Should I include her in my will?

OP owns house outright this is protected.

DH owned house, rented it to the his DD (was this at market rate or below?), DD laid claim to the house in the event of her father’s death. House fell into disrepair and rather than maintain DH cut his losses and sold.

DH put some (or all) of the proceeds into the business he and OP own jointly.

Business owned 50/50 and presuming both are taking equal amounts (OP has input similar investment by not taking salary over a number of years)
Scenario

DH dies, assuming a directors agreement in place this goes to OP.

Now, OP could get the business valued at this point and then offer DSD 25% of the worth (or 50%) if feeling particularly generous.
However, what DSD has not taken into account is that NONE OF THIS IS HER MONEY

Now may be the time for your DH to set up an ISA or similar for his DD to go to her on his passing. Then this is clearly stipulated.

Agree, and then the sc can sense that, and it's on her radar, then gets labeled greedy. It's lonely being an only child with a bunch of full ss's who stand to inherit better than you. Op's own kids would likely feel similar if they were in her position.

Surely your husband's half if the business should go to his daughter and your half should go to your children? If the house is yours you can leave that to your children.

I think her dad has been remiss and not looked out sufficiently for his own child. It's often the case that when a man remarries, he seems to forget his children, whilst the new wife looks out for hers.

That said you don't owe her anything. It's her father's job to have sorted something for her or request she have 50% (or whatever percentage he initially put with perhaps some interest) of the business. It's quite disgraceful that he didn't do this immediately.

Split equally, no. But a share, yes.

You need to do what suits you and what you think of your children (and grandchildren (to be)). My Mum altered her will and left everything to her grandchildren - partly because they needed it, and, we suspect, partly because I have more children than my sister and brother who never came anywhere near and left all the caring (ten years of daily visits) to me, even though they had less responsibilities and more time than me.
Brother has been vile since. TBH I don't care - he has shown his true colours and he is not a nice person. He threatened to challenge the will, but didn't have a leg to stand on. He took things from the house, etc. etc. and is effectively stealing from his own children (and mephews and nieces).
NO ONE has any right to expect money - your money, do what YOU want.

I do hope you mean all this.

Putting her attitude aside for the moment, from your original posts I immediately felt like she was being short changed, but only because your DH has not future proofed his assets, and has instead liquidated them to put into a business with you that she would never own half of, he has basically taken it off her and given to you to then pass on to your children and cut her out completely.

I am in the same situation as him, moved in with DH and even down to putting money to start a business but I would never in a million years sell off an asset like that, I raised the finance a different way to ensure it remained for our daughters future as a long term investment, you've managed to keep your house and still put into the business so not sure why he couldn't do that to be honest, I could be wrong but I would hazard a guess that he is paying half the bills etc at your house, while taking on the full financial burden of his own? If that's the case then you are part of the reason he has been forced to sell up, from the outside it sounds a bit like "what's mine is mine and what's yours is mine now too.. and your daughter can do one because she doesn't work hard enough"

Her attitude towards it seems to stink, but if it is a long line of him choosing to prioritise you and your children (not just financially) while disregarding her and her children I can understand why some resentment may have built up.

A bit of understanding and tolerance all round would probably not go amiss.

You need to ask the question that of DH still had his house would your step daughter have been happy splitting her inheritance from it with your children?

Because that’s what she’s asking you to do with yours.

I agree with this. It's the fairest way to do it.

Don’t do it. DH and I have children from previous relationships and due to this, we have a trust will. My 50% goes to my child, his 50% goes to his two children. I’m considering a small cash gift in my will to DSS but it wouldn’t be more than £2k. Nothing to DSD as she’s nasty to me 🤷‍♀️ It’s always complicated when step-kids become involved.

You should include exactly who you want in your will. The cats home? Yep. The local crack head? Still yep though would not be most people's choice.
It's your business and you don't need to share it with anyone. Until your dead.
Nobody is owed money off anyone in inheritance. My dad left me nothing, but my mum will leave me whatever she has. I'd rather she had a good long life and spent it on herself tbh.
So you do what you think is right.

