me once as he had heard about it from kids at school. We discussed it, he reflected for a few minutes and moved on. That was it. I understand the prevalence of these topics coming up but it's not boys to blame, it's social media and easy access to the world and warped views across a myriad of topics. Boys and girls are all impacted by this and their minds are being influenced by all sorts of things.

I'm just a bit fed up of the constant boy bashing on here to be frank.

Edited

I'm not bashing boys! I have a son.. who is lovely. I'm sure there are many lovely boys. I'm just alarmed that a lot of very young boys are having access to this stuff abd it seems quite a few are accepting it and internalising it.

OP posts:
Original poster
Thatcastlethere · 07/11/2024 19:47

Luddite26 · 07/11/2024 19:42

I was outraged that Rumpelstiltskin is still a story being sent home as part of the Oxford Reading Tree and everyone thought I was a raving loon.

I don't know that story.. what's the issue with it?

OP posts:
Valhalla17 · 07/11/2024 19:46

I know what the OP is describing @Combattingthemoaners

I have a ds, he mentioned Tate to me once as he had heard about it from kids at school. We discussed it, he reflected for a few minutes and moved on. That was it. I understand the prevalence of these topics coming up but it's not boys to blame, it's social media and easy access to the world and warped views across a myriad of topics. Boys and girls are all impacted by this and their minds are being influenced by all sorts of things.

I'm just a bit fed up of the constant boy bashing on here to be frank.

Luddite26 · 07/11/2024 19:42

I was outraged that Rumpelstiltskin is still a story being sent home as part of the Oxford Reading Tree and everyone thought I was a raving loon.

Combattingthemoaners · 07/11/2024 19:38

Valhalla17 · 07/11/2024 19:31

It's not just boys at all...

Children have changed and unfortunately social media is to blame. Your ds may not have access to this stuff, but plenty of other kids do...and not just in his year group.

Plenty of girls I've seen commenting on boys appearances and being generally unpleasant/aggressive.

Children have always been unkind to one another. What she is describing though is young boys attitudes towards girls and women being warped from a very young age. The idea that boys are “ultra” and “sigma” I.e. brave, breadwinners, strong, masculine, protectors, aggressive, dominant. Girls are there to be protected and to require men or boys. It’s very alarming for young boys to think like this and it is specific to boys the behaviour she is describing. It comes from online though.

fitzwilliamdarcy · 07/11/2024 19:37

There are concerns that gen z men are much more conservative than millennial men, and it wouldn’t surprise me if that trend continues to gen alpha. It’s supposedly also one of the reasons why Trump got re-elected - a big vote share in young men.

One of my friends teaches primary and she says that the way the boys talk is so sexual, despite them being so young, and the girls are targets of aggressive sexist bullying. She says it scares the life out of her for what the future will be like.

It doesn’t surprise me though. The rise of feminism was always going to produce a massive backlash from men, and boys get drawn into it early.

BCBird · 07/11/2024 19:37

The fact that children are given unsupervised access to the Internet is definitely evident. I teach in a secondary school snd have noticed that pupils in y7 have surreptitiously started making sexual noises in.lessons. This is very concerning. It would not have happened a few years ago

Valhalla17 · 07/11/2024 19:31

It's not just boys at all...

Children have changed and unfortunately social media is to blame. Your ds may not have access to this stuff, but plenty of other kids do...and not just in his year group.

Plenty of girls I've seen commenting on boys appearances and being generally unpleasant/aggressive.

Combattingthemoaners · 07/11/2024 19:29

Schools are just micro climates of wider society and this is definitely a wider societal issue. Lots of children are being allowed unsupervised access to the internet and are also parroting what their older siblings are saying. Toxic masculinity is on the rise and it is everyone’s job to call it out for what it is.