Ruined the wedding dress i was going to send back

As a splurge recently following weight loss, I ordered a very expensive cashmere cardigan online from a high street retailer. I was here when Evri delivered, and when I opened the parcel I realised that it had not only been worn (stank of perfume) but it had a large hole on the back/neck seam! I was absolutely fuming, and rang them immediately - but ended up having to keep the item as they wouldn't accept it was delivered like it. I was furious having to sew it up and wash it before I could wear it.

I will never order anything of value online again.

Second this.

You could try dabbing at the stain with a cotton pad soaked in surgical spirit/rubbing alcohol. It evaporates really quickly. Try it on an old tshirt or something first.

If you had no makeup on then it seems unlikely it came from you, how could it have? Perhaps it didn’t show in the pic due to the flash ? I had trousers from JL recently that I wore, put my hand in the pocket, and found a receipt for a restaurant! So someone had worn them and then returned them . I didn’t bother returning them as I had already worn then but it wasn’t great, surely they should check garments properly before sending them out again.
wedding dress sizing isn’t the same as regular sizing, they are smaller, so if you are a ten you will need at least a 12, ask JL for sizing advice.

How is it any different from going into the physical shop and trying on multiple dresses in the changing rooms?

I feel for you OP, what a quick expensive mistake.

i really wouldn’t bother going back to JL as they can’t do anything - they can’t accept it back into stock and they don’t have insurance for this sort of thing.(insurance for fire or floods etc in their shops). I used to work for them. It would be a wasted trip on your part.

im really glad you have the honesty not to try to return it and lie. To the other PP who said do it because JL can afford it, no they can’t they are on their knees. Have you read the news about closing stores and huge falling profits. They are not doing well in any shape or form (Waitrose sometimes is)

Great. What if the colour is different irl or it just looks shit on? Or does everything suit you, you lucky thing?

Why was it cheeky? She maybe wanted a choice of dress and to try them on in the comfort of her own home.

No, most people make an appointment and try them on

You ruined it, its yours that's the long and short of it.

I got rid of Amex as it seemed like more and more UK stores wouldn't accept it...I wonder if that is why...

A lot of effort will have gone into making it
That's really dishonest and not a good omen for the wedding

How much do you think they buy in a £500 wedding dress? £80 tops - if they take it back they’ll sell it for more in the sale!

I do feel for you OP - a local seamstress will give you a decent quote - ring a few or ask for a recommendation.

DDs prom dress was shortened and made wider and the waist and she didn’t charge.

DD2 had her altered and cost £15 for cups and shortened at a different shop.

Ask around- you may get this up graded and be a unique dress.

let’s see !!

Why cheeky? I would order various items to try on before deciding which I want to keep. Why is a wedding dress any different?

How is it cheeky? How can you tell from a picture how something is going to look on you in real life?
I have ordered dresses I thought would suit me but didn't, are you saying I should just keep them?
They were from online retailers with perhaps one 'flagship' store in London and maybe another in Manchester: not a local shop where they may be in stock. But even so: most shops eg M&S have a much broader range of stock online than in store, and have 'online only' items, so what is your suggestion for these items? Or do you think if anything has been tried on it must be bought? Do you buy everything you try on in a shop?
Ridiculous, absolutely ridiculous.

I can’t work out why you think that JL or your credit card insurance are going to refund in this situation.
You bought a dress. You got a stain on the dress. That’s on you.
It’s rubbish but when trying on potential wedding dresses you should have been extra careful.

When I bought my wedding dress, I was warned against buying anything too small as it is incredibly difficult to take a dress out. They advise buying bigger and altering it to fit. (Just wanted to add this as I saw someone above saying that they make wedding dresses easy to take out)

Saying that, adding a corset back may help to make the bodice fit better.

For reference, my wedding dress alterations were just over £300.

Amex will refund the cost of the item if it gets damaged within 90 days of purchase so would very possibly refund for something like this.

What is that? Because the only thing I can think of (and that Google is coming up with) is Vagisil!

You could try your home insurance.

Credit card insurance is only if it is not received how you got it and the vendor has refused a refund.
You have to show them you have tried to get a refund and how the item was faulty/not what you were expecting. So you would have to lie to them / JL.

This might sound really weird. But I use a tape measure and use the size charts on whatever site I'm using before ordering.

If you find a credit card that will insure you and pay out for you mucking up an expensive item in your home please do let us know.

They won't have any insurance but you may be covered under our contents insurance.

Mind, the excess may be such that it's not worth claiming.

This is exactly the sort of thing I would do so I sympathise! If I am in possession of something that absolutely MUST NOT be damaged in anyway, I will damage it!

I agree that making the back a laced bodice wont cost the earth, and will be a LOT less than letting it out on the seams. Wedding dresses are notorious for coming up small, this is a common alteration (have a friend who had to do this and her seamstress said that it was the most common job she got, usually with a couple of weeks of the wedding due to weight gain/loss).

As for the stain, if its not silk then you will be able to machine wash it on a delicate cycle or handwash if you feel that you would prefer that. You can get some really nice applique bead designs that are easy to add to a dress, individual beading would take hours and cost a fortune.

Can you post a picture of the dress on the JL website and a pic of the stain?

Oh no OP, this is guttering! But this is why bridal shops and changing rooms are super clean when trying them on, I don't think I would be trying multiple dresses on at my home because of this.
FWIW I had an occasion dress I was going to take back left it on the side and DC spilt a drink over it 😩 was also stuck with it, cleaned up ok but because I didn't want it, then HAD to keep it I never wore it and sold it for next to nothing. Unfortunately these things happen ☹️

I worked in a bridal shop many years ago and we would of removed stains with vagisel, and then steamed to dry so no watermarks

I don't think it's any more cheeky to order multiple dresses at a time and return unwanted ones. How else are you supposed to find out what size/style works for you? how is it any different from taking multiple sizes/styles into the changing room to try on?

As PP have said, a lot of the problem is erratic sizing. In the last year I've bought clothes in size 8 that fit perfectly and in other clothes I've had to buy a size 12 to get the best fit. One particular independent brand I really like I normally have to buy an 8 in dresses, a 10 in dresses and a 12 in tops. Craziness.