Ruined the wedding dress i was going to send back

I think the disaster dress is beautiful from the back and you do spend a lot of time with your back to the congregation as a bride( now trying to imagine how mine looked from behind😕🤔

I was thinking that. And, without wanting to sound like I’m making the sort of comment a flippant brother would make, would losing a bit of weight help it to fit? It sounds as though you quite liked it but for the fit?

I don’t like either. I wouldn’t send more money trying to fix disaster. Just keep looking for something that fits.

I'm not 100% sure where you are after being given a gift voucher and some consultations with seamstresses but if that's the disaster dress and it's still in the running, I think it's a lovely style on you, more so than the rogue dress (I prefer the back, and the cleaner lines also bust shape is more flattering). It looks a good fit in the photo so presumably isn't too far off in real life. It'll all work out fine!

https://blog.boldmetrics.com/do-you-know-what-happens-to-clothes-after-you-return-them?hs_amp=true

Vanity sizing also seems to be even bigger now, it's increasing all the time.
My size hasn't changed but I'm having to return stuff as it swamps me.

This.
Having worked for many fashion retail brands, when refunds are high online you look at your size guide resources. A lot of ££ is spent helping customers find the right size. Crap brands where sizing is all over the place force customers to order multiple sizes and styles.

The clothes are most definitely resold.
The problem for the retailer is when the customer keeps the clothes right up to the maximum time before returning.

That's dead stock and dead stock means no cash flow, then they can't pay suppliers. Also, as stock comes from the Far East, when its in people's homes, the retailer won't know how many of which size to replace.

I don't know why people don't send it back promptly. Mine arrives, I try it on and either keep or send back that day or next.

30 days is too long as well I think.

What difference does that make to whether it can be dry cleaned?

She’s already explained this. She’s at the back of beyond

I prefer the disaster dress but I would say neither.

If it were me I would probably look back at the photos in years to come and think of the stain incident when I looked at it!

I’d try to sell it personally. Unless you really loved it aside from it being too small (as mentioned in the OP), and would have got the next size up.

It won’t be attached with a safety pin.

A tag wouldn't stop it from being dry cleaned, would it?

That said, a friend of mine once bought a light coloured silk dress from Coast and it had one of those tags attached with a safety pin. Someone spilt a glass of red wine on it at a party, she had it dry cleaned, it came up good as new and she put the tag back on and returned it.

we shouldn’t. Because very few of the returned items are resold- they mostly are disposed of. It’s crazy. But it is widely known to be happening so if you are at all mindful of the environmental impact of this you should avoid buying with the intention of returning.

I wasn't cheeky or more accurately sensible when ordering bargain price pyjamas last week.
I ordered four pairs of one size, which were massive. Had I also ordered down in size as well, they wouldn't have sold out of them to replace and I wouldn't still be driving around looking to match up others. They have also since doubled in price!

I think the neckline on the 2nd dress is much more flattering.

I much prefer it overall.

Do you have a pic of dress A, minus the lace, and how big is the stain,?

If no stain on A, which dress would you prefer?

That lace is far too heavy for the dress, but I need to see the stain for the idea I have. Think you need to disguise the stain to sell?

https://www.coastfashion.com/product/coast-cowl-back-fishtail-wedding-dress-with-puddle_bcc09577?colour=ecru

What a nightmare. So sorry this is happening to you.

I think rogue dress is more flattering and doesn't look too big at all. Disaster dress looks nice too. Can you just cover the stains with a bit of beading or passementarie (sp?) rather than have that "breastplate" effect of the large pieces of lace? Or even a brooch of some sort?

Sorry, I don't think either of those is quite right.
Send back rogue dress, sell on disaster dress.
Tell us your size and budget and let us help you find something stunning.

I’d go for disaster dress with the lace.

The disaster dress is actually lovely and I don't think would cost much to attach the beading properly (I think I could even do this myself and am not a great seamstress). I would say get some really good - and if necessary slightly small - spanx or very good underwear. It made a huge difference to my dress (which was vintage and tiny - I could only just get it on).

I do too. It doesnt always mean clothes look right so they do get returned. The real thing doesn't always look as in a photo or on the model.

Even if sizing was consistently correct it doesnt mean all outfits would look right. So it makes sense to try before you buy.

Not really the same, you're keeping multiple sizes (when you know you don't need all of them) for days not just putting them straight back. If everyone does it then no wonder most sizes say "low stock" or "sold out" when I actually try to buy just the one size I need.