ExH brought his dog in my house without permission

Cats in separate rooms and/or allowed out all day. Dog to stay in garden all day and/or cheap dog walker found.

*the only thing

@Lake9mo not good advice. 'Firm words' and 'just this once' cut no ice with an abusive ex partner.

The not thing that works is swiftly dealing with this problem in the most humane way possible that involves next to no communication with the ex

Drop at his vets. Or ANY vet if he doesn't have a vet. ' this is not my dog, I cannot care for it, I'm sorry to leave this with you' and then out you walk. A brief message to him saying that's what you have done and there you go - you've enforced a hard boundary with a hard action

@AllYearsAround that would be unbelievably cruel to the dog

I’d be tempted to take the dog back to his place and just go in to feed it, and let it shit everywhere, but that’s not fair on the dog. I’d there a Facebook group local to you who could help? Or drop it off at the vets and say you found it.

Put it back in his house, open the three days worth of food and leave loads of water for it.
Text him that that's what you've done.

Then he has a couple of days to sort something out.

The dog will destroy his house in the meantime.

You could always report it to the RSPCA of he hasn't sorted anything in a couple of days.

how can she with two cats and working long days?

Take the kids to his house to collect some stuff- food and dog stuff.

Stay there with the kids every other night, for the dog and the kids.

Oh what a terrible situation - terrible of him pushing boundaries like that but also your children letting the dog in (without you knowing). I think you either keep the dog until exH returns especially as you say your kids love the dog, or you put the dog in kennels until exH returns but with the real possibility of not getting any money back. If the kids are bonded to the dog, I would allow the dog to stay this one time but VERY firm words being had with exH and kids. Also, the dog may know your kids' smells so he might be most comfortable with them and being put in vets/kennels could be distressing for him.

I appreciate OP is in a sticky situation but that doesn't mean a rescue is going to be willing or able to board a dog in for 2 weeks until OP's ex reappears - that's not what rescues exist to do, and they can't take it permanently to rehome either because OP doesn't have the legal right to relinquish ownership because she doesn't own it. If a dog is abandoned the correct legal route to follow is to contact the local authority dog warden, but they may not agree this dog counts as abandoned since it's not actually on the streets and its owner is known.

This. Your ex is a total twat OP.

Can you get food from his house? Dog food and in fact food for the kids?

Well the vet can keep it then, but i certainly wouldn’t be.

And it sounds like the OP can no way afford kennels. So options are either she shuts it up in his house 24 hours a day for two weeks and pops in once a day to feed it. Or it goes to the vets, a warden or a rescue??? Or she has it in her house home alone for 9 hours and hopes it doesn’t eat the cats?

I’d have to take the dog to the vet to be pts
wtaf?!?
also
id be tempted to let it out to roam
what is wrong with ppl? why should the poor dog suffer because he has a shitty owner.
OP I'd hand him to a vet or dog warden and say you found as a stray.

@silentwallflower I'm sure you mean well, but are you seriously suggesting the 'skint' OP pays a few hundred quid for this problem she didn't ask for? I mean, come on

If you ask @MNHQ to move thread to the dog house, someone likely will come forward with practical help, @CfCfCftooMuch

Did you both miss the bit where she said she’s skint and using up bits in the freezer? I’m sure that means she doesn’t have a spare few hundred quid. I’m guessing for some people that’s unimaginable and they’d just put it on a credit card if necessary. Not everyone is able to do that though.

I would take it to his own vet and not give any of your own details. 'Here's a dog, it isn't mine, it has been dumped on me and I cannot care for it' and then just walk out. They can hardly rugby tackle you to the ground and force you to stay

Not sure what else you can do tbh that doesn't involve taking up an awful lot of your time and energy so you just need a quick solution - which obviously then involves hassle for the vets etc but that's a him problem and it's nothing to do with you

He sounds like a sadist, trying to put the OP in a situation where she feels compelled to be cruel at second hand. He's pitting two loving creatures against each other.

You can't take compassionate leave or a day off sick, can you, OP? What area are you in? Maybe some Mumsnetters could help you call round different kennels and so on?

OP has been abundantly clear that her ex will not pay her anything. If she had the sort of ex who was going to take financial responsibility for his pet instead of abandon it, she'd not be in this position in the first place.

I'd be really tempted to just let it out of the house to roam around, but that's not fair to the dog (or the wildlife it might kill). I'd take it to a vet, saying you found it wandering and assume they will check the microchip and call your ex. It will be up to him to sort something out then.

As a dog owner, this seems the best solution, it will cost a few hundred quid, but its the most humane thing to do, and you will have to settle the bill, and chase the money off him.

The money might persuade him to stop acting like a selfish absolute prick in the future.

I would get a friend to take it to a vet and say they found it in the street. They will contact him. If he tells them to contact you say that you had to let it out as you told him you couldn’t look after it.

Alternatively take it to HIS vet; let them scan it and contact him. Refuse to answer the phone/texts. In fact, block him on everything for his holiday period.

That's a good idea actually.