Has anyone else stop organising stuff...

It is kind of sad with things like family/ friends group holidays when you realise no one but you would make the effort to organise it. However, I value it so much that I do it anyway. It adds a lot to my life and I enjoy it, so I do it. For me it's worth the effort.

I'm a disorganised person and one of my friends is a PA so is hyper organised when it comes to suggesting and booking things. I'm hugely grateful to her for organising the things she does. I'm shocked that you are all being left out of pocket. I thought it was standard to get the organiser a meal /cuppa/glass of wine when out to say thank you for booking X, Y or Z and thought this was always the norm (a small contribution "for your shoe leather" to the person who has done the running around).

A couple of my friends and my partner have ADHD, so I know with them if I don't organise it either won't get done or we'll be rushing last minute, which I prefer not to do.

I don't mind organising as I have it down to a fine art now.

I don't passive-aggressively leave stuff, because it seems petty. If a parcel is a return within a certain date for example, and you let them miss that window on purpose, it's just mean. Same goes for if it was someone's birthday present.

But I notice a lot of people tend to overplan and overthink it and that's exhausting. For example my aunt will say "want to go out for a meal" and then message me with about 5 different options of places to eat (I'm not fussy and no dietary requirements) all of which will be the same kind of pubs I'm not familiar with (so all the same types of cuisine) and have no opinions on. Then she wants to tell me about the location of each (all within a mile). Then she wants to book it 6 weeks in advance. Then she'll spend at least an hour looking over the menu the night before deciding what she's eating, and want to talk to everyone else about it. Whereas if I ask my friends out for a meal at a pub I just message them a day and time, usually the same week, see if they can make it (they always can), and then turn up at said day/time.

So if you plan like my aunt then yes I'm not surprised you find it exhausting.

Not just out of pocket but slave for the week too!

Good idea letting someone else pick up the slack for the other stuff.

I've also started 'forgetting' to do stuff like everyone else seems to do

Oh yeah that still needs doing

Oh yeah! We need to do that

That's a good idea

Etc etc
.

I organise stuff I really really want to do. Otherwise I don’t.

Yeah I've quit quit too

I only do what's absolutely necessary and in my interests

Yes I feel exactly the same. It's just exhausting. And when certain friends say 'shall we meet us' I've started saying 'sure let me know when you are free and what you want to do' I'm done with being the organiser!

I don't organise anything unless I am asked directly. With the friendship group, one of you will have to organise it for everyone, that's just how these things go. With doing things for my partner, I don't. He is a big boy and I don't meddle in his affairs.

Me. I use to organize an extended family holiday, stopped that. Nobody has bothered to take it upon themselves since so guess it was never really that important.

Meals out and days out for extended family. Never reciprocated. Always ordered the most expensive things when I was paying. Stopped that now too as supporting DC in Uni means we are having to allocate £750 a month to that.

Buy only token gifts now as nobody made any effort for my gifts.

Still help older members of the family with practical things like shopping and gardening. Also do a few meals in my home a few times a year.

TBH I was a very social person in the past. As soon as I hit 50 I just felt like I have been there done that. Just cannot be bothered anymore.

The world relies on people who do stuff

You just have to decide if the extra effort is worth it for you

It's not being grumpy at all