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To remove DS from nursery always sick?

40 replies

Findingmyselfagainn · 06/11/2024 09:42

Since DS started nursery in September he’s a completely different child. He’s always sick every week he is picking something up. We now have bronchitis. When I drop him off the kids there are full of cold and noses running.

MIL has now offered to have him as I keep having time off from work and I can’t do it anymore.

DS keeps bringing it home and then we are all sick I just can’t do it anymore. Making our lives so miserable.

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jolota · 06/11/2024 16:16

The first winter is the worst and honestly I'm of the opinion that they will catch it all anyway unless you never socialise them with kids at all. If its not now it will be when they start school if they haven't had their immune system put through the ringer before then!
It's really not fun though so I understand your frustration. I'd probably see if it persists after the winter & ask if they're increasing their cleaning regime in line with the increase in illnesses - our nursery always tells us when there's stuff going round and how they're attempting to combat it though it all feels kind of inevitable because they're 2 year olds.

Skybluepinky · 06/11/2024 16:04

Large childcare settings are germ factories, as children can’t follow good hygiene and pick their noses put things in their mouths etc, it’s the time b4 school where they build their immune system.

Olika · 06/11/2024 15:50

@Findingmyselfagainn I took my DD off as I wasn't able to work as she was constantly sick. She has been with DGPs for over a year now and only sick random here and there. I would take up your MIL's offer and try again when he is older.

middleagedandinarage · 06/11/2024 15:20

Nettleskeins · 06/11/2024 10:30

Why are people saying it's worth sticking it out? On what evidence? It's no less anecdotal than my own, anecdotal experience of no nursery leading to my child's improved health.

Because I honestly think when they first go to a setting like this they have a period where they pick up lot's of bugs until they build up immunity. IMO it's better getting it out the way now than at school etc

Craftymam · 06/11/2024 14:39

The first two months we were lucky if they we got in once a week 😂

Use MIL if she's a willing carer. And go to work as usual.

After the first few months it will settle down and they are less ill. After a year hardly ever. It's a pain but it's just a process you have to go through. And it does end.

BatFaceGiirll · 06/11/2024 14:24

It's all well and good people urging you to 'stick it out' but bronchitis is categorically not a usual thing to pick up at nursery and at this rate, you'll be lucky to have a job to go to

I'd be taking up your mother in law on her kind offer - at the very least it gives your little one a chance to recover between all these illnesses

Abracadabra12345 · 06/11/2024 13:09

Nettleskeins · 06/11/2024 10:30

Why are people saying it's worth sticking it out? On what evidence? It's no less anecdotal than my own, anecdotal experience of no nursery leading to my child's improved health.

This is how I feel. Put a load of little ones together all day in a heated, closed environment and of course they'll catch everything going, and at a small and vulnerable stage. I'd far rather they were bigger and more robust ie older.

I agree with lots of fresh air and less prolonged close, indoor contact with other littlies

AttachmentFTW · 06/11/2024 11:55

There are some particularly nasty bugs going round at the moment. Also, him starting nursery in September coincided with all the kids returning to school so if any of his nursery friends have older brothers and sisters he was exposed to all those new germs as well. This might be why it was worse than with your other two if they started nursery at different times of the year. Although agree with other posters starting nursery at anytime will bring on many illnesses and taking him out now will only delay the inevitable.

Plastictrees · 06/11/2024 11:51

My DC started nursery in September too, only one short day a week… and it has been constant illness as you say. We had hand, foot and mouth 3 weeks ago and now it’s tonsillitis. It is so disruptive and frustrating, I am dreading when DC is in nursery more! I think it is largely par for the course and should hopefully get better, I don’t think it helps starting in the autumn/winter either. Sending solidarity!

willowpatternchina · 06/11/2024 11:32

Check for underlying causes.
Are his diet and sleep good, and does he get plenty of fresh air? If the nursery keeps them inside all the time as soon as the weather turns cooler that really won't be helping.
How old is he and how long are his nursery hours - how does he seem energy-wise? Some young children can't manage very long hours as it wears them out, and that will obviously have a knock-on effect on their immune system. If MIL is offering to help, could you experiment with her regularly picking him up early from nursery and taking him home for some very quiet, restful time at home and see if that seems to make any difference?

