Or is my husband - doesn't want sex unless stop cosleeping with DC

Whats more important sex or sleep?

SLEEP!!!

And also I wouldn’t want sex with a man that refuses to have sex with me unless it’s in a bed!

If you read my post I stated that others did not have this problem, only that I did. Never did i say anyone else had my same exp or problems with it. I hated it. But it's lovely yiu didnt.

So your dh wants you to get broken sleep and be exhausted so that he doesn't have to go to a spare room for sex?
And in order to get his own way he's with holding sex?

I'd say if he wants your child to sleep in their own room it needs to be shared responsibility. So either he alternates every other night or you do half the night each.

But in the 1950s mum's did not "co-sleep" with their parents. Maybe some same bed sharing with siblings due to top and tail?

Op sorry you’ve gotten such narrow minded responses - join one of the cosleeping Facebook groups and you will find lots of us in the Western world who are not obsessed with separating from our children as young as possible!

My partner and I happily cosleep with our 4yo - she goes to bed at 7pm and we have the entire evening to have sex in any other room of the house. It was one of my non negotiables discussed before having our daughter.

Appreciate he is allowed to dislike cosleeping equally as you are allowed to like it and don’t have any suggestions re the disagreement but please don’t let his withholding sex or the opinions on here make you stop cosleeping before you are ready. Sad to see archaic approaches to parenting still being pushed on anyone who dares to do it differently

You are, hands down, the unreasonable one.

This! Our kids used to start in their own beds and come in with us in the middle of the night. Then you have best of both worlds!

Oh look, women helping women again.

THEIR child.

What an awful thread.

According to the majority of comments It’s all the OPs problem to sort the child out so her husband can get his sex that he apparently deserves or it won’t be a marriage anymore.

Co-sleeping is quite normal, not sure why so many are so against it with young children. Everyone has to respond to their children in different ways and shouldn’t be judged.

Anyway, he needs to assist you in finding a way to settle your child in their room if that’s what is needed for your own relationship. But the fact you’ve mentioned it’s the only way you get sleep makes me think there’s a deeper issue with you taking the most childcare responsibilities with him doing little. To then expect sex after this is a Mickey take. He needs to pull his weight and assist you with this, it’s not your problem to solve. It requires both parents and team work.

Personally I’d be sleeping with the child in their room if I was that sleep deprived and sleep was a big issue. I couldn’t take the pawing at me for sex when I go to bed - but that’s just me.

🤭 I'm still sharing a bed my 5.5 year old, but im single and very sexless so its alright 😅

But a little weird

YABU a 3 year old needs to sleep in their own bed

YABVU.

No yare not unreasonable.( I barely function with sleep) If Dh doesn't like/comfy with co sleep?he Fifty percent parent= find workable solution.
With hold sex? ...
Yuk
Awful confident think Is "deny" you

Of course he does.

However - I’m sure most would agree that daytimes are chaotic, so we’d actually like some time back to be a couple.

We’d like to not be needed 24/7, 2am actually isn’t anyone’s favourite time to be called upon.

We’d like him to have some independence and healthier attachments that aren’t as intense.

Also - tired. We both get up and down all night to try resettling, repeatedly.

All children have needs, whether they’re SEN or not - but they’re not the only people in the house with them.

put a double bed 🛌 in son’s room if he wakes u go sleep in there no need to be back and forth

You want sex, but in theory you could easily live without it?

Which is it?

I am with your husband here. YABU.

Rubbish!

I co-slept for varying times with all three of our children. We have been married for 34 years and have been together for 39 years, soon to be 40 early next year. He's far from perfect, god knows, but he put our children first, and so did I!

Well your SEN 8 year old surely takes priority over your horny husband?

My H is so far from being an 'enlightened' husband but even he was happy for me to co-sleep with our children long-term and our sex life was fine! There are compromises to be made. I don't think either of us would change a thing.

And I wouldn’t dream of having sex with her in the bed!!

if it helps, dh moves our 2yo in with her 6yo brother for us to have the bed for sex. It never worked well when we moved her to her bed, but tuck her up with her brother and she’s good for a few hours

You are totally unreasonable. This co-sleeping nonsense must surely be the death knell to any relationship.
Your child is three years old. Time for their own bed/room.

That’s fair enough but we’ve currently got a (SEN) 8 year old who won’t sleep longer than 2hrs independently, and last week’s attempts at changing that provided 4hrs of sleep in 48hrs.

He very much is looking back, and there are lots of regrets.

I’m sure it does work for some people, but if OP’s husband is one of those it doesn’t work for, I don’t see why he automatically has to be wrong.

But the OP doesn't want to sleep train. She loves co-sleeping with her child.

Absolutely, I can agree there.

Maybe because it sounds like it's an issue OP started? It doesn't sound like he ever wanted it and 6 months later, he is still unhappy and probably feeling resentful it ever started in the first place.

Despite that, it is something that they need to manage together.