Obviously they are with someone else. He has one child.

Why should she? OP’s DH doesn’t want her to have that. He could give it to her himself if he did.

This feels like it will screw your own children - how much is the business and house worth?

I think she should get DH’s assets - I.e. whatever % of the business is DH’s (or if you sell the business before death what money DH has left from that). Your kids get your house and your % of the business (or money from any sales).

When both of you die she should have 50% of the business or the value dh put into the business if that is more.

It may just be me, but I 💯 believe that it is the responsibility of the parent (in this case her father), to ensure t(if that’s their wish), that their mundane affairs such as inheritances are sorted.

if he invested in your home or business, he should have made it clear in a law abiding contract that she would inherit something. If he didn’t care that much, then that’s that.

If OP and her DH own and run a business it might be really important what they bring as people. It is nit just customers, equipment clients etc.
A business can dwindle if a partner dies, sadly.
I think this DSS has had an idea of her inheritance and still expects it.
OP already has a house and that’s a solid asset to pass to her DC.
If DSS sees her dad and his wife seemingly enjoying the good life she might feel she is entitled to a piece of that.
Get a will and make it solid. It can always be changed later on no matter what the circumstances are.
I have family friends with a sizeable property to be divided between three DC. After dad died, mum has gone into private care and the house has been sold to pay for it.

She's money grabbing and a very, very, by cheeky sod.

Tell her to take a long walk off a short pier.

This is a lovely kind update, but do consider changing variables, could your children grow up & want to be part of the business? They’d then lose it after your death? Would DSD/partner be prepared to work in the business to help it grow so they could run it upon inheriting it? They don’t have to do it FT to start. (They only work PT so have plenty time so have a side hustle) This would mean you & DH can take long lunches & wind down a bit without the business declining. Your DH can leave things in trust (as can you) for in the event of him passing first. My DF passed several years ago & left his half of the house equally between his children. However, we can’t sell it, or have any right over it until DM passes, it was written into trust so she has control of it & use of it until she passes. (Her half is also left to same children). She doesn’t pay rent & we aren’t liable for any bills. In the event she has to go into care, only her half can be used towards care fees.

Obviously you can change a will at any time, but do think through a few “what if’s” first.

Lazy and entitled? Not a great combination. You owe her nothing. Your DP can leave her what he wants.

No I think he needs to make plans for her not you. I say that as a single parent who intends to provide for my own children. I wouldn’t expect a partner to do this.

It’s not and never has been her money, or something she’s entitled to have. Her father chose what he wanted to do with his assets and money. He chose to invest in OP’s business, and he’s chosen to leave his stake to OP. He could have done what OP did, but chose not to. It isn’t on OP to do it for him.

@Rhaidimiddim the way I am reading is that if one partner is still alive the business is transferred to them, and the OP's questions relates to when she is the surviving partner (which is the most likely scenario as husband is older by some years). I'm assuming if DH is the surviving spouse he will leave something to his DSD then

The money from her Dad's house that would otherwise have been her's, has been consumed to provide income for you and your husband, who jointly threw your lot in together... but his capital has been consumed and yours has remained intact.. ergo.. your children's inheritance has been protected and her's has been spent.

The promise of passing the business to her seems disingenuous on the face of it.. it is a business that relies on you and your husband to keep it running and has little value otherwise... you have reduced your input to the business, and your husband is winding down.. which if this continues, there will be little left if you both spend a number of years in retirement.. and if it relies on you and your husband, there is no guarantee that your DSD will be interested or capable of running this business.

Passing money to grandkids ie missing ger out completely seems unkind... why do you value her children more than her?

Why does your DH not wish to secure her future when on the face of it.. had he not moved in with you.. he would still have his house... care fees not withstanding.

I understand that you wish to pass your house on to your children and obviously I don't know how much of this house you paid for compared to how much you have each contributed to your living costs and the business... and I am sure that is relevant... but if your income for several years and maybe some of your retirement funds were generated from your DH's capital, I think you should both consider how to include your DSD in your inheritance planning, no matter what you think of the age she had children or how much she and her husband earn.