Hankunamatata · 06/11/2024 11:23

Joys of daycare.

Tagyoureit · 06/11/2024 11:22

Happens to everyone.

When DS started nursery, i thought I was going to lose my job as he was ill, I was ill, then we were both ill, then better for a week or 2 and it all started again.

It got better eventually, I did go through a phase of spraying dettol over door handles, remotes, bannisters, taps etc every night before bed. It was tedious but I do think it helped.

It will get better 💐

mickandrorty · 06/11/2024 11:12

I think some kids are just more prone to catching things! I have 3 in primary and 1 has 99% attendance the other 96% and the middle one was down to nearly 80% at one point last year!

InTheRainOnATrain · 06/11/2024 10:38

How old is he? Sorry if I’ve missed it. But if he’s under 2 and MIL is actually reliable and suitable to give you the childcare you need then hands down do that since there’s no benefit for babies being in nursery other than the childcare so you can work, so if you can still get that without the illnesses then it will better for everyone. However, if he’s older and it’s preschool/school nursery then I think the socialisation and prep for school makes it worth it and better getting everything now than when he starts reception.

Nettleskeins · 06/11/2024 10:37

This was in 2003 so that's interesting.
I do think fresh air is incredibly important though and underestimated in children's health.

StudioFocusTricky · 06/11/2024 10:32

Nettleskeins · 06/11/2024 10:28

Ds2 was diagnosed with "asthma" by a NHS paediatrician at 11 months. I was a SAHM at the time, no nursery. By 15 months there was no evidence of it. Nor to this day. Pre school at 2.5 years three hours a day until school.

I'm not sure what you would conclude from that but I think constant fresh air and exercise did help him "grow out of it" whereas a "closed" nursery environment might have exacerbated it..who knows.

Asthma isn't diagnosed before age 2 any more because growing out of it is very common.

MollyButton · 06/11/2024 10:31

Generally they do pick up everything.

But if you think it is excessive then I would visit your GP. It could be (especially as it's not your first child) that there is an underlying cause.

Caiti19 · 06/11/2024 10:30

Oh and I agree with previous person who mentioned Vitamin D. You can get a spray for the mouth that's easier than a tablet.

Nettleskeins · 06/11/2024 10:30

Why are people saying it's worth sticking it out? On what evidence? It's no less anecdotal than my own, anecdotal experience of no nursery leading to my child's improved health.

Nettleskeins · 06/11/2024 10:28

Ds2 was diagnosed with "asthma" by a NHS paediatrician at 11 months. I was a SAHM at the time, no nursery. By 15 months there was no evidence of it. Nor to this day. Pre school at 2.5 years three hours a day until school.

I'm not sure what you would conclude from that but I think constant fresh air and exercise did help him "grow out of it" whereas a "closed" nursery environment might have exacerbated it..who knows.

Caiti19 · 06/11/2024 10:28

Not sure I agree with those saying you're just delaying it. How old is the child? There's a big difference between a child having back-to-back illnesses for a year at age 2 or 3, and having more widely-spaced illnesses between the ages of 2 and 6 for example. The former can really takes its toll on a child. If you have the option of MIL taking car of him, I'd have him with her most days and in nursery 1 or 2 days a week if that's possible.

middleagedandinarage · 06/11/2024 10:25

Balloonhearts · 06/11/2024 09:48

It's just him building his immune system. They all catch everything going that first year of nursery. If not now, you have it when he starts school.

Agree, the first winter is continual! It's worth sticking it out though

Nettleskeins · 06/11/2024 10:23

Playgroups and social life also give you bugs but at least it's not literally a petri dish. And you can go to a playground with a runny nose, and you aren't paying for the privilege. Just imho mind you

anon202420252026 · 06/11/2024 10:22

It's always rough the first few months they start but if continues for 6 months or more have him checked for asthma.

Dd picked up everything at nursery. There was a constant cold, cough and runny nose and it was asthma.

NewNameNoelle · 06/11/2024 10:21

Mine were never particularly ill with nursery. A few chesty cold and snotty noses, but never more than 2 or 3 days off a year.

Perhaps your nursery isn’t the right one for you or perhaps he’s more predisposed to illness. Although with two older siblings you’d think he’d already have a reasonable exposure to germs.