New colleague commenting on name

If it's any consolation I checked how client spelled his name and asked him if he was a Dock or a Dick. Mr Haddock was not impressed 😁 I still cringe twenty years later.

Is your name Toja?

Reminds me of the time I worked for QVC over 25 years ago and i mispronounced a gentlemen’s name. His name
was Captain Bastard. He pronounced it B’stard a la Hyacinth but it’s easy done.

op this woman asked you how your surname is pronounced otherwise how would she know? She could have offended you either way really. Give her a chance and it will be soon clear if she’s a cow or not. Good luck in your new job!

dear mrs balloequex- you are taking the humf unecessarily-you are paid to work there not make friends.remarkable thing in life is other people-arent you. let it go

@Ifyouseeitsayit1983 what you should reply to
I bet lots of people pronounce it wrong is
No. Only idiots.
Shut her down immediately.

Yeah she sounds like a total twat. But she also sounds like the sort of twat that will keep being twatty, and therefore seal their own fate. I agree with the kill through kindness approach.

If a new person started yesterday in any place I've worked and immediately complained about something it would be major red flag. It's like declaring you don't want to be a team player and you will be consistent trouble. Unless it was extremely serious, like criminal serious just keep your thoughts to yourself for the first few weeks.

Is your first name Hyacinth?

I'll go for Pinis or Ballas.

I don’t think you’re unreasonable to be upset. She sounds like a dick. Making a joke about someone’s name is a no go area unless you know them well and know they’re okay with it. Completely unacceptable from a new work colleague, in fact it could be classed as mild bullying IMO. Do not bring it up with your line manager or say anything about it to anyone. People will make up their own minds about her, as they will about you. You don’t want people to think you complain about every little thing all the time. Concentrate on making a good impression on your new colleagues, and be on your guard around this woman.

I mispronounced Cockburn once .. apparently pronounced Coburn .. not the way I said it, that made it sound like a horrible disease.

Sometimes people can blurt out quite silly things without thinking. Especially when they’re in a new job. She might have thought it was a funny ice-breaker OP but without considering that it is a very tiresome joke when you’re the owner of said name. I wouldn’t go to a line manager about it. You’re both still settling in, just see how she behaves towards you in the future. It may be that she’s not your type of person and you just don’t gel. Chemistry is not just a romance thing, it plays a role in all our relationships. You don’t have to like everyone but you do have to find a way to muddle through with workmates so that you’re not dreading going into the office. Try not to let it get you down, it’s not worth the added stress when you have enough on your plate with the new job.

Dear Mrs Cockburn, hope you like your new job. No obviously don't complain and try not to take so much notice of what colleagues say. People say stuff to fill dead air.

I can understand feeling anxious in a new job and then having this to contend with. The PP who said she was mocking it sounds right. I think I'd do nothing for now and see how things pan out but be wary of her. Hope you're OK OP.

What would you say to your new manager?

That this woman asked you how to pronounce your surname and you perceived her tone to be derogatory?

And then she said that she would bet that people pronounced it wrong.

And that you think she thinks she attempting to convey that she is better than you by telling you that she doesn't like instant coffee?

Pernice or Pennis?

I certainly wouldn't mention her behaviour to my new manager if I was you! I would just ignore, be nice, give her the benefit of the doubt about being nervous. If it turns out she is horrible then others will pick it up, but I wouldn't complain in a new job (especially for something which isn't a massive issue, just not very nice).

She was mocking it. If someone tells you their name is cockburn you don't then say cock-burn and take the piss

Sounds like she’s going to be a pain in the arse, but your manager should figure that out for themselves! If you were established and she was new, then I might say something, but I don’t think you’re in the right position to do so now.

I don't know what office everyone else works in but in mine that would be completely unacceptable behaviour. I wouldn't say anything to your manager but I would write down date time exact words and any witnesses in case it escalates. She needs to grow the fuck up

Thanks, a lot of you have made me actually feel worse for doing nothing wrong

I get the feeling you're extremely sensitive, nobody has made you feel worse, you have asked for their thoughts, they gave them.

Starting a new job is emotionally draining. It’ll get better. Just put this conversation aside and concentrate on what went well in your new job today.

Omgggg 😄😄, I didn't even think, sorry op!

See how easy it is to say something dumb

I wouldn't worry about it - you've got her card marked, just wait and see how she behaves moving forward x

Nobody said you've done anything wrong and the responses are positively mild for AIBU.
OP, the workplace is generally rife with wankers. Her quip was possibly nothing but a bad, ill-thought-out joke. You're hyper-focusing on it, and it's a waste of time.