To ask my DP for some money??

LTB quickly. Freeloader.

If you were married, with that level of commitment to each other, it would be ok-- but you're not. Don't be the woman who bankrolls him through lean times. For some reason they usually find someone else to share the fat times with.

You are in the right, you have been carrying him, it's now his turn to pay up, half is the least you deserve even more if he can spare it. I think a chat us needed about the future.

Seek a new, third, flat mate A.S.A.P.
Your living situation obviously needed the extra person to live comfortably.

Keep accurate tabs on what your partner owes - his one third of costs at least.
Did the other flat mate pay a month of rent in advance when they left?

Assume that he will repay you as possible.

Sorry, but I don't trust him. He's been owed money for over paying credit cards so he's pretty careful with money. I'd suggest he has money and he's just not sharing. See how the next few months go once he's working and if he's still reluctant I'd suggest finding someone else. Also, I'd suggest you explain to him how hard it's been financially for you and ask, as soon as he's paid to reimburse you financially too. He needs to grow up if he thinks he's going to be living off you.

I use to have a friend who always pleaded poverty, couldn't pay for meals so we'd sub her. It got boring, we suggested she didn't come for meals and to wait. It turned out being down to her last £500 each month was what she called being skint. If she could freeload she would!

Cocklodger! Get rid.

good luck OP. You can do so much better.

You shouldn't have to ask. This would really put me off someone who is meant to be a partner.

It's not 'can I have some' it's 'great that can go towards the £4K that you owe me in rent'

He does pay his way. Stop making stuff up.

He sounds a decent bloke wrt money, cleaning etc usually. Hopefully now he has the temp work it’ll only be a few more days till things are back to nromal.

That said, if I were in his position and my partner used the money that was my lifeline (even if I accepted that I owed it) to go out drinking with someone else, I’d be hurt and probably angry. @OrchardBlack if he is due a pay check next week, can’t you go out then instead, and this weekend stay in with him and a bottle of wine? In solidarity at his situation. Otherwise I’d wonder why you HAD to have the money back straightaway, when if you could have waited I could have bought fuel and maybe paid my phone bill, but now I can only do one of those…

I think some of these replies have been a bit unfair on him, given the extra info OP has provided. (Spent his money on food shops, B&Q to do lots of DIY in the house, cleans, cooks etc.) He is literally just trying to get through the next couple weeks before he goes back to bringing in regular money again.

He should have offered some, yes. But I agree he was probably just relieved he could now get to his first pay next week (petrol, food) and not have to ask for more help.

Did he know how badly you were struggling because you helped him? It just sounds like a lack of communication. You both should have (need to do it now) sit down and work all this financial stuff out. Be open and honest with each other so you both know whats expected and needs to happen going forwards.

I agree

I agree with this. I have spent the majority of my life with no savings , not because of carelessness but more to do with single income and parenthood etc

I can see why you feel uncomfortable about having to ask OP. Did he know how scarce your finances were ? I am not making excuses for him but if he has previously paid his way and wasn't clear on the dire straits of your present finances, then maybe he just didn't think.
You had every right to ask him and must not allow yourself to be uncomfortable re this

How do you mean, no one does this? Been with my partner 10 years, we have both had periods of unemployment, we pay our share from our savings. We don't expect to be bank rolled by eAach other. Hopefully I misunderstood you.

He doesn't get to live with you rent free. He go halves on everything or moves out.

Things have changed for a lot of people the last 5 years... People who could once save on their wage are now living month to month.

It only takes one event to clear prior savings and then it is very, very difficult to build them back up now.

I think it’s a bit unwise considering they are ‘on the bones of their arse’.

I think YABU to think about using the money to go drinking!

Not unreasonable at all , when in similar situation I kept track of spending and made sure I was refunded for the period where he had no cash flow once he was back at work

Did you have a conversation about how you’d both manage the bills
1- while he had no income
2- now that the lodger has moved out

Whose name is in the tenancy agreement, therefore who’s to make up the shortfall the lodger paid?

Now might be a good time to have a conversation about the bills going forward. Might be awkward now, but better that you’re both clear and agree going forward. You don’t want to feel uncomfortable again and find you both have different expectations of his pay when he received it next Friday.

You need to broach it with him now or he’ll end up being a cocklodger. He needs to pay for things, does he not even buy any food in?