Play date in XL Bully house

I’d be very clear that it’s the dog that’s the reason. XL bully owners need to understand what other people think of their choice of ‘pet’.

I’d be polite but clear - and emphasise that her DC is welcome at yours.

Don’t worry about ‘pissing her off’ Your sons safety comes first.

I would be honest and simply say I’m not comfortable with my child being around that breed of dog. Could you invite that child to your home instead?

Suggest a play date at a park.
And be honest and have a chat with her.

No no no.
We have 3 dogs and I always tell people what breed they are. We don't host many play dates. These are small/medium breeds never been a problem but one barks and I appreciate that some people find that scary. I would not let my DD go to a play date with large dogs of guarding or bully breeds, and an XL bully would be a hands down no way.

I don’t understand why she would want to take the risk. If I had a dog like that I would provide you with reassurance by saying I would keep the dog separate. I think this is part of the problem with these breeds that the owners just assume their dog is lovely n stead of managing risk in a sensible way

Not a chance in hell.

I’d prioritise my child’s safety over offending people any day of the week. Tbh I would be questioning her judgement to have one of those dogs around her own kids.

Did you not see the paper the other day????

Say no, because of the dog

I wouldn't be going as an adult let alone send a child.

You can trust a person to be in control of a car. You can’t trust a person to be in control of an XL Bully - they cannot be controlled.

OP - good choice in avoiding at all costs. Be truthful though or you’ll keep getting invites. Maybe suggest play date at yours instead.

May I be the 94th person to say this is what to tell her?

This is the point isn’t it? It’s not necessarily about the dogs breed (although I think OP would be mad to led her child go) - if you’re not happy with your child being in a house with strange dogs, then don’t let them go. Responsible dog owners will understand and have no issues and if the woman IS angry about it, then OP was even more correct in her decision.

Like you, I just couldn't allow this.

I'd also be truthful about the reason because she'll ask for play dates again in the future if you're not.

No and I'd say why. I would never take the risk, that dog could turn and you'd never forgive yourself.

I have a cockapoo and someone said their dc was scared and didn’t come around. I was not offended.
Never in a million years would I let my dc go anywhere near a xlbully. They don’t discriminate who they maul, adults and children.

They are all 'lovely dogs' apparently. It is familiar with the 3 kids but yours is a stranger spelling danger.

You are the responsible adult and its an easy decision

Nope no way would I let my child go. Xl bully owners have blinkers on and come out with the mantra it's the owner not the dog. They are not expecting their dog to turn as big softys etc. I was told by one small dogs are just as bad but no one has a problem with them. I have a yorkie she is an asshole with small dog syndrome difference is I can scoop her up with one hand and stop her. Still wouldn't leave her unattended with a child. No dog is to be trusted.

Massive dog lover here. Rescued many in my life. Answer would be no and I would be honest as to why. Tell her you heard the news about the “loving” XL Bully who killed the ten year old girl in Malton last Friday and feel too anxious to let your child go round. Be honest. It’s ok.

Ridiculous that she asked you in the first place. What parent would possibly say yes?!

One of my children’s friends parents doesn’t let her have play dates at my house as I have dogs (currently a 16 year old spaniel, a 10 year old spaniel and a 2 year old golden retriever).

TBH I found the parents very sensible when they explained they weren’t’ comfortable with it. Dogs would have been in the garden/kitchen and kids in the playroom - but that’s not the point. The parents weren’t happy and that’s their choice. Sadly, I doubt OP will get the same response but it is 100% the right choice.

No, I wouldn’t, no way. I am a big animal lover but these friendly family pets do attack. One of the poor children killed by an XL bully was on a play date. I’d just be honest, surely she’s going to have many people decline for the same. Offer to host at your house instead.

No way.

I would just be honest, you don’t want your child around a banned breed.

I wouldn’t feel at all embarrassed about saying it either .

I voted YABU, but only because I can’t even believe you’d even consider this. No way. Never.

She doesn’t need to agonise over what to say. No is enough.

She was asking for advice on what to tell the parent.