New colleague commenting on name

Is it Wiley?
I know a Wiley who's forever being called Willy 🙄

Very unprofessional of her. She obviously lacks social skills. I'd be very irritated and would probably mention it to HR straight off (depending on the situation) to nip it in the bud.

I thought I was the only Mrs Skrot in the world 🥹

She made a passing comment!

I thought it was going to be that she has called you the wrong name for weeks!

Don't be so ridiculous!

Well you openly just said if it’s pronounced wrong then it sounds like cock/ penis/Willy so she just stated a fact did she not? Lighten up Mrs crock.

The colleague was being an arse. And yes I would avoid her and be as perfunctory as professionally possible. BUT... the OP has a name that sounds like a penis .... And she has to develop resilience around it. She can not control what people say to her to but she can control her reaction to it. It is very odd to me that after years of having this name she is still upset and writing about it on social media when someone says something. Then when someone on here said something she didn't like she told them "they had made her feel worse" I don't think Op has to accept bad behaviour but I do think she needs to work on her resilience.

So asking how your name is pronounced in a derogatory manner

How can you even ask this question in a derogatory manner? To me it sounds that OP is way too sensitive, not everything is a personal insult. I have a colleague like that, the other day she was offended because someone said they like winter but her birthday is in the summer, so clearly the other person must mean they don't like the snowflake..

Is it Cockburn?

years ago my colleague forwarded an email from his fiance (it was the early 2000s when people forwarded jokes to each other in emails). I saw her surname and thought it was hilarious: told my colleague “no wonder she’s so keen to get married.”

as revenge he introduced me to his wife’s brother. I now have the funny surname

I mean I'm guessing your name has been commented on before, it can't be the first time. I only say this as my surname was a cause for much merriment at 1 point due to a particular TV show. I had to let it go over my head, no way could I be reporting it every time. I am just imagining how the conversation would go with your line manager, please don't do that😅

Are people derogatory with it?

I am also asked all the time, and I do have to correct pronunciation repeatedly. That is fine.

Only very very very rarely is it done derogatorily nowadays. When it is derogatory, it is not ok.

Or Knaub

I think you are overreacting massively.

We wouldn't get on, I'd see the joke as an ice breaker

I take your Cock, and I raise you Handcock. My long-suffering, but good humoured pal.

@Moveoverdarlin Yes, maybe she felt a bit embarrassed and tried to laugh it off to ease the tension.

Honestly, reading some of these comments, it’s no surprise that so many workplaces feel toxic. It’s as if you have to monitor every single word, constantly on edge in case someone interprets it the wrong way—and then all chaos breaks loose 🙄

As the owner of a surname that people just seem incapable of pronouncing 🙄 you have my sympathies. I am also highly sensitive and would be upset too. You’re not over reacting, but I probably wouldn’t go to a manager. If she continued to tease you about it, then I would say something to a manager.
good luck in your new job!

I think you’re being a little over sensitive tbh…and I say that as someone whose original surname was ‘Cock’ 😂

I have a non-English name, and my mother in law cannot come to terms that people don’t find it as difficult or as funny as her to be able to pronounce or spell my name.

She’s the idiot that can’t handle anything other than ‘Smith’ or similar.

OP I’m sorry that some people on here are proving the worst. I came off mumsnet for a while and seeing responses like the ones you are getting make me realise I’m not a mumsnetter and I shall make this my last ever post!!

I used to work in a school where the head of senior leadership was called Mr Allcock. Pronounced how it looks. He was a very good sport about it but I’m sure you can imagine all the fun they had with that name (at an all boys school!)

Agree it's not one to report to a line manager - but she was being a bit rude for saying that lots of people would pronounce it wrongly, and twattish for openly laughing

I think I'd have just said 'not really, no. Most people just ask and then say it correctly'

I know what you mean re the superiority - but trust me, more people will note that about her!

Totally agree with this.

And despite what others have said, I think that it’s not trivial and pretty rude from your colleague, but perhaps that’s the millennial snowflake in me 😂 I wouldn’t waste any time, thought or effort on her by reporting, it but just keep the mental note there and assess as you get to know her better. It really might have been a one-off or she might be like that all the time…. time will tell!

I am asked how I pronounce my surname on a daily basis and have been for most of my life. I don't think it's worth getting upset about.

So asking how your name is pronounced in a derogatory manner, and laughing about the possibility of it being pronounced wrongly in a way that sounds like it belongs in the playground, is perfectly fine, professional behaviour?

Do you work in a school?

I haven’t read the responses but as per usual mumsnet is bringing out the worst in people.

Just wanted to send a bit of love out your way before I reflect on this and give some advice.

The issue is the new colleague, not you. If they are so ignorant to have to associate a name that they don’t understand to placate their small mind then that’s them, not you.

Ill respond later with advice on what I think you could do!

I was slightly sympathetic on your post until you suggested telling your line manager. You absolutely cannot take trivia like this to your line manager and expect to be taken seriously, especially not at the start.

Just don't be friends with her, be professional but nothing